My daughter Sadie Lynn was due on May 26, 2007 which was my father’s birthday and also the day that my husband purposed to me so that day was pretty significant to us. As it got closer to the due date I was nervous about making sure we were all prepared for her big arrival. We both finished our school finals and due to low blood pressure making me black out all the time I was pretty much stuck at home through out my pregnancy unless my husband Dustin took me out somewhere. Dustin planned to take a motorcycle safety course two days before her due date which I was all nervous we would spend the money on it and then he would have to miss it because I went into labor.

On Thursday May 24, 2007 Dustin had just finished his safety course and was with me until work that night from 5-1 am….and I really wanted to clean the apartment, do laundry, and go grocery shopping. I had this sudden feeling that everything needed to be done. So we did laundry went shopping and did some cleaning. At this point I was very sick of people touching my belly and calling to see if she had been born yet. So while Dustin went to work I invited my friend to come over and hang out for a couple hours. We watched a movie and I started to feel very uncomfortable and sick…I just kept ignoring it though because I thought it was just nerves or some stomach bug. So she left and then Dustin came home on break and I told him I thought I might be having contractions…he said to walk around and take a bath and see how I felt afterward. We had already had one false alarm a month ago so we weren’t too sure this was the real thing. I took a bath thinking that would help but it didn’t so I called him around 12:30 and he came home. We called the obgyn and the midwife asked how far apart the contractions where. AT this point they were every 5-6 minutes on the dot and pretty campy. Since I had tested positive for Group Strep B she said to come in to the hospital since I would need medicine soon.

With excitement building we packed up and headed out to the car at 1:45am and driving over to the hospital was a exciting and also painful trip since my contractions kept coming every 5 minutes and the bumpy roads did not help. When we got there the nurse checked me and said I was around 2 to 3cm…Yeah!!! I was so nervous they were going to send me home…this was the real thing now! They gave me the medicine through the IV for 20 minutes and monitored the baby for awhile then let me get out of bed which felt great. I did not like laying in bed while in labor. We tried the tub for awhile…but after awhile I got too hot and dizzy and got out. We were both exhausted and it was 2am when we got to the hospital so there was no sleep in the near future. I tried walking a bit but then decided to try a shower which felt nice….around 4am the contractions got closer and we were delighted to hear that after a couple more hours I had dilated to 4cm. I did not like when the doctor did the exams because my cervix was hard for them to find so it hurt a lot and every time I got a contraction I wanted to be left alone.

Then the nurse suggested this big ball to squat on and that was the best idea ever! Dustin rubbed my back and I swayed back and forth on the ball every time a contraction hit…by 7am the pain was getting worse and I was very tired…I started to lose it but then this nurse who was the best nurse I ever met..came in and calmed me down and stayed with me for a long time helping me concentrate on just getting through the contraction. Around 9:30am I was 6cm and was unable to deal with the pain anymore…I was disappointed in myself but the pain just became to much and felt like my hips where being torn apart every time a contraction hit. I also was tried and so was Dustin so I decided to get a epidural which was so great. After waiting forever I finally got the epidural around 11am and was able to rest. I did not like how my legs went numb and I still felt faint contractions for awhile and the numbness switched in legs. I also had to have a catheter which was unpleasant.

Around 1:30 I felt different and pressure in my butt and asked the nurse to call the doctor..she checked me and found I was almost 10cm…I had to wait for the last lil bit to dilate which seemed like forever. They turned the epidural off and it was pushing time. Around 2:45pm they let me start pushing which was exciting and both hard work. I knew we were closer to seeing our beautiful baby but it still was painful and scary. The thing that kept me going was the encouraging nurses and my husband encouraging me and looking so happy. He was watching and the smile on his face was priceless. Anytime I felt like giving up I saw him looking so happy and saying “sweety she is almost here”…that helped me a lot. I was not so good at pushing at first…I just wanted it over with so I pushed anytime I could, but then they instructed me to push only when a contraction came. After an hour the doctor was thinking of giving me a little bit of pitocin to push things along…I did not want this though and I am glad I did not end up needing it. I started pushing with all my might and got the hang of it…even after nineteen hours of labor I somehow found energy to push her out. As the baby started to crown they let me touch her hair which was a great experience and when Sadie Lynn finally entered the world I was both in shock and amazement that this was my baby that was in my belly for nine months and she was on me skin to skin. It was the best moment and I will never forget looking into her bright blue eyes and getting to hold her for the first time.

Dustin cut the cord and she was weighed…8lbs and 2 oz!! Big girl she also was 19 ½ inches long and had tons of hair! She still has tons of dark brown hair and green/blue eyes. My recovery was slow…nobody warned me how much it hurts afterward! But after about a month I felt more like myself and breastfeeding was going great and still is!

I am very happy with the overall care and treatment we received at the hospital..the nurses followed our birth plan and respected our space and wishes. And Sadie Lynn is a healthy, energetic, and happy 7 ¾ month old!! She is our joy and I still find myself just amazed at this lil miracle God blessed us with.

Today I rec’d an email from Elena Tonetti, creator of the Birth As We Know It DVD, letting me know about her “birthshops” schedule for this year and next.  I thought some of you might be interested in knowing the locations and dates for this.  Contact information (and for details about what a ‘birthshop’ is) is at the bottom of this post.

January 25, 2008- Palo Alto, CA
“BAWKI” Screening at the “Blossom”
Mendy, elementsofmagic@gmail.comFebruary 23-24, 2008- Sebastopol, CA
“BIB” Birthshop, $350 single, $650 couples

March 4, 2008- San Francisco, CA @6:30pm
“BAWKI” Screening at The Natural Birth
Institute- http://www.naturalbirthinstitute.com

Earth at birthsage@wildmail.com or 510-410-5640

March 21-23, 2008- Los Angeles
Raw Lifestyle Film Festival
http://www.serenityspaces.org

March 25, 2009- Los Angeles
“BAWKI” Screening

March 26-27, 2008- Los Angeles- $350
“BIB” Birthshop
Featuring Raw Chef Dorit of Serenity Spaces
Sheila, 562-843-1999

March 29, 2008- San Francisco, CA
One Day “BIB” Workshop http://www.naturalbirthinstitute.com
Earth at birthsage@wildmail.com or 510-410-5640

April 6-12, 2008- Hawaii
“BIB” Birthshop Level I & II-$1800
Including lodging, gourmet meals, swimming w/whales,
template ritual, and Jin-Shin Jitsu, etc.
A week long intensive!

April 18, 2008- Palo Alto, CA
“BAWKI” Screening- $10
Mendy, elementsofmagic@gmail.com

April 19-20, 2008- Palo Alto, CA
“BIB” Birthshop- $350
Mendy, elementsofmagic@gmail.com

May 3-4, 2008-Chico, CA
“BIB” Birthshop- $350

May 16-18, 2008
Conference of California Midwifery Alliance- Sebastopol, CA

May, 2008- New York, NY
BIB Birthshop
Level 1: May 21-22, $450
Level 2: May 23-24 $500

June 2008- South Africa!
Johannesburg Conference- May 28-29
Johannesburg- BIB- May 31-June 1
Cape Town Conference- June 5-6
Cape Town- BIB- June 7-8

June 20-22, 2008- Singapore

June 27-29, 2008- New Zealand

September 12-14, 2008- Arizona
Raw Lifestyle Film Festival
Dorit, ddorit5@sbcglobal.net

September-October, 2008- Poland
Three “BIB” Birthshops:
September 27-28, October 1-2, October 4-5
Marek, mkotas@gmail.com

October 10-12, 2008- UK
Birth Into Being Birthshop
Anna, stampedebreakfast@mac.com

2009April 9-12, 2009- Elena’s Conference in CA, Featuring Russian Midwives:
Tatiana Sargunas and Svetlana Akimova, Amber Hartnell, plus a brilliant team of presenters.

To register for all Birthshops, please contact Crystal: crystal@birthintobeing.com or call 530-566-0199.
For local information such as lodging or directions, please contact the local organizer.

You Have Control Over Your Birth Experience by Rayven Perkins

I have given birth to four children, in three different states. Each hospital had different policies and procedures, and each birth experience was unique.

My last delivery, just a few months ago, was to boy/girl twins.

I started my pregnancy with a new-to-me doctor I disliked, who was ready to schedule a cesarean in my first trimester. About halfway through the pregnancy, we moved, and I found an absolutely wonderful doctor. I expressed to him my desire to do everything humanly possible to deliver these twins vaginally. I had never had a c-section before, and really didn’t want to have one.

He respected my decision, and agreed to only mention a c-section if an emergency situation occurred.

At the start of my third trimester, I had the opportunity to tour the hospital I was to deliver in. While on the tour, I asked if twin deliveries were required to be in the operating room, which is standard in most hospitals, and the touring nurse said to me, “How else would you have a c-section?” She seemed shocked that I would even consider giving birth to twins in any other way.

On the delivery day, I was able to labor in a birthing room and was transferred to the OR for the delivery only.

I had a normal labor, and they finally wheeled me into the OR. There were about six medical personnel in the room, busy preparing for the delivery and awaiting the doctor. I was concerned that the first baby was on his way out, and kept saying to the nurses “I think the baby is coming”, but for the most part, they ignored me. I said this maybe five times. Finally, one nurse told me not to worry, that they would catch him should he decide to make an appearance.

Amidst all this activity, I suddenly had a thought, and announced, “Oh, by the way, under no circumstances whatsoever do I want an episiotomy.”

Immediately, the six people in the room froze, and dropped everything they were working on to turn and look at me. So I repeated myself. They looked at me as though I was growing horns out of my head. Finally one nurse told me that she would make sure that the doctor knew.

The delivery went well. The second twin decided to turn breech at the last moment, but my doctor, respecting my decision to do everything possible to avoid a c-section was able to manually turn her. I avoided the episiotomy as well, which proved to be completely unnecessary.

The next morning, as I was walking around trying to regain my strength, I saw several other new mothers sitting on ice packs, moaning and groaning. They had not realized the episiotomy was a choice.

All the nurses who cared for me after the delivery treated me oddly. It was as though I were some sort of celebrity. Finally, one nurse spilled the beans. It seemed that I was the first mother to deliver twins vaginally in that hospital in over ten years.

Ten years.

It amazes me how much hospitals and doctors take certain situations for granted. No vaginal twin deliveries in a decade? How many of those mothers were lead to believe their bodies wouldn’t do what came naturally to them? How many of them had unnecessary surgeries, higher risk of infections, and major recover for nothing?

You have a lot more control over the birth of your child in a hospital setting than you are aware of.

–An episiotomy is optional, but if you do not speak up and vocalize your desire not to have one, it may happen to you.

–A c-section is optional in some cases. There are circumstances where it is necessary, but many are done for convenience when other options are available.

–Pain medications and even IVs are optional. If you chose not to have any pain medications, then you do not need to be hooked up to an IV at all.

–Lying flat on your back in a bed is optional. If you do not have an epidural, you do not need to remain in bed through labor and delivery. Feel free to move about, take a shower, and try different labor positions that you would like to get more comfortable.

The birth of your baby should be a happy experience. It should not be one of fear and disappointment. Simply talk with your doctor and hospital staff about your desires. Do this early in the pregnancy. If it seems like your doctor does not take your concerns seriously, find a new doctor.

—

Rayven Perkins is an expert at saving money at home. She has spent 7 years finding and implementing unique cost-cutting tips that allow her family to live comfortably as a one-income family. Her site http://www.stay-a-stay-at-home-mom.com examines resources and tips on Reducing Expenses, Stretching Your Dollar, and Supplementing Income in order to stay a SAHM

Many thanks to Christina Mroz of Complete Motions. Christina is a Wellness and Life Coach, and offers Holy Yoga and Pilates Instruction. You can check out her web site here.

When I became pregnant, I knew I wanted to have this child as naturally as possible. Prior to my birth experience, only one other person in my family had ever tried a natural birth and unfortunately, that birth ended in a caesarian. However, I still wanted to see how my body would handle birth without intervention. As a yoga and Pilates instructor, I felt very prepared physically for this birth.

As my due date grew closer, my patience grew less. It seemed that everyone was either calling or asking if we had had our baby yet. I knew that our baby would be born when it was ready, but a large part of me just wanted the baby here NOW. I finally convinced my husband (Michael) to try intercourse to induce labor. Well, it worked. I heard a pop. At first, I was not sure what it was but as I proceeded to the bathroom water started to leak out. Since this was my first pregnancy, I was not sure what was happening. After awhile in the bathroom Michael asked if everything was ok—I responded by telling him I think my water broke. The television portrays a women’s water breaking in one huge gush—that was not true for me at all. It was more like little trickles that occurred every once in awhile.

As the reality sunk it, I called my midwife. This was about 10pm. At this point, I was not having any contractions; she said to notify her when contractions started. About a half hour later, I was having 30-second contractions about 5 minutes apart. This was when we got a little nervous, mostly because we lived an hour away from the birth center. Our plan was to go to my brother’s house (who lived a mile from the birth center) when active labor started. Again, we called my midwife; she did not see an immediate need to head to my brother’s but told us to do what felt comfortable. At 11pm, we left for his house. We arrived there an hour later, he was trying to sleep but his girlfriend was anxiously waiting for us. I am so glad we left when we did because having contractions in the car is not much fun.

Once at my brother’s house my contractions started to change. They grew stronger and longer. I did not want to wake my brother’s roommates or scare my brother’s girlfriend half to death so when a contraction started I went into the hallway. During each contraction, my back just hurt, so Michael would gently rub my back. After another hour, my contractions were close to 1 minute in length and about 2 minutes apart. Michael called my midwife and we decided to meet at the birth center in a half hour. At his point my brother had awaken—or did I wake him (not sure).

Right before I was suppose to leave for the birth center, I threw up all over his bed and my clothes. I then had to borrow clothes from his girlfriend (note to self: next time bring extra clothes and have a bucket near by). As we left, I felt bad for throwing up and thought I had ruined any chance that my brother’s girlfriend would want to have children.

When we reached the birth center, my midwife checked my cervix and dilatation. To both my husband’s surprise and mine, she said I was fully dilated and my cervix was gone. What! I was hoping she said I was at least 6 centimeters. I decided it would be nice to get in a warm tub to ease my back pain. The tub was a little bit of heaven. As the baby dropped, my pain increased, especially in my back so during each contraction someone continued to rub my back. During this time, I was pretty much in a daze. I remember little things like soft music playing, my midwife calmly waiting in the chair next to me, Michael calling our family to tell them to starting driving to the birth center, and Michael reporting that a deer was eating the flowers out in the flower garden. This was so odd because the birth center is in the middle of town. At one point, I remember seeing a small fishing net that you use in a fish tank and I said, “Are you going fishing?” I had no idea what it was for—well I soon found out. It was to clean out the water in the tub—yes, stuff does come out when you push. Did I care, not really—by this point, I was too focused on pushing this baby out than to worry about anything else.

During the “dropping” phase I became very impatient—it felt like it was taking forever and plus it hurt. At different points during this phase, Michael would walk in and out of the room—I thought it must be hard for him to see me like this. After about 1 ½ hours a head started to appear, along with some blood. As I continued to push, the head continued to stay out but the rest did not come. After a couple of minutes, my midwife said in a very direct voice, “We need to get mom out of the tub NOW!” Yikes. Prior to this, she was so calm and relaxed so I knew she was not kidding but I could not imagine getting out of the tub now. Well, both of my midwives grabbed my arms and helped me out. I then knelt on all fours. She then wanted me to step one leg forward into a lung—I even commented to her “Are you kidding?” Again, they helped me move my leg up. As soon as I did that, the baby just slide out. They quickly wrapped the baby up. Immediately I asked is it a boy or girl—they did not even look. Therefore, I unwrapped this little bundle with blood and other fluids all over it to discover that we had a girl. Hannah Johanna Christina Mroz was born at 3:55am. Then they gave me a stool to squat on and handed me our new baby. Michael got the honor of cutting the cord. Almost instantly, Hannah latched on. About 25 minutes later, I delivered the placenta—what a breeze. I then moved into the bed to relax and bond with my new baby girl and Michael.

For the next hour, they monitored Hannah and me. My family also arrived to see this new addition to our family. Before leaving the birth center Hannah was weighed, measured, and her feet were stamped. I need to go to the bathroom, which was difficult because it stung. My midwife also checked my perineum and discovered that I had torn a little. She then numbed my perineum and sewed it back up.

Right before we were leaving, they asked if I wanted to see the placenta. As they brought it out my family and husband gathered around. We were all very amazed by the role this organ plays in birth—truly a miracle.

At about 8am, Mike, Hannah, my mom, and I left for our house. My family could not believe I was going home so soon and even tried to talk me into staying longer. Less than 12 hours later Mike and I were back home with our new baby girl—what a neat experience!

On September 26th 1999, we celebrated my husband’s birthday, a day early. I was not due with our first until October 24. My brother called to say hi. I recalled saying to him…. It’ll be soon. He said ya they all say that!

We went out for a quiet evening on September 28th. Around 1 am September 29th, I felt like my water broke. But nothing was going on and I didn’t want to go to the hospital too soon. So I waited until I was sure and that something was going on. About 3:30am I woke Mark up. He rolled over and said “ ya right” . Then sat bolt upright in bed and said really??? … okay I’m up.

I had everything ready to go. We went to the hospital. They didn’t believe that I was in labor. I was at 4 cm and 80% effaced. Until I threw up all over the nurse that was checking me in… she realized very quickly that I was in transition. They admitted me. I sat in the whirlpool for about an hour or so. Then insisted I had to get up and go to the bathroom. The Nurse checked me and discovered I was fully dilated and baby was descending. He was comingJ

So they did all they do, I was a first time mom. I let them lead me too much. The Dr was attempting to cut me to ease the baby’s arrival. Mark about decked to DR J insisting that his wife did not want thatJ GO MARK!

At 7:11 Wednesday September 29, 1999after about 20 minutes of pushing…. Lucas Graham Visscher was born. He weighed 7# and 4 ounces. He was 20 inches long. He was fine for a bit and then they felt he had a breathing issue. Since he came so quickly he had what they called “wet lung” and was in what we called his cage…. For a few days. On that Saturday we were able to take our first born son home. My parents drove from Pennsylvania to Michigan to see their daughter’s firstborn child. Mark’s parents were in the same town and were very shocked When Mark called Wednesday morning to say we had a baby! It was very tense for a few days there but things did smooth out and our son is now over 7 years old, lost a tooth, but more importantly than any academic or physical change… he has accepted Jesus into his life and we can see he has a tender heart towards things of God.

Before we knew it we were excited to discover we were going to be parents of 2 J that story is yet to come… and so are a few more:)

Kathleen

Many thanks to Awnya, who was kind enough to share the story of the birth of her little boy. He’s just a couple of years old! You can visit Awnya’s felt business here. They have great stuff!

The contractions started at about 3am. These were serious contractions, but a few times before I would be having some pretty good ones and they would just fizzle out after about 3 hours, so I went out to the couch to wait. After about an hour and a half of TV and nothing changing, I decided to take a warm bath. Sitting in the tub was really nice and very soothing…but the contractions started to come a little harder. I decided it was time to go to the hospital.

Without bothering to get dressed, I woke up my husband and let him know it was time. We quickly dressed and scooped up our 2 kids. My husband took them to the neighbors house and I pulled the car around. Let me say, it was not easy to drive and have a contraction! We got to the hospital and the receptionist didn’t believe I was in labor because between contractions I was still able to laugh and be fairly pleasant! When she saw me have a contraction, her eyes got really big and she shouted “We have a live one here” to the other nurses….I was then ushered to a room where the nurse verified that I really was in labor and not only that, I was dilated to an 8 and 100% effaced with bulging water. (This was about 6:15am) Then moved me to my labor room and my Dr. arrived. They gave me a little bit of some kind of drug in my IV because there wasn’t enough time for anything else. The Dr. then broke my water and 3 pushes later my son was born. I had been in the hospital just over an hour when he came. He was perfect in every way and started to pee on the Dr. (as if it was his fault that he was just born!)

Today we are celebrating my son Isaac’s 7th birthday. This is the story of my pregnancy with him, and his premature birth and hospital stay. (I wrote it way back when he was a one year old. Isaac now has two younger brothers, ages almost 6 and 4.) After such a rocky start in his life, it is so wonderful to see him so healthy, strong, and smart. He is my miracle baby, even if he is a big seven year old now.

Let me tell you a little about my husband and me and the way we are as parents. We have always been close to our children. We hold our babies a lot. We do not leave them to cry. We do not leave them with babysitters when they are babies. We carry our babies in a sling. Our babies have all slept with us, and so have our toddlers and older ages who feel the need to be close to us at night. We try to be careful in our considerations of how to do things with and for our children. They are very precious to us and we see our role as parents as a Holy commission from God. With our 4th pregnancy and birth, we were about to find out how hard it would be to have so much of what is important to us disrupted and threatened.

When our third child, JP, was 15 months old we were thrilled to become pregnant again. Hubby and I had talked a lot about having an unassisted birth this time around. We felt very confident in our abilities to work together and have a baby without outside help. Hubby had caught babies #2 and 3 and loved that, and I never felt that I needed any other support than that from him. He was the only one I could be real with and that brought me peace.

When I was 2-3 months along I suddenly had some bleeding. I was alarmed at this and immediately began to pray for my baby. I did everything I knew to do to help, and the bleeding did slow down and by the next day had stopped. I was very careful after that to do no heavy lifting, etc. It was right before Christmas and I let a lot of errands and activities go undone. Two weeks later I had an odd episode of a sudden blood pressure surge. After that we went in to see our family doctor. He had no idea what to think of the blood pressure surge, but was able to put our minds to ease about the health of our precious baby, since we were able to hear his heartbeat.

One other puzzling thing at this visit was that I was measuring 4 weeks farther along than I thought I was. The doctor suggested we come back in a few weeks for an ultrasound to check for twins. Although we did not normally consent to ultrasound, because of the bleeding, blood pressure thing, and my much larger than expected self, we decided to go ahead. What we found was that I was actually a month farther along than I thought I was! I would have been less surprised to find that I was carrying triplets! But, still, not many women get to shave a whole month off of their pregnancies in a day, so I wasn’t about to complain! One other odd thing we found was a sort of strange blood bubble right over my cervix. The doctor was not sure what it was all about, but supposed that could be the cause of my periodic bleeding. (I had bled 2 or 3 times between our first visit with him and the ultrasound.)

In the weeks to come I had more bleeding episodes. It usually happened on a Friday, so it was not a time when I could get in to see my midwife from my third pregnancy or the doctor she works with. By Sat. or Sunday it was usually stopped again. I felt very precarious about things. Then, at 21 weeks I started bleeding on a Friday and it did not stop. I went in to see my doctor on Monday, and we decided to do another ultrasound. The blood bubble looked a little different, and at that point my doctor thought I may have placenta previa. He sent me on my way to a high-risk OB that had a more advanced ultrasound. On my way there I felt like I was in a fog. I had never been healthier going into a pregnancy than I was for this one. I had been eating a whole foods diet, no sugar, no meat, no dairy. I felt great. I was expecting to have the very best pregnancy I had ever had. So how could this be happening to me?!

My husband and I went on to the high risk place and had very kind treatment by the staff and doctor there. The baby looked great and healthy in every way. We were asked if we wanted to know the baby’s sex. We had never done this before and I immediately said no. But my husband said to me, “Let’s just have some good news right now. OK?” We have never had a preference about the sex of our babies, and we would have been thrilled with a boy or a girl. Somehow it seemed that it would be encouraging to know who we had inside there. It was very clear that we had another precious son!

We could not tell for sure what the blood bubble was about or if I had placenta previa, but clearly there was a problem and the doctor recommended that I go on full bed rest until further notice. What a shock! Bed rest?! I had 3 children at home, ages 1, 3, and 7. I homeschoolled then. My husband works 24 hour shifts! Oh my…

The drive home was surreal. I was in shock. I was suddenly in a high risk pregnancy. Wow.

We had been considering a few different names for our baby. Once we knew we had a son, there was no doubt in my mind what his name was. Isaac Elijah. Isaac means laughter, and when facing a scary pregnancy, I felt we should name him on faith that he would bring laughter to our lives. Elijah means gift from God. No need to explain that, eh? So, Isaac Elijah was his name.

I was on bed rest for 7 weeks, during which I experienced hemorrhaging 3 different times and was rushed to the hospital. In the hospital I was put on magnesium sulfate and turbutaline to keep my uterus calm. Uteruses are very smart. When they have something foreign inside of them they contract in order to expel it. Unfortunately for me, I kept bleeding, it kept irritating my uterus, and my uterus kept contracting…..which was putting my baby in jeopardy.

When I was 28 weeks I made my final emergency trip to the hospital for my worst hemorrhaging ever. I was found to be dilated to 4 cm. and was bleeding all the time (as I had been for the entire bedrest). We were told it was best for me to plan to stay in the hospital for the duration of my pregnancy since I lived nearly an hour away and things were so precarious. If I had thought bed rest at home was bad, being separated from my children was worse! I had never been away from my children until these hospital visits, and I missed them so badly and was just aching thinking of 3 long months of hospitalization and separation. I had already had to wean Jacob abruptly because of all the contractions I had been having. Now I could not even share cuddles and security with him throughout the day and night. When the children would come to visit me, Jacob refused to sit with me, touch me, or let me touch him. I am sure that all of my tubes and wires looked pretty scary to him.

I had to have the external uterine and contraction monitor belts on me at all times in order to keep tabs on my baby and whether or not I was having a placental abruption. I was told that this was the single most helpful indicator of danger. I hated knowing that my baby was constantly being bombarded with ultrasound. But I felt I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. It was getting to be a familiar feeling.

I was given steroid shots in order to help my baby’s lungs develop quicker. I had reservations about the wisdom of such shots, but with no time to research this, we felt we had to go with this recommendation in the hopes that it would help our baby.

Because of all the bleeding I continued to have, I ended up with a catheter. They did not want me to get out of bed at all, as any movement I had seemed to make the bleeding worse. It was such a humiliating and painful experience to have the catheter put in, and it was so very uncomfortable to have in. But, once again, it really did seem to be something reasonable that had to be done.

After a few days (maybe 5 or so) I started having contractions that I recognized as real ones. Despite all of our efforts, labor could not be stopped. We had increased the medications all that we could, and yet it was happening. Our baby needed to be born. My uterus could not hold him in any longer.

Once the doctors realized what was going on, they told me they wanted me to have a c-section. WHAT?! A c-sec for a 2 pound baby? I was indignant! My third baby had been almost 10 lbs. But, they explained to me that my baby was breech (which I already knew) and for preemies, their heads are more disproportionate to their bodies than full term babies. Apparently, sometimes when a preemie is breech, they will begin to be born before the mom is fully dilated, but then their head gets caught. I did not feel at all convinced that this was a big enough risk that I should submit to a c-section. I had done enough reading to know way more than I wanted to about the risks of the surgery, plus the risks of whatever pain relief I would choose. The doctors stressed that the combination of the breech risks, plus not knowing what other issues my baby might be facing at such an early gestation, that a c-sec would be the best thing. They were very respectful of our concern about having unneeded surgery. We told them we needed some time to pray about this and think it over. They left the room.

We called a few friends (at 5am!) and asked them to pray for the baby to turn out of his breech position so that I could have a vaginal birth. We prayed. Hubby and I decided that if the baby had not turned within 15 minutes that we would go ahead with the c-sec. The baby did not turn. We got the doctors back in and told them we would accept the c-sec. I made it clear that I was very concerned that I get a low transverse incision and that I hoped to go on to have more children and so they better be careful of me! The doctor was very kind and said that they would definitely do all they could to keep my body in good condition for future pregnancies.

The room went into a whirlwind of activity. I was getting an epidural, having my IV redone, signing papers, drinking nasty sour stuff to neutralize the contents of my stomach. Oh…and having contractions. The OR was brightly lit. I hated being in there and going numb and not having my husband with me. They were shaving some of my pubic hair. Everyone in masks. It made me feel like I was in outer space or something. But I had to do this for my baby. Hubby was then allowed into the room and the surgery began. It wasn’t long before Isaac was out. Hub exclaimed, “He’s breathing, honey! He’s pink! He looks great!” Then our baby was passed off to the NICU team without anyone having the decency to even let me look at him.

That was so painful. I was so saddened by that, I couldn’t even form the words to ask to look at my son. It seemed like it should have been so obvious to one and all that I needed to see my baby—the one I was sacrificing myself for! And yet nobody seemed to notice.

Isaac Elijah. 2 1/2 lbs. 13 inches long. Miracle baby.

Hubby went along with Isaac and ran back and forth to tell me what was going on. He was breathing and surpassing the NICU teams expectations. He did not need a ventilator or a central line. He was going to be a low-maintenance preemie.

The surgery was finished up with me being given some heavy drug that knocked me out for hours. I had never consented to such a thing and am still really bothered by that to this day. I can remember being so desperately thirsty and not being able to ask for water or ice, nor to reach for it myself, nor to find the call button to get help. My husband was off to the NICU to supervise what was happening with Isaac (which is exactly where I wanted him to be).

I later found out that when the doctors removed the placenta they found the real source of our problems in the pregnancy. I had a 50% abruption. It was along the back where I guess it could not really be seen by the ultrasound.

Knowing about this abruption has brought me peace about having agreed to the cesarean. If I had gone on to labor and attempt a vaginal birth it could have cost me my precious baby, and possibly even my own life.

The following pictures were taken when Isaac was about 1 week old.

I

Kangaroo care

Feeding through a tube

Isaac spent 40 long days in the NICU. I could tell you a lot of things about those 40 days.

I could tell you how awful it is to be in so much pain after surgery that you can’t even hitch yourself up to see your tiny baby who is inside of a plastic incubator.

I could tell you how bad it is to not be able to hold your baby for the first 5 days of his life. And I could tell you of the joy of finally getting to hold my baby and getting to feel **just a little bit** normal during that short first hold.

I could tell you how utterly sad it is to have strangers determine how long you can hold your baby for….and how soothing it is to get an experienced nurse who knows that my baby does best next to my skin for as long as possible.

I can tell you about the outrage we felt as so-called experts wanted to inject our just-born 2 1/2 lb, baby with a hepatitis shot because I did not have labs proving that I did not have it. (My husband battled this one while I was unconscious, and our son did not get poisoned by those people.)

I could tell you about pumping my breasts around the clock to be able to feed my baby. And the joy of having way more milk than he could possibly use.

I could tell you how I felt to be on a death walk every day as I left my 3 older children with friends, to go to the hospital, and then felt like dying again as I had to put my baby back in his box so that I could go home again. I could not be what I wanted to be to any of my children! Misery.

I could tell you how utterly awful it feels to have to walk away from your baby and leave him with a nurse who has been referring to other tiny babies as “spoiled brats.”

I could tell you how sad it is to not have been able to protect your baby from someone giving him the wrong medication.

I could tell you about the day that I decided to keep on trusting God only because the alternative was too painful for me to deal with.

I could tell you of the joy of walking out of that hospital with my tiny 4 lb. son and bringing him home where we could give him love and protection all day long…. Of the joy of seeing my older children meet their baby brother for the very first time….

Together for the first time.

I could tell you about the joy of finally getting my baby to nurse after 3 months of pumping….and the sadness of losing my milk supply completely when I became pregnant a few months later.

And now Isaac has been with us for 15 months. He is a wonderful, healthy, happy, smart, and loving boy. Despite his hard start in life, I do believe that he is as secure and happy as any of my other children. Our new baby is due at any time now, and I am hoping to reestablish my nursing relationship with Isaac once I have milk again.

Going through this experience with Isaac has given me a whole new understanding and appreciation for life and for understanding that things do not always go as we think they should. I am sure that I am now a much less judgmental person and more compassionate to those who have found themselves in situations where they were stuck choosing between two very poor alternatives. I don’t think I will ever be quick to assume why someone is bottle-feeding their baby ever again. I know I will never experience pregnancy the same way again, as I now have seen and held a tiny little guy who should not have been in my arms for 3 more months. My husband and I have grown so much through our experience with Isaac’s pregnancy and birth. I hope we never have to endure anything so difficult again.

I am so thankful to have laughter each day with my precious gift from God, Isaac Elijah.

Photographer Dierdre Ryan was generous enough to share her birth story here with us. You can visit Dierdre’s photography web site here.

i have multiple sclerosis, while i am in pain most of the time all day long and suffer from extreme fatigue, depression, cognitive problems and occasional weakness, my husband and i were determined to have a natural birth and we chose to use Hypnobirthing.

even though my estimated due date was sept. 10th, jayden was ready to come out into the world during deirdre’s 38th week.
i delivered naturally, with no pain medication using my Hypnobirthing breathing and relaxation techniques at Good Samaritan’s in Los Angeles, CA.

i was induced while still 2cm on Aug. 29th, and apparently was walking around all week with surges. dr. dwight was concerned about jayden’s limited movement, as she has been extremely active, and the fact that eating something sweet, and she didn’t move hardly at all was a concern. so he told me to go to maternity, where there was a room waiting and to start on an IV of antibiotics and extremely low dosage of pitocin. not what we wanted, but it was medically necessary. since arriving at the hospital, i was allowed to eat whatever and whenever i wanted. since my pregnancy was picture perfect with no morning sickness, etc. i do not get nauseated, so even on the pitocin, i was fine

i was 4cm dilated the next day and my waters were broken by my doctor. i had no idea that i was that far, there was no pain. around 5cm dilated, that’s when the surges started to come closer and stronger, but i said that the pain was manageable.

i did say “uncle” 30 minutes later, but by that time it was too late. i went from 5cm to fully dilated in about 30 minutes afterwards. jayden came out with only around 6 pushes.

i was walking around and eating a full lunch after everything was done. we went downstairs to post-partum, and enjoyed our daughter. on Aug. 31rst, we were all ready to go home, since i was doing well and jayden had no jaundice, eating fine, sleeping and had her first bowel movement, we got the ok to be discharged.

in the end, the Hypnobirthing was the reason that i did so well, i gave birth with no pain medications, with david, our doula by my side all day and night, and my mother was also there. we believe that for these reasons we were able to go home early.

here is what jayden’s name means: jayden(hebrew for God Has Heard) milagros(spanish for Miracle, also her mom’s middle name) Amalurra(basque for Mother Earth/deirdre has basque in her family).

to find out more about Hypnobirthing go to www.hypnobirthing.com

-deirdre

**Many thanks to Marla, who generously shares her birth story with us. Marla is expecting her second little bundle of joy later this year…hopefully we’ll get to hear about birth #2 too!

Want to share your birth story here? Send it to me at erica@TheBabyBoutiqueAtWombsWindow.com!

Here’s our tale of a fabulous birth, in a nutshell!

My first child, Stella was born nearly 2 years ago.
My husband and I attended a 3-hour/night, once a week for 8 weeks birthing class that we loved.
The instructor had kind of a mellowed out Bradley Method approach, with natural birth as the goal, but which educated us to be prepared for an emergency situation and plan for how we would want that handled, etc. IT was SO helpful and informative that my husband has now been known to get into conversations with strangers and has encouraged them to read and find a really informational class, learn about natural birth, and what-have-you…I often want to warn people that they need to request the condensed or EDITED version…

One of the instructor’s excercises in a prenatal yoga class that she also led, was to do kegel excercises, and as we relaxed the muscles, she would always say: “…and release, release, release your baby…relax and release your baby…” THis was one of the most helpful phrases and mental images I had in Stella’s birth. I was able to really think, while pushing, and contracting, “RELEASE”…which I believe was the reason my last stage of labor went so quickly.

The other great tip, was that when you feel a “burning” pain- it is your skin stretching…so when I felt that, I could tell my midwife, and she massaged the area, while (though seemingly impossible at the time) I stopped pushing during those contractions, and ended up with no tearing whatsoever.

I Do credit God, and through His guidance, our amazing midwife, Marcia McCulley with our beautiful and incredible birth experience…

She encouraged me to STAY home for the 2 days I labored, and when I DID go in after my water broke, our exhausted, worn bodies were greeted by candles, soft music, a warmed bed and a totally homelike environment in her birth center…but it was better than home- she had everything we needed, and an assistant that massaged and kept me hydrated, and kept my husband fed and watered:-) !

The only real struggle we had was my daughter’s wide shoulders…but due to some body maneuvering and my midwife’s saavy direction, strong and focused yet calm demeanor, we brought out our sweet angel in a little under an hour!

We were able to snuggle and hold stella, nursed immediately, and were home 3 hours later!

Hurrah!

Cheers! to midwives everywhere- who face great hardship and more than their fair share of persecution, in order to help women and men bring their children into the world as they wish and with safety and confidence!!! May they continue their work, uninterrupted, and free from struggle.

I’d add a little soap-box here, too-
If you do have a midwife, or are unable to access one, due to legislation, support them any way you can!!! Our dear midwife is facing unsubstantiated claims against her (by a local hospital that is very anti- midwifery), and legal struggles that she WILL prevail in- due to ALL claims being FALSE, but must endure and PAY for the legal work, court dates etc. ALl of which ( which is surely the plan- to tap you dry of funds and energy, and run you “out of town”) takes its toll on her work , and financial resources, not to mention, personal peace, and the joy she takes in doing what she does best. We as mothers are free to have our children in any way we chose, but those who help us are penalized?! What about the “land of the free?”

ok….I’m done .

More and more men are taking their role as daddy very seriously. There are many Internet sites dedicated to new fathers and helping them to navigate through the challenges. Member sites just for new dads are filling up quickly and daddy’s rush from work to attend their child’s nursery school event or soccer game. Never before has there been such an interest in hands on parenting in new fathers.

In the past, the majority of fathers were delighted with the new baby on the way, but coolly waited out the pregnancy not getting too involved except to assemble nursery furniture and attend birthing classes with their partner. Most only became involved when their child was old enough to interact with them.

Women bond faster with the new baby for obvious reasons. Mothering and nurturing come naturally to most new mommies, with a little common sense thrown in. Mothers learn to be a mother from the moment they are aware they are pregnant. It’s their job to take care of the baby in their body and that caring naturally continues after the birth.

Unfortunately, fathers don’t experience what mothers do. They have to learn to parent after the baby arrives. Suddenly they are expected to know how to be a father. They’ll draw upon their experiences growing up with their father and most will parent exactly as their fathers did. This can be good or it can be bad.

During the pregnancy, the mother-to-be is busy recording every thought, feeling and wish into her pregnancy journal. This process allows her to reflect and to plan how she will mother this new child. This process puts her far ahead of the new father when the new baby arrives.

It’s time to level the playing field and help the daddy-to-be bond earlier with his new child. Mothers can help by:
* Getting daddy to answer some of the questions in her pregnancy journal
* Have daddy record an audio for his new child of his hopes and wishes
* Write letters to his child during the pregnancy
* Have daddy think about how he was raised and how he wants to raise his new child

Too many children have grown up not knowing their father. It’s not natural for most men to verbalize their emotions or to record them. Our children have an intimate keepsake from their mothers. It’s time we help new fathers into fatherhood and assist them in bonding with our children during the pregnancy. Take a look at these wonderful tools for fathers and families as they welcome a new addition into their home!

In the beginning of your pregnancy, you’re consumed with excitement and you feel beautiful. It seems like the upcoming months will last forever as you plan, shop, decorate and bond deeper with your husband. You can’t imagine forgetting one moment of this exciting time. But just to make sure, you dutifully record every precious moment in your pregnancy journal along with the receipts and special mementos you’ve collected.

You’re pregnant and your emotions change all day long; excited, anxious, happy, sad, feeling beautiful, feeling fat. These feelings not only change all day, but they become stronger and different over the months as your baby grows inside you. Those emotions of feeling beautiful at the beginning of your pregnancy will change to emotions of feeling fat once you’re into your sixth or seventh month.

Finally the labor begins and you’re whisked off to the hospital or birthing center and your pregnancy journal is forgotten. You’re now concentrating on the labor and wishing it would be over. What a way to cap off a wonderful pregnancy, writhing in agony or thankfully medicated as the contractions take over your body. At this moment you can’t think of much you’d want to remember, except maybe those special moments with your partner.

Suddenly you are giving birth, your new baby has arrived and your wonderful new life is starting. You and your partner exchange emotional thoughts that will be remembered forever. These are moments burned in your memory to be shared in later years when your family is grown.

While you wrap up the labor and delivery those first few days, friends and relatives call and some stop by to view your baby in the nursery. You form a special relationship with your doctor and the nurses and other new mothers. As you drive your new baby home and safely nestle him in his new room, there are more special memories. From now on, everything you do is a special memory.

These are the times you want to record as a family keepsake. Your pregnancy journal may not leave much room to record the events that come after the delivery. You’ll want to have a new scrapbook ready or a new journal just for the labor and delivery. You might overlook giving birth as an event needing a special keepsake. Of course, you’ll remember the major special moments, but as the years go by, you will forget the minor events. You may have a video of the birth and of course, you’ll have many photos of the labor and delivery, but these don’t record your special thoughts and emotions that only you experienced.

When your new baby is grown and ready to commit to a family of his own, you’ll be asked a lot of questions about his birth. Imagine how wonderful it would be to have your keepsake to provide all the details you otherwise would have forgotten. This is a keepsake that will warm the heart of your now grown child as he/she realizes how special it is that you put so much time and effort into this keepsake.

Make plans early in your pregnancy to record these cherished memories of giving birth. These wonderful journaling tools are a great help–check them out here!

Today we have a homebirth story from Melanie. You can read more about Melanie at her blog here, or go check out her home business here.

My story starts on Monday (labor day). That late afternoon/evening I started having some fairly regular contractions through that afternoon and evening. They were regular enough to wonder if they would be the real thing eventually but not strong enough to know it was the real thing. By the evening they had died down some so I decided to try to sleep like normal. I had called my midwife just to let her know. I did end up going to sleep and sleeping well through the night and woke up without contractions in the morning. Tuesday I didn’t have contractions and not too many on Wed. Thursday I again had quite a few, but not any different than Monday. During this time my parents were up in WI where my brother lives. They were visiting him and ready to come down to our house (in MN) whenever I called that I was in labor. I also had my 2 midwives coming when in labor, a doula, and my mother-in-law coming to help out with the kids while I was in labor. So anyways, again the contractions went away by bedtime on Thursday so I went to sleep again. Thankfully they always went away during the night so I slept really well.

Friday I did start off having occasional contractions from right away in the morning so I did let Leland know at work just in case. Sometimes they seemed gone but occasionally I would get more. We had planned on having some good friends over for supper Fri. They have 4 kids similar ages to mine and were bringing pizza with them for all of us. (Papa Murphys take and bake) So anyways, my friend called late afternoon to check on what pizzas to get and to ask if it was ok if they camped overnight in our yard. I had actually thought of having this friend at my delivery possibly so we thought, maybe I’d be in full labor at night and then she could come in and be with me during labor. Not too long after that my husband called saying he was on his way home and shortly after that I started having stronger contractions more regularly that made me think I must be in the start of real labor. My friend called around 5:15 saying they had been running late and were now finally on their way over. I decided not to say anything about being in labor and just have them come.

So my husband gets home and I tell him I’m in labor, and my friends get there at around 5:45-6:00 and I mention to them that I’m pretty sure I’m in labor for real. She and her husband are like, Oh this is just wonderful and were totally happy/excited etc. and I’m just thinking, I don’t know how I’m going to cope with 9 children ages 7 and under running around and was trying to figure out how things were going to work out. I hung around with them a bit while they got the pizzas baking and the kids went outside and got the tent set up. Unfortunately it was probably in the low 60’s and really windy so it wasn’t great weather to be outside or anything. Finally I decided I had to escape and go away somewhere so I got my husband’s attention to come upstairs so I could talk to him. I was in quite strong labor with contractions every 3-4 minutes or so. So I told him I needed to get away and hide upstairs and I would call his mom to come and my doula to come so I knew she would be there with me. My husband said he’d get the supper thing taken care of and them come up to be with me so that the kids would be fed and all.

I was coping fairly well, though the contractions were quite strong/painful. I also called my midwife to inform her I was in real labor finally and all. She told me to keep her posted. I think all this was around 7:00 or so. I also ate an egg which my midwife suggested as I was kind of hungry from not having supper. My doula got there at around 7:30 or so and I moved downstairs to my bedroom as the kids had gone outside and I figured this would be farthest from them but in my own surroundings. I had originally planned on laboring & delivering in our big family room that looks over the lake and has our queen-sized bed in it. But with everyone around so much, I felt better hiding out in our room. So my doula brought the birth ball and I pretty much spent the rest of my time leaning/lying across the birth ball on the top of my belly.

By 8:00 or so, I was occasionally having contractions 1-2 min apart but those contractions weren’t as strong as if they went 2-3 min apart. Then they were VERY strong. So we called the midwife back. It was funny - I had my doula call her. When she called her the midwife asked how far apart my contractions were and my doula said, the last few were only about a minute or so apart and she started to continue saying something and the midwife had already hung up the phone to run out the door She lives about 20 min. away from here and called me back on her cell phone from the car to talk to her. I did talk to her on the phone between contractions for a short time. By this time I was doing a lot of moaning which I felt helped a lot. My husband was in there more then too and would massage my low back kind of hard with each contraction. I wasn’t having back labor, but it definitely helped. I also started to feel queasy during this time. Whenever I’m in strong labor I get shaky and cold and queasy and end up throwing up.

My midwife arrived around 8:30 and the first contraction after she got there I threw up a few times through that and the next contraction. I still felt a bit queasy after that but that feeling gradually went away enough that that was the only time I threw up thankfully. The contractions after that were getting quite strong. Somewhere around the 8:00 time, my husband was in and out a bit to give a game-plan for getting the kids in bed. Most of the time he was with me though. I told him to get them in bed early so at least they would be put in their rooms. My 2nd midwife arrived about 10-15 min after the first. They encouraged me to go to the bathroom because I hadn’t. It took me a bit to get up my courage to get up and walk out there knowing I’d have a really bad contraction during that time. Thankfully I got that done with ok with only 1 contraction during that time.

After that I was having the really hard contractions pretty close together and started saying the typical transition-type statements. I don’t think I can do it anymore , this had better be transition because if I’m not very far along I can’t make it etc… I just remember with my oldest, I was in really bad labor that where the contractions were doubling back on each other and I had vomited but I was only dialated to like 4 at the time. So I kept hoping that wasn’t the case and I really was almost done. I also had never noticed my water breaking so occasionally worried that it would break and things would actually get worse than they were But finally around 9:15 or so, I started feeling the urge to push and mentioned it to my midwives. They checked me and said I was complete and could go ahead and push.

So in everyone’s birth stories I read, they seem to say how much better it felt to push and the contractions were so much better once they could push etc… So I was expecting to feel much better with the pushing stage and then I get these big, hard contractions and I said to my midwives, these contractions are not better like everyone says they are - they hurt just as much But at least I was excited to know it wouldn’t be long as I never have long pushing stages. I just stayed there on the birthing ball and my midwives got everything ready. It was probably only 3-4 contractions of pushing before she was crowning. The only negative about pushing and delivering in that postion on the birthing ball was that I couldn’t see anything that was going on. My midwife asked my husband if he wanted to catch the baby and kind of encouraged him to. With prior deliveries in the hospital, he has gotten kind of queasy and almost thrown up a few times, but with her encouragement he hesitantly agreed. So the burning was pretty bad with crowning - could feel it all the way down to my toes. But then that part was over soon. My husband held her head while they worked on getting the cord away from her face and easing her shoulders out and he caught her as she came out. As soon as she was out I asked her if she was a boy or a girl and he told me a girl It was such a relief and excitement that she was born and was a girl.

They eased me back into sitting leaning against the birthing ball and put her on my chest while they wrapped her in a towel. She had a little too much mucous to nurse immediately. She cried vigorously right away for quite a bit before she settled down. The placenta was delivered probably 5-10 min. later. After that they got me up into my bed. My mother-in-law had been out nearby outside one of the bedrooms while they went to bed. All the kids had gone into their rooms and my husband had mentioned to her before Jemma was born, that it might not be too long and she should stay around in case she thought about going home. After she was born, Cody heard her crying and came down to check with Grandma and then they all ended up back out of bed in the kitchen area which isn’t too far from our room waiting around to see her. So after I got back into bed, we called all the kids and everyone in and they all got to come up on the bed and see their new baby sister and see mom. They were all pretty excited and happy to see us. They ended up staying up until about 10:30 or so.

My parents arrived about 10:15 so they got to see Grandma & Grandpa too before going to bed. My friend came in not too long afterwards (she had been putting her kids to bed in the tent and never thought I would have delivered the baby already), and was amazed to see me there with our little girl already I don’t think she every truly realized how serious of labor I was in when they got there - it was pretty funny Grandma & Grandpa were excited to see Jemma as well. Jemma did start to nurse somewhere during that time when the kids were there and nursed well for quite a while. Then after the kids went to bed and I had seen my parents, I went and took a shower which felt good to get completely warmed up and over my shaky feeling. Then they got me set up in the other comfy bed in the living room and I got to visit with my parents and take pictures and then my husband, my friend and I hung out and talked for a while before we went to sleep. So that’s our exciting birth story of #6!

Melanie

Many thanks to my online buddy Kathleen for sharing her sweet birth story.

On September 26th 1999, we celebrated my husband’s birthday, a day early. I was not due with our first until October 24. My brother called to say hi. I recalled saying to him…. It’ll be soon. He said ya they all say that!

We went out for a quiet evening on September 28th. Around 1 am September 29th, I felt like my water broke. But nothing was going on and I didn’t want to go to the hospital too soon. So I waited until I was sure and that something was going on. About 3:30am I woke Mark up. He rolled over and said “ ya right” . Then sat bolt upright in bed and said really??? … okay I’m up.

I had everything ready to go. We went to the hospital. They didn’t believe that I was in labor. I was at 4 cm and 80% effaced. Until I threw up all over the nurse that was checking me in… she realized very quickly that I was in transition. They admitted me. I sat in the whirlpool for about an hour or so. Then insisted I had to get up and go to the bathroom. The Nurse checked me and discovered I was fully dilated and baby was descending. He was coming!

So they did all they do, I was a first time mom. I let them lead me too much. The Dr was attempting to cut me to ease the baby’s arrival. Mark about decked to DR, insisting that his wife did not want that! GO MARK!

At 7:11 Wednesday September 29, 1999 after about 20 minutes of pushing…. Lucas Graham Visscher was born. He weighed 7# and 4 ounces. He was 20 inches long. He was fine for a bit and then they felt he had a breathing issue. Since he came so quickly he had what they called “wet lung” and was in what we called his cage…. For a few days. On that Saturday we were able to take our first born son home. My parents drove from Pennsylvania to Michigan to see their daughter’s firstborn child. Mark’s parents were in the same town and were very shocked When Mark called Wednesday morning to say we had a baby! It was very tense for a few days there but things did smooth out and our son is now over 7 years old, lost a tooth, but more importantly than any academic or physical change… he has accepted Jesus into his life and we can see he has a tender heart towards things of God.

Before we knew it we were excited to discover we were going to be parents of 2. that story is yet to come… and so are a few more:)

Kathleen

Many thanks for Jackie for sharing her birth story with us!

The shortened version of my birth history:
-First section was an emergency and I believe it was necessary. They tested the blood in his cord and it had not been circulating.
-2nd section was after a trial of labor and ended up being ‘Failure to Progress’, or as we know it “Failure for Doctor to be patient”. I wish I could go back in time to change this decision…
-3rd and 4th sections were scheduled. I went in to my first pre-natal appt when pregnant with my third all ready to try a VBAC and basically got laughed at. I wish I had done then all the research/soul-searching I’ve done this time.

This pregnancy and leading up to it:

So, after 4 children, we thought we were done….my hubby b/c he was just done and me b/c I didn’t think I could deal with any more c-sections. After the last section, I kept saying, “I can’t do this anymore….” But, in my heart, I knew that I was not done having children…there were more ‘out there’ for me. I began looking into adoption and fostering, but didn’t have hubby’s total support there, either. Finally, after a long while….(all of our children are about 2 years apart, but this baby comes almost 4 years after our youngest)….we let go of it all and put it in God’s hands. We would let Him give us more children. And then, if He gave us the child, then He could deliver this child the way He made me to….vaginally. Believe me, its been one long walk of faith!!

We got pregnant right away after that decision, but that started the turmoil for me. I so wanted to gestate in peace, but that really didn’t happen. I immediately contacted several midwives in my area, only to be turned down by all of them. One was really nice and spent a ton of time with me on the phone and gave me lots of advice. But, she said even though she believed I could VBAC, she didn’t want her fears to affect me. So, I was ’stuck’ with my OB. (About halfway through my pregnancy, I ‘met’ online a traveling midwife who was willing to attend me. Well, after all this, my hubby tells me he’s adamately opposed to spending that much money on a midwife. [and we really didn't have the money- It would have meant taking out a loan.] Nice he should tell me that then. We fought about that for much of the rest of the pregnancy. Our insurance doesn’t cover midwives, but totally covers OB/hospital births. So, “Thank you” to that midwife- you know who you are- she was very helpful, as well. Next pregnancy, I’m saving up for a midwife!)

I continued with OB care, being a “good little patient”, pretending that I was having a 5th section. My plan for most of the pregnancy was to stay home as long as possible in labor and show up ready to push and refuse a section. Or if things were feeling comfortable, to stay home and deliver baby.

Of course, they scheduled my section for a week before my due date….I stated that I wanted to go into labor on my own and then show up for the surgery….we had several confrontations about scheduling with my doc and the surgery scheduler. I couldn’t deal with the stress anymore and just wanted to quit going to the doc for the last few weeks. Well, my hubby, being the honest person that he is, wanted to tell my OB the truth about our plans. I knew very well what his reaction would be, but that was what we did. At 38 weeks, we told my OB (of 12 years) that we were planning to VBAC and not planning on having another section. He flipped, of course. I basically got yelled at for 15 minutes…called selfish, stupid, irresponsible…told I could die, baby could die, I had a 15% chance of rupture (which is not at all true)…on and on. I hate confrontation, had been sick to my stomach for days, dreading this encounter….but it was done. He dropped me from his care…although, he knew he had to care for me for 30 days.

I had been given the name of a doctor at the beginning of my pregnancy, who I was told was supportive of VBACs. Well, I hadn’t called him earlier b/c he’s further away, and connected to a much smaller hospital and I figured he’d be supportive of a VBAC after 1 section, but no way after 4 sections. Well, now I had nothing to lose, so I gave him a call. I had to fight my way around the receptionist and his nurse, who both said I was too far along for him to take me. I begged them to just run it by him, have him call me, talk to him directly. They did and he agreed to see me on his day off, no less! He says, “I figure you’re an adult and can make this decision (to VBAC).” I’m thinkin’ “Yes! That’s what I’m talking about!” So, he agreed to attend me (at the big hospital nearer to me where he has priveleges). We got along great, but at our 2nd appt had a few disagreements. We agreed on: he doesn’t like to break womens bag of waters, he rarely does episiotomies, and he told me several times to stay home in labor as long as possible-that he didn’t want to see me until I was at least dilated to 5 and I’m liking him alot. But, then, he says that Pitocin is safe for VBAC- yikes! and he is all for epidurals….hmmph….well, I guess he can’t be perfect, huh?

The labor and birth of Josephine Ellyn (finally, I know, I know….thanks for reading this far):
I had weeks of contractions every night, wondering if they were for real….but then finally on Monday, Oct 16, they started for real. (I was a week overdue.) I had a NST in the morning, which I really didn’t want to go to, but was trying to cooperate with the Dr., since he was working with me. She reamed on my tummy to wake up baby 3 times and I wonder if that’s what made my water break just a couple hours later. I went to the bathroom that afternoon and had some bloody show and then I started leaking amniotic fluid everytime I changed positions. Yay! I was finally going to start something! Contractions started that afternoon, but sporadic. I called hubby to pick up something for supper b/c I didn’t feel like cooking. Contractions continued all night, but not super close together. I called several people to have them pray. (Note to self: don’t call people when you think you’re in labor. LOL ) But–the ctx were just close enough to keep me awake all night.

Tuesday morning, we decided to have hubby stay home from work b/c I was having to breathe thru the ctx and they were hurting. We got the kids all ‘farmed out’ that afternoon. From noon until about 7:30, the ctx were 3-5 minutes apart and quite intense. Greg filled the birth pool and I got in it around 5:00. Well, after eating a huge piece of pizza LOL and being in the pool for a couple hours, the ctx petered out again. Argghh! (We had called the doc earlier in the afternoon just to let him know we were in labor, but were going to stay home awhile.) The ctx were sporadic the rest of the evening, but just enough to keep me awake most of the night. I would lay in bed, but while laying down, the ctx were excruciating, so when I would have one, I would roll out of bed into a kneeling position, breathe through it, then get up to go to the bathroom and then back to bed…all night long, about every 15 minutes. Ugh…..

Wednesday morning, we got up around 5:00 a.m. b/c we were sick of not being able to sleep and wanted to get things going….so I tried walking around the house for awhile and doing nipple stimulation…this would keep the ctx coming. The doctor called around 7:30 a.m. and says, “How ya doin’?” ha ha ha… He wanted me to come to his office to see if it really was my water that broke and not other discharge and to check my progress. He was really hoping that it wasn’t my water b/c he truly wanted to leave me alone. I liked the idea of going to his office better than going to the hospital, which my hubby was pushing by this point. So, we went to his office. Yes, it was my water that had broke (which I was quite certain of) and I was only dilated to 2….ugh…. He sent us back home and said, “lets meet at the hospital at 10:00 tonight, if things don’t pick up by then” to get me started on anti-biotics. I had tested positive for Group B Strep, also and the dangers of infection rise when the water breaks. I wanted to refuse the anti-biotics, but found out the hospital would test/treat my baby as if infected if I refused. And the doc was being pretty cool considering my water had been broken for more than 48 hours by that night. After leaving his office, I contracted quite regularly for several hours and was excited that it might really be happening….but once again, the ctx petered out. I was able to rest a little Wednesday afternoon between ctx. I found that standing during them was the most comfortable. For some reason, ctx were excruciating when laying on my side and a little better if I was kneeling. I had my hubby start squeezing my hips during them.

And, can I just say how annoying it was to have a washcloth/towel between my legs for 3 days b/c my water was leaking….ugh…..

Finally, Wed night arrived and we went to the hospital to meet my doc and get my anti-biotics going. We were sent to OB triage. The first nurse there that I had was the only one to give me a hard time about VBACing. She was quite surprised that any doctor would ‘let’ me VBAC. But, from then on out, all my nurses were super supportive and no one gave me a hard time about VBACing. I don’t know if my doc had told everyone to leave me alone or what, but I was pretty much left alone.

Upon arriving at the hospital, my doctor recommended starting on a low dose of Pitocin. (Because of my water being broken for so long and laboring for so long.) I didn’t want it to come to this….my doctor and I had had the Pit discussion in his office. He believes that the smallest dose would not increase the risk of rupture. (His belief is that cervical gels are much more dangerous than Pit) He said at that point the risk of infection in baby was much greater than my risk of rupture. Group B Strep added to the water breaking risk. I asked for a few minutes to talk with my hubby to make a decision. I broke down and cried…I didn’t want any interventions….but we decided to start a Pitocin drip. He started it very very low- 1 unit (whatever measure they use- I don’t know.). I have a friend that was a L & D nurse there with me later in labor and she was very happy to see how low he kept the Pit….she said she would be closely watching my IV b/c there were “Pitocin Monsters”, posing as nurses and doctors, out there. She said some women get all the way up to 30 units of pitocin. I was never given more than 2 units.

The ctx started up immediately…my body was very ready, obviously. I labored from 11:00 p.m. til 7:00 a.m. with the Pit only increased to 1.5. When they increased it to 2, the ctx were too close together, giving me and my uterus no time to rest, so they lowered it. I was handling the ctx o.k. My mom was there, along with this friend and my hubby. Around 4:00 a.m., my SIL came. They all took turns holding my hips during ctx. I was hooked up to the monitors the whole time, but I had agreed to that, so long as I could be in any position I chose. My friend was so surprised that the monitors were picking up the heartrate with all the moving I was doing. God was answering my prayers, that was for sure. My hubby even asked if we could walk the halls for awhile and the nurse said “Sure, after I get 20 minutes”. I was so surprised. Ends up, I didn’t feel like walking b/c the ctx were intense enough. We did unhook the monitors quite often to use the bathroom. The baby’s heartrate was doing splendidly during ctx….we were all so glad to see she was tolerating labor so well.

The hardest part was that I was only comfortable standing. I had so much pressure in my bottom that I couldn’t sit. (Tried the birth ball, stool and couch) And it still was horribly painful to be laying down. I would try to lay down between ctx to rest, but then by the time I got to a standing position during a ctx, I would somehow be ‘behind’ on working with the ctx, so it seemed much worse. So…for 8 hours, I stood on that hard hospital floor. We had the bed raised way up, so I could lean my upper body on it during ctx. Between ctx, I swayed, walked, peed, etc. They finally made a pile of bed pads to cushion my feet.

At this point, I finally decided to get checked. (No one had pressured me to be checked up to that point) I hated that decision….its like you want to know if its good news, but don’t want to know if its bad news. So, after 8 hours of very good ctx, she checked me and I was only dilated to 4. Oh my, I was so upset. I thought for sure I was in transition b/c I had begun shaking and saying “I can’t do this!!” and I felt like I had a bowling ball between my legs!! I starting balling. That is that point where I decided to get an epidural, even though I hadn’t wanted one. (I was trying to do everything to be as safe as possible for my scarred uterus. And I knew by getting an epidural, I’d no longer be able to feel if anything was wrong.) But, I was SO tired. I hadn’t slept since Sunday night and it was now Thursday morning. I know I could have kept going if I wasn’t so tired. And I was physically tired from standing for so long- I just wanted to lay down.

So, the epidural was put in..I was able to rest! Awhile later, maybe 9:00 ish, her heartrate started dropping to the 60s and 70s during ctx. You know how doctors usually just come in at the end to catch baby, well my doc came into our room (he was in the hospital the whole time I was laboring b/c he is from further away) and hung out with us for several hours, watching the baby/monitor. He says, “We need to get her out quite soon” He knew how badly I wanted a VBAC and he worked with us. Any other doc would have sectioned me b/c of the decels, the water broken for so long, etc. He kept checking me, saying I needed to be complete soon, so he could get her out. He told me it would be a forceps delivery. We were able to talk about it for a bit…how experienced he is with forceps, etc. He only mentioned surgery once….but I knew it was always on his mind and ours. (The decels were a major flashback to our first labor/section) Once I was dilated to 8, he basically stayed at my bottom to ‘encourage’ me to dilate….I think he was manually dilating me. He then said that he wanted me to try pushing on the next ctx. I think I was dilated to 8, but hubby thinks I was 9. Anyways, around 10:00, I started pushing. The doctor was trying to turn her also, because she was posterior. Ugh…just one more thing ‘against’ me. She was not descending that was the major problem he kept saying. He couldn’t use the forceps until she was lower and she just wasn’t dropping. I volunteered to get on my knees, but he didn’t think that would help. I couldn’t do anything else b/c of the epidural. I asked about letting the epi wear off, so I could get up, to get her to drop, but he said “You don’t want me doing the forceps without the epi”. She finally was low enough and he had turned her enough to get her out with forceps. Just before she was born, I hemmoraged a ton- I lost alot of blood. (My hemoglobin was 6.3 the next day, which is dangerously low.) He was worried that it was my uterus rupturing or the placenta abrupting. (Found out later that my placenta had partially abrupted.) It was pretty intense and scary for those few hours. Hubby and doc were worried about me (I didn’t know I was bleeding out) and I was worried about baby. I kept saying “come on baby, come on baby” between pushing…that’s all I could think. My friend was right at my head, praying for me and quoting Scripture verses. Well, finally, at 12:35 p.m. on Thursday, Oct 19, after years, months, days and hours of fighting, our beautiful daughter was born vaginally!! She was 8 pounds, 11 ounces, 20 inches.

And she came out screaming- praise the Lord! (The cord was up by her head, getting squeezed during the ctx. That’s why the heartrate decels.) For the first time in 5 births, my baby was placed up on my chest immediately after birth- what an awesome thing!!

I then starting feeling faint after she was out. I spent the next hour or so on oxygen and flat on my back and/or side. I was so weak from losing the blood. I was able to nurse her and hold her for just a bit. And hubby cut the cord. But, the first hours weren’t ideal b/c of my faintness.

I ended up only having 2nd degree tear(s), which I was quite pleased with after all the trauma. And he didn’t have to do an episiotomy.

She was born 10 days after my ‘due date’ and 17 days after the original scheduled c-section. (She would have been a tiny baby, maybe with breathing problems.)

I hesitate to give an OB so much credit, but my doctor really made my VBAC successful. Any other doc would have sectioned me several times over in those few hours. He worked with us b/c he knew how much it meant to us. (But, of course, I know it was because of the power of my great God!) I was able to joke after the epidural was in, for someone to take a picture of me hooked up to every known intervention that I didn’t want! LOL Unfortunately, with all the events that took place, the interventions happened…..water breaking 3 days earlier, GBS+, labor stalling, cord up by her head, posterior position, no sleep for 3 nights, etc, etc. But, none of that was b/c of being a VBAC, so I’m encouraged for the next time.

I am very glad we went for the VBAC- I don’t regret it. I’m encouraged that my uterus stayed intact and that I now have a ‘proven’ pelvis. I think this will open up my options for a midwife and homebirth next time. And hopefully, all the things that happened this time won’t happen the next time around. (I want to know how to have like a 6 hour labor, with 2 pushes and baby’s out! LOL)

Love, from Jackie and baby Josie, who will know someday how special her birth was

Amy was kind enough to offer her birth story to us for a read. Check it out here.

This birth story has been shared by Cerise who owns www.coMOMities.com.

Before and during my pregnancy, I relentlessly researched all of my options for pregnancy and childbirth. After much consideration, we decided to have a homebirth with a midwife. I felt really good and healthy and had an easy, uneventful pregnancy. In fact, the most difficult part of my pregnancy was the constant criticism we received for the decision to have a homebirth. Although the comments were hurtful, I tried not to let it bother me too much as I firmly believed that this was the absolute best choice we could have made.

As a good prenatal yoga student, I took to heart Anne’s mantra of “the average first time pregnancy lasts 41 weeks and 1 day.” When people asked if I thought I would go early my response was “No, I’ve had it way too easy. I’m sure I’ll go way past my due date and be good and miserable at the end.” Needless to say I was shocked when at 36 weeks and 1 day I felt a trickle and gush of my water breaking! I was in disbelief, but I didn’t know what else it could possibly be. The water continued to trickle, so I called our midwife. She was also surprised, but was pretty sure from my description that my water had indeed broken. Since it was around midnight and I’d had no contractions, she said that she would check on me the next day. She gave me instructions for reducing my risk of infection and staying hydrated so that my amniotic fluid would continue to replenish itself, and told me to call if I started having contractions. The next day, I still felt fine other than the strange sensation of the trickling water. So, I went to work and started making preparations for my maternity leave. This whole time I only had two main concerns: would I make it to my shower on Saturday and how was I going to take care of everything I still had left to do at work?

Our midwife came that evening and at that time I had only had three mild contractions. In fact, I didn’t even know they were contractions until I described them to her. Candace assured us that we would be fine. In fact, she said it was good that our baby was taking his time since my water had broken before 37 weeks. She said that he needed time to get his lungs ready since it was so early and not to worry if it took a few days – this was a good thing. I still felt great the next day and had a lot of adrenaline to wrap up my duties at work. I took care of everything I needed to and left work at the end of the day feeling that everything would be okay without me.

That evening I began having more intense contractions. They started out pretty far apart then got closer and closer together. When they were about 7 minutes apart I called our doula, Anne, and our midwife to give them the heads up. The contractions were manageable, so Anne and I decided to wait an hour and check back in to see if I needed her then. After that, they slowed down to being 30-60 minutes apart. They were just intense enough to keep me up most of the night. Friday, my husband and I stayed home from work to rest and shop for some last minute things just in case we had to cancel the shower. My contractions continued at the same rate and intensity, so we decided to go on with the shower. The contractions definitely became more intense during the shower, but I was able to interact without anyone having a clue as to what was going on. The interaction and activity was enough of a distraction that I could get through the contractions a little easier. So, when my husband’s friends suggested going out to dinner afterwards I was ready to keep up the distraction. I talked to our midwife while we were there and she said that if our baby didn’t come that night, that we could try some natural induction methods the next morning.

When we got home from dinner, the contractions became much more intense. They were getting much closer, 15, 12, 8 minutes apart, but not in a predictable pattern. I kept thinking I was in the first stage and that it could still take 12 hours for me to have this baby. I began to doubt my ability to do this naturally. Suddenly, I had an extremely painful contraction. It felt like his head was coming down and I felt an extreme urge to push. I was afraid to push because my contractions were still mostly over 10 minutes apart, so I couldn’t possibly be fully dilated. After a couple more contractions like that I called Anne and told her I definitely needed some help. I knew something was happening so I called our midwife too. She agreed to come and check me, but said that if she did we had to have this baby soon because there would be risk of infection after doing an internal exam. I told my husband to go ahead and start filling up the birth pool – I wanted to be able to get in it as soon as I could! By the time Anne arrived I couldn’t sit or lay down anywhere – there was a huge bulge on my bottom and I felt like I was sitting on my baby’s head! Anne arrived and helped me through a few contractions. Candace arrived shortly afterwards. She said that we would have to empty the pool because it probably wouldn’t be warm enough by the time I was ready. She watched me have one contraction, and then we went back to the bedroom so she could check my dilation. She checked me, looked at Anne and said, “I need you to help him get that birth pool ready now! She’s complete.” I felt this immediate sense of relief! She told me I could reach down and feel my baby’s head! Candace called her apprentice and rushed to set up her equipment. Anne and Craig rushed to set up the pool and I felt relieved that the end was near.

When the pool was ready, I got in and completely relaxed. I didn’t have another contraction for at least 30 minutes, maybe longer. I had a few more contractions, but they were 10% of the pain I had experienced before getting in the pool. During those contractions Candace told me how to push with them to open myself up. She put the mirror in the pool so I could see the little sliver of baby’s head with each push. I pushed again and felt an intense pain as more of my baby’s head came out. Candace and Anne reminded me to slow down and not force it too quickly to reduce the chance of tearing. I tried to breathe deeply, pushing gently and relaxing between contractions, but everything seemed to happen so fast. I think I pushed about 3 more times and my baby’s head was out. Next thing I knew his body was coming out and he was in my arms! I immediately felt this intense love for my baby and couldn’t believe I was actually holding him. I was amazed at how well my husband supported me throughout my entire labor and delivery. I felt extremely peaceful as my husband and I held our new baby during his first moments of life.

I am so grateful that I trusted my body and my baby enough to plan a homebirth. My birth confirmed my belief that it is most important to trust your body and your baby — they are the true experts when it comes to childbirth. I’m so glad I didn’t listen to everyone who criticized my choices to have my baby at home, to go to work when my water had broken and to continue being active during my labor. My baby’s entrance into this world was absolutely perfect!

Many thanks to Shelly Clemons for sharing this birth story with us. You can visit Shelly’s home business here.

Erica, here’s a copy of the story I wrote about the birth of my son - we’re
now expecting #2, and the baby in the story is 3 years old.

Saturday, November 22, 2003
On Wednesday, August 20th, Craig took me in for my first internal exam. We
were both excited, as I was nearing my due date; this exam would tell us if
there were any progression at all, and maybe how soon I would be rushing off
to the hospital.

It started pretty uneventfully, really. I had to pee in a cup as usual,
then get weighed and get my blood pressure checked. My blood pressure was
running high that day, so Amy, the nurse, told me she’d come in after my
exam to check it again. After waiting around, Dr. Schwartz came in and
started my exam. It really was more fun than having my earlobes burned, but
that’s about it, really. He told me I would probably experience some
spotting throughout the day, but there was no real progression. I think I
was 1 cm dilated, and 50% effaced. Amy came back in to check my blood
pressure, only to find it was still high. I was sent to a cozy little room
at that point, where I was hooked up to a monitor. It basically was a large
rubber band wrapped around my belly, with a monitor attached near where
Brandon’s heart was beating - we were making sure he was moving normally,
and everything was okay in there with him. (I believe the test is normally
called the “Non Stress Test” or NST). I was hooked up to the monitor until
almost 3 PM - and the doctor hadn’t been running late that morning. We were
getting nervous, not only for Brandon’s well-being, but also because Craig
had scheduled a job interview that afternoon for 1 PM. (He missed the
scheduled time, but was able to go in later.) After being in that chair for
several hours with Brandon wiggling around as normal, we were released, and
I was instructed to take it VERY easy, and drink a lot of water.
Later that evening, Craig and I decided to go out for what may well be our
last dinner together before the baby was born - first, to celebrate what had
been a great interview for Craig (though he didn’t end up getting the job),
and also to celebrate the impending arrival of Brandon. We decided to go to
The Cheesecake Factory at 119th and Metcalf, because we didn’t want to wait
around on the Plaza, and I wanted to go to Wild Oats afterward, if I had
time. On the way, we invited Craig’s parents to join us, since it was near
their house. It was around 7:15 or so in the evening when we left for the
restaurant. It was a hot, hot day, as had been most of the summer. So hot
that you could nearly cut the heat with a spork. Or something like that.
Anyway, I had been miserable, because our air conditioner wasn’t cooling the
house well, and I was stuck resting upstairs, where it was the hottest, so
as not to endanger my health, or Brandon’s. I was happy to get out and
drive, even though it was that hot. The car was certainly cooler than our
house!

When we got to the restaurant, I made my ritual journey to the bathroom.
Our wait was going to be about ten minutes, so I figured I’d get that part
taken care of first. I went in to the stall farthest from the door, and
emptied my bladder. I was about to get up when I realized that there was
still liquid coming out, and it wasn’t urine. I waited a minute, figuring
it would pass; when I realized what was happening, I dug out my wireless
phone and called Craig. He answered by asking me what was going on; I had
been in there a good while. “Craig”, I said, “I think my water’s just
broken.” I’m sure the panic ensued out in the lobby; being stuck in a
stall, I wouldn’t have seen it. Rather than waiting in that stall and then
bolting out, I pulled up my shorts, locked my legs together as tightly as I
could (how that would help, I’m still not sure I know) and waddled into the
next stall, where I drained myself a little more, before repeating the above
process two more times. As I got to the door, the hostess came in to see if
I needed anything. I guess Craig was worried, and asked her to check on me.
I told her I was fine, and bolted as fast as I could waddle (legs tightly
together) out the door. We met up with Craig’s parents halfway to the exit,
where Craig said “Hi and Bye” to them. They followed us out the door,
worried that something terrible had happened. As we got out the door, I
told them my water had broken, and I was trying to get to the car as quickly
as I could, because there was a towel there that I could sit on. At this
point, my shorts were fairly soaked. And I hadn’t even gotten to eat any
cheesecake!

Once in the car, I called Dr. Schwartz first, to find out if I needed to
head to the hospital. I told him that my water had broken at 8 PM, and he
asked me to head to the hospital, just to make sure. After speaking with
the doctor, I called my parents, then called our doula, Kim Oursler. I let
them all know that I would be heading home first, to finish packing, then we
would go off to the hospital. I was to call everyone when we left our house
to head to NKC hospital, since we were so far away from home, and weren’t
quite finished getting everything together. Craig’s parents were going to
get some food, and then meet us at the hospital. My mother must have called
about five million times before we even got home; she called another eight
million once we were home, before she finally decided she would just meet us
at our house, because she just couldn’t wait. She wasn’t in the least bit
impatient!

When we got home, I decided I should take a shower, because I wasn’t sure
when I’d get to next. I should’ve gotten something to eat, too; of course,
I didn’t know that I’d go without food for nearly three days. Ahh, yes,
hindsight certainly is 20/20. My parents and brother all showed up at our
house right before I hopped in the shower - they were all more nervous than
Craig or myself, so they were all ordered to just sit down and stay out of
the way. We finally headed to the hospital around 10 PM on the 20th. I was
more hot than nervous; even though it had been a cool shower, the heat and
humidity of a Midwest summer still really got to me. By the time we got to
the hospital, I felt like I needed another shower!

I (fortunately) had the sense to pre-register in June, so all I really had
to do was check in with registration, answer a few questions, and then, we
were off on what would prove to be a longer journey than any one of us had
anticipated.

My memory gets fuzzy at this point, because of all of the commotion, so I
may forget a few major and minor details. We got up to the 7th floor, and I
got into the lovely house garments. There is nothing better than a hospital
robe when you’re leaking everywhere to make you feel good about yourself.
The night nurse had to verify that my membranes had indeed ruptured; perhaps
they’d had cases of women filling themselves with water to fake it before?!
We found that I was correct, my water had broken, and it really hit us -
Brandon was on his way! I was hooked up to another monitor, had a saline
drip inserted, and the dance began.

Unfortunately for both Brandon and myself, my labor never really
progressed. I never got more than 2 cm dilated, I think, and I think I was
about 50% effaced. We started my Pitocin drip around 2 AM of August 21st,
to induce labor. I’d not even had any contractions up until that point, but
once the Pitocin kicked in, it was a different story. The contractions
started coming regularly, but nothing was really happening. They weren’t
unbearable until later that night, when they really cranked up the Pitocin.
I spent a good amount of time on Thursday trying to walk the halls (with a
towel between my legs; I was still basically a fountain!) or bobbing around
in the tub. I also got on the “peanut”, an odd, peanut-shaped birthing
ball, and got into the rocking chair, but nothing seemed to help Brandon
make his way into the world. I’ve got to admit that Kim, my mom, and Craig
were great throughout the whole thing, except when they got hungry. Yeah, I
told them about hungry, that’s for sure. At this point, all of the hours,
minutes, even days started running together. At some point, Dr. Schwartz
had the Pitocin cranked up so high that I was having one major contraction.
I don’t know how long it lasted, only that it was nearly the most
excruciating pain I’d ever felt. I was crying and trying to hard to get
through it, knowing I had to, to make sure Brandon would be okay. I
remember that Kim was urging me to try to walk it off, or try the birthing
ball, but I kept telling everyone that I just wanted to rest in bed, on my
side. (Come to find out, Brandon was not in the correct position for birth,
anyway; he was face-front, instead of back. Dr. Schwartz had me try laying
on my side, turning my belly to the mattress as best as I could, to try to
turn Brandon into the proper position. I think he turned some, because I
felt some pain from that, but I never found out for sure. Funny how my
instincts guided me throughout the whole process.) My mom was just trying
to make everything okay. Craig was around somewhere, doing something -
mainly I think he was just holding my hand. Craig’s parents, my dad, Sean,
and Boe came in and out once in a while, but didn’t really stay too long,
once things got real intense. Maybe because I kept threatening to show them
my butt?

Dr. Schwartz was coming in, talking about epidurals and C-Sections. I was
in intense pain, but didn’t want an epidural, because I was afraid of what
it may do to Brandon. I’d spent so much time trying to make sure Brandon
was healthy while I was pregnant, by avoiding taking most anything when I
got sick, and that sort of thing, that I didn’t want to introduce an
epidural if I didn’t have to. I still wanted to try to have him naturally,
and be able to move around.

My family was concerned, however, and the tension you could cut with a
knife. Everyone seemed to be upset with the nurse except Craig and I; we
both knew she was only doing her job, and what the doctor wanted. After
having a meeting with everyone, I decided I would let them give me a dose of
a mild antihistamine that night; it would help me sleep (which I hadn’t
really done in a few days) and it would help me get through the pain. I was
nervous about the antihistamine shot, but it was only a small needle in my
left thigh - the nurse administered it during a contraction, so I barely
noticed it. The fun part was that the monitor I was hooked up to not only
let us hear Brandon’s heartbeat throughout our pre-delivery stay, but it
also showed the amount and intensity of my contractions. I remember crying
on Thursday night because I was hot and tired, and I wanted a shower; the
doctor agreed to let me shower and then get my shot. I think getting a
shower actually helped more than the antihistamine did; I apparently had
longer, more intense contractions throughout that night, but slept through
every single one of them. Everyone was impressed with that feat. I was
just glad to get some sleep.

The next morning, I awoke feeling a bit more clarity. I knew I was starting
to get concerned for Brandon’s well-being, as he was rolling around in my
belly without any water, and it had been 2 ½ days. Craig and I talked it
over, and we decided since I was still not past 4 cm, I would have a
C-section. I was told that Dr. Schwartz would be able to get me in around
11 AM on Friday, the 22nd, so early that morning, the nurse stopped my
Pitocin drip. If only I could get her to bring me some food, but I
couldn’t. The only thing I’d had was a bit of orange juice Kim snuck to me
the day before, which I’d thrown up later that day during my non-stop
contraction.

The nurse came in around 10:30 or so to start prepping me; I got a nice,
cold shave in my nether regions, and Craig got dressed in his scrubs. I
think they had to bring in a larger size, mainly because the shoes wouldn’t
fit! I think I had a goofy hat on - at that point, nothing mattered except
bringing Brandon into the world. I was wheeled in, and I’m pretty sure Dr.
Schwartz had some pretty bad jokes to tell (he always did!). There, (in the
sub-arctic room) I met my anesthesiologist. He walked me through the
epidural procedure, telling me of all the risks, and what exactly they were
going to do. Craig wasn’t allowed into the room until they were ready to
start slicing me up, so he watched the epidural being administered through
the little window. It really didn’t hurt like I thought it would - it was
only some pressure in my spine. Craig told me there was a lot of blood.
Once the epidural took effect - and it was pretty quick - they let Craig in,
and got ready to start the procedure.

One of the nurses turned on the radio; the song playing was something by The
Backstreet Boys. I told them I wasn’t going to stick around listening to
something that sucked, and that my baby was going to need some rock and
roll. They turned it to 98.9; I forget what song was playing. By that
time, they were cutting me open and flinging stuff around. I remember
smelling burnt something, only to realize it was probably me as they cut me.
I could see some of what they were doing in the reflection of the light
above me, and I could feel that they were wiggling my abdomen, but that was
it for me. I was behind the drape. Craig, on the other hand, got to watch
the whole thing, which seemed to take only a few minutes. At 11:43 AM on
August 22nd, Brandon Austin Clemons was born. The doctor took him out and
briefly showed his gooey, blue face to me over the drape. In what would
become normal habit for Brandon, he drooled baby-goo on me, just missing my
face. How precious! Craig tells me that when they placed him on the table
to clean him and warm him, he grabbed the blanket and started chewing on it.
That’s something he did pretty frequently, and something he still does.
When Brandon arrived, his eyes were wide open, and he was taking everything
in. From the start, he was a nosey baby, in everyone’s business. We knew
right from the start he was going to be an active baby, and probably quite a
handful. We were right. He was also a natural at breastfeeding, ready to
suck on just about anything.

We were overjoyed with our little one. He was 7 pounds, 2.3 ounces, and was
20 inches long. He was so cute, even with his temporarily cone-shaped head.
It seemed, though, that his respiratory rate was too fast, and cause for
lots of worry. On Saturday night, our nurse took him into NICU to run some
tests and keep a better eye on him. He stayed in the NICU until Wednesday,
August 27th. He suffered from respiratory distress, which made his
breathing irregular, sometimes very fast. It’s apparently common in babies
born by C-section, as they’re not squeezed through the birth canal, getting
the fluid out.

We finally had our baby home. It was a big adjustment for all three of us,
but well worth it. We have now a happy, healthy three-month old little boy,
who surprises us every day with his intelligence and humor (not to mention
his diapers!) Neither of us can imagine life without him. He really is
precious. But don’t tell him we said that, he’s already a character.

Here is another great birth story from Karen Clark of Story Time Felts.

At about 9:55 am the nurse checked me and I was 3
cm, 75% effaced, and baby was at a -2 station. Finally we got the
Cervidil put in at 10 pm, along with a hep lock IV, which I was upset
about! It hurt, and I couldn’t move my hand as well. I tried to
refuse it but was told that sometimes the Cervidil can make
contractions come on too strong and they need to be able to
administer meds in a hurry. Whatever! I accepted it but I didn’t like
it.

At 11:20 they finally let us get off the fetal
monitor. I hated being tied to the bed! It was such a relief to get
off of that thing. The shift changed and we got a new nurse, Gail,
who had been our nurse the night we came in for the false alarm,
which was nice! She was great, very quiet and calm and laid back. She
told us we can go walk around for a bit, see what happens, but not to
wear ourselves out and make sure we get to bed soon (Greg was going
to have to sleep on a mat on the floor in the tiny room). She said I
was scheduled to have the Cervidil removed at 6:00 am and unless
something happened before then, she’d just leave us alone till
morning. So we went walking at 11:30 pm and called our parents. We
told them it didn’t look like much was happening, I hadn’t dilated or
anything, and only had a few contractions now and then. We told them
to go ahead and go to bed, and we’d call if anything happened through
the night otherwise they’d hear from us in the morning when I was
going to be checked again.

At 12:00 midnight we gave up on the walk. I had a
few contractions but not much so we decided to rest up and go to bed.
We turned on the jazz station again and relaxed. Greg slept really
well but I was a little wired! Started to have some hard contractions
every 5 minutes or so, but since I had similar ones at home for the
last couple weeks, I didn’t think anything of it.

At 2:20 am on Friday, I went to the bathroom and
the Cervidil insert fell out! I called the nurse and she said don’t
worry about it, just try and get some sleep now. So I laid back down
and Greg fell back to sleep. I, however, could not sleep! The
contractions got much harder and closer together, and I had to do
some deep abdominal breathing to get through them. Greg was snoring
away in the dark and I was pacing my breathing to his snores - I
could get an average of 10 deep breaths in for every contraction!
LOL! He had no idea what I was going through but I did not want to
wake him up, we were both so tired and I knew we’d have a long haul
ahead of us.

At 3:55 am I went to the bathroom and could hardly
get through the contraction on the way back. Greg woke up and asked
if he should call the nurse and I said not to. But he insisted when
he saw what I was going through! She came in a checked me and I was
100% effaced, 6 cm dilated but baby was still pretty high. She said
she could feel the bag of waters and was going to call my midwife,
Suzie, and see if she wanted to come in. In the mean time she sent
someone to prepare a labor/delivery room for us. It took them about a
half hour to get the room ready, so we spent the time sitting and
breathing through the contractions. When it was finally ready they
wheeled me into the new room on the bed, and it was very
uncomfortable, the contractions were getting really hard! At this
point I did not think I was getting that close, it certainly was
bearable, and the deep breathing was really helping. The only problem
was I was getting dizzy and had pins and needles - I was
hyperventilating! By the time we got to the new room (Room 1 - the
Good Room!) the nurse got me a paper bag to breathe into which really
helped. I also was feeling very hot and had Greg massaging my face
with a wet wash cloth, then would breathe into that during
contractions. It was great!

At 4:05 when we finally got to the new room they
checked me again and I was a complete 10 cm with just a rim of cervix
left! I couldn’t believe it and made them repeat it again and again.
LOL! I was confused! It was happening so fast. Greg hurried and
called our parents to get down there, that we’d be pushing soon! My
bag of waters still hadn’t broken so the baby was high but I was just
starting to get some contractions that felt like more pressure, like
I’d be wanting to push soon, but I could breathe through them and not
push yet. They called my midwife, Suzie, and I really wanted her to
be there for the birth so I tried to slow things down. But the
contractions were coming right on top of each other, tripling up! It
was hard to stay focused but Greg and the cloth, and the paper bag,
really helped! It was awesome. Every 3rd contraction I had a chance
to breathe and think and I was just giddy! I was so excited that we’d
be seeing our baby soon! I could not wait!

The pressure during contractions was getting so
strong, I started to get scared! Suzie showed up I guess around 5 pm
and sort of watched me, helped me through a few contractions,
encouraged me to go to the bathroom, etc. She kept telling me that if
I felt like pushing to go ahead and push, that would help get that
last rim of cervix taken care of. I did push a little bit here and
there, while walking to and from the bathroom, but I didn’t want to!
Finally at 5:20 am she decided to break my water, as it was bulging
and probably keeping me from being really effective at pushing (and
it didn’t help that I was trying to not push because I was scared of
the pain!). We all knew that as soon as my water had broken, things
were going to speed up! Greg wrote down in our notes:

5:20 am Broke Karen’s water

5:30 am She’s pushing!

5:40 am He has a head!

5:42 am Terry Jay Clark 9 lbs 15 oz 22″
long

I will never forget the feeling of touching his
head. I was laying on my side in the bed with one leg in a stirrup,
still only pushing when I absolutely could not stand not to. Suzie
kept saying it’s OK not to push, let the baby decide when to come
out. He would come whether I push or not. I loved that! I never felt
pressured or ordered around, I could just listen to my body and let
the baby come when he was ready. When Greg told me his head was out I
looked down and saw him and reached for his head. I couldn’t stop
saying “I want him! I love him! I want him!” It was amazing, this
soft squishy head! In a couple big pushes, he was all out and since
my hands were still down there I just pulled his hot, wet, slippery
body up onto my chest and held him and rubbed his back and told him
how much I loved him! I will never forget that feeling!

When his head came out, apparently it was
bluish/purple and Suzie was concerned that he needed oxygen so she
had Greg cut the cord earlier than we would have liked. Shortly after
he cut the cord though, Terry started crying and pinked up a little
more so she didn’t need to take him away. I was so thankful! Turned
out his face was just bruised up quite a bit, as if I had rammed him
into my pelvis bone on the way out or something! Poor thing! But he
looked great and had Apgar scores of 8 and 9. They let me hold him on
my chest for the longest time, I was so happy and in love! Greg had
tears in his eyes and we were just so happy!

We had no idea how much he weighed, but I guessed
he was smaller than the girls, he just didn’t seem that big to me.
Even Suzie said maybe 8 and a half pounds? Finally we couldn’t stand
it any longer and asked them to weigh him. The scale said 9 lb 15 oz
but no one could believe it! The nurse turned the scale off and then
back on again and sure enough he WAS that big! Wow! Greg rushed out
to tell the parents waiting outside and show them some of the first
pictures, while Suzie waited for my placenta, and gave me one stitch
“just in case.” She said it didn’t look like I really needed it, the
laceration was so small, but I said go ahead! I was so relieved that
I didn’t tear much, especially with such a big baby, what a nice
surprise!

At about 6:30 we finally let the girls in to meet
their baby brother. He had been crying almost this whole time and
when they came in and started talking to him, he stopped! It was
awesome. They had magic sister stuff! It was beautiful to see them
marvel at their new brother. We were all so in love! Shortly after,
the grandparents all came in and we celebrated!

I feel great, baby checked out great, and we got
to come home at about 11am on Saturday. Overall it was the best birth
yet! Greg was an incredible support and took all my grabbing and
pulling and yelling in stride. My midwife Suzie was incredible as
well. I loved the entire experience and am so glad it went the way it
did. Thanks for all the encouragement everyone - and patience waiting
out those 13 overdue days!!

Today we get to enjoy another birth story from Karen Clark of Story Time Felts.

Tuesday the 29th of July was spent walking all
around the National Museum of Naval Aviation here in Pensacola, in
hopes of getting things going. I had been having prodromal labor for
3 weeks now, and was 4 cm and 50% effaced for about a week, and I
just had this feeling that if we were to walk and not stop, things
would get going! So we spent the day there, came home, had dinner
then went out for another walk outside. Contractions were coming
about every 5 minutes, which normally would be really exciting but I
had been having them like that for a long time and it didn’t mean
anything. I took some camomila and laid down for a nap at about 5pm,
and at about 6:45pm, I woke up with a really bad cramp…During the
contraction, I was talking to the baby, telling her to make it a good
one because I want to see her so bad. All of a sudden during the
contraction I felt a “pop.” Got a little nervous thinking it was my
water breaking, but nothing happened so I went back to sleep. When I
woke up about 15 minutes later and went to the bathroom I saw that I
was spotting some light pink/orange disharge. I was SO excited! It
kept coming over the next hour or so along with a little mucus so I
knew I was having a “show” and losing my plug. I tried not to think
“this is it” but it was hard! We got take out stuffed baked
potatoes for dinner, and I kept wondering if this was my last meal!
Then later that night, Mom and I decide to go for yet another walk,
and this time things were different! It was about 10pm when we went
and every contraction I had was getting more and more painful. I had
to stop and breathe through them and they were coming about every 3-4
minutes, lasting over a minute each..

I debated whether to call the hospital…Mom
encouraged me to and of course that made me not want to! So I
decide to go do some email and chat a while. Mean time Greg had gone
to bed with Fallon, not really suspecting anything since we had been
through this so many nights before. I went to chat with my friends at
ParentsKitchen and it was so fun! I was having increasingly more
painful contractions, and really starting to feel like this could
really be it. Of course everyone in there was really nervous that I
was sitting at home chatting instead of going to the hospital but I
knew the last thing we wanted to do was get to the hospital too
early. I started timing them again and they were at exactly 4 min
apart lasting over a minute each, some even 2 minutes, for over an
hour.

Finally at 1am I had some *really* painful
contractions and they talked me into calling. I call the
Labor/Delivery, tell them I think I am in labor and that we will come
in about an hour. I go wake up Greg who has this look on his face
like “What the__?!?!” and it takes me at least 5 minutes to get him
to get up! I had him take a shower and start getting our stuff
together. Meantime the contractions are getting a lot more painful,
tho still about 3-4 min apart. We both get the feeling this is it now
and start to get so excited!! I wake my Mom who decides to come sleep
in the living room on the couch so she can answer the phone, and we
agree that they will just bring Fallon in when she wakes up in the
morning. I was disappointed that Fallon would miss the birth but she
had had a *very* long day and was so cranky I couldn’t see her
getting much out of it if she had come. The drive to the hospital is
only 5 minutes but Greg and I talked the whole time about what we
thought the baby would look like and how excited we were that this is
finally happening!! All I could think of was thank GOD that I didn’t
let my Dr talk me into inducing!! I was just in heaven knowing my
body DID know what to do on its own and that we had a shot at the
birth we wanted.

So we got to the hospital around 2am. They do an
exam and tell me I am 4cm and decide to do an U/S to check the fluid
levels. My OB hadn’t been called yet–they wanted to make sure I was
in labor first. By this time I knew I was but wanted as much time as
possible so I didn’t mind that they hadn’t called her. I didn’t like
the Dr that was checking me–just didn’t seem to know what he was
doing–either that or I made him nervous. Anyway fluid level was
only 15.8 where it had been 24 something the day before…but I
didn’t question it since anything under 18 is supposed to be normal
and I was glad it wasn’t anything alarming. They monitor me for about
30 min on the EFM and baby is doing *great* no decels at all,
contractions are every 4-6 min lasting 1-2 min each. I am feeling
them very stongly especially way down low.

Doctor decides to not call my OB yet and to let me
go walking for 2 hours around the hospital, and tells me I am not
technically “admitted” yet. The plan was they would check me again in
2 hours and see if I made any “progress” and go from there. It was
now about 4am. The walking part was fun. We were the only ones on
every floor we went to…just walking around and stopping every
couple minutes to have a contraction or use the restroom. I felt
GREAT in between them and they were painful but bearable. The
trippiest part was when we found the chapel. I got to try all sorts
of positions there on the kneelers and pews.

At about 5:30 I decide I can’t make it the whole 2
hours. The contractions gradually got a lot stronger and closer
together. Some of them seemed to only have about a minute between
them which really started to scare me. So we decide to head back.
They do an exam and we were *blown away* to find that I was already 7
cm!!! I could have kissed the Doctor. All of a sudden everything got
very *real* and we were both so jazzed!!! We knew we would be seeing
our baby soon now!!

At this time the contractions started getting
really intense and I was only getting a minute between them. I was
getting nervous because I couldn’t really relax with them so close
together. We hang in there though and Dr Roman arrived about a half
hour later. She checks me again, and we talk a bit about the threat
of cord prolapse. There had been some concern that if my waters had
broken, with the baby’s head not engaged (it still wasn’t) that the
cord could prolapse. She tells me she is very concerned about this
and wants to do something (forget what its called) where she inserts
a catheter in the amniotic sac to release just a little bit of the
water without breaking the bag. I agree to have this done, but I have
to admit I was scared!! She described it as me having to hold my legs
up high and still while she did it and all I could think of was NO
WAY could I do that!! The contractions were SO painful. She also
explains that they will have to wheel me into the delivery room to do
this, just in case it turns into an emergency situation. This also
means getting an IV which I hadn’t wanted (didn’t even have so much
as a hep lock till this point) but I know it is necessary. Trouble is
it took 4 tries and 2 blown veins to get it in right. :-/ They
finally get the IV in and we go to the delivery room where my OB
explains the procedure again but adds that I should be prepared for
it to turn into an immediate c-section if the cord falls down as the
water is released. I got really scared at that point, looked around,
saw there were at least 10 people in there, all looking quite
concerned, hear them talk about the anesthesiologist getting there
etc. etc. It was very tense!! The Dr kept asking if I was ok and I
just kept saying I just want to see my baby, I didn’t care as long as
she was ok. I was crying because I was worried but I knew this meant
we were getting close to her. I was having bad contractions and kept
telling them to wait but they kept saying no it’s good to do it
during a contraction (!!) so I just pictured little Alia and went
with it. The Dr. took a syringe to poke a hole, but evidentally that
didn’t work so she then took something like a catheter and did that.
But instead of it releasing a little out, the whole thing broke open
and gushed (I didn’t know this till just now when I asked Greg how it
went!).The water was clear and he said the water gushed out about 3
feet all over the doctor and there was a slight panic as she had her
hand in there making sure the cord didn’t fall down. I kept asking is
the baby OK??? I was frantic but everything was fine. The baby
engaged right away and the coast was clear. They cleaned things up
and wheeled me back to the labor room.

We labored a while longer. I really have no idea
how long…I just know things got *very* intense fast after the water
had been released. The baby was fully engaged and I went to 9cm in
what seems like no time. The pain was incredible and I was still
double peaking and getting no break in between. It was incredibly
difficult to relax!! The only thing that worked was closing my eyes
and deep breathing while picturing Alia’s face. Somewhere at 9cm I
started to get that irresistable urge to push. It was SO strong I was
blown away! I had never had the urge with Fallon so this was
something I had looked forward to. I was really disappointed to find
I was only 9cm still, since I had been determined to not push till I
was complete since I think pushing too soon contributed to the
shoulder dystocia we had with Fallon. But then the Dr said I had an
anterior cervical lip and that she could probably get rid of it if I
pushed through a few contractions. She said my bladder was full and
asked if she could insert a catheter to empty it. I thought to myself
“What’s a little more pain on top of all this?” and agreed. They
inserted it, let it drain, then took it out. It was then that they
brought me the squat bar. I had wanted to squat for delivery but by
now I was in so much pain I couldn’t imagine changing positions (I
was sitting) but I knew squatting would make things happen faster so
I did it. It only took 2 contractions to get rid of the lip, but that
was not fun! The Dr had her hand up in me the whole time!

At this point I was so incredibly inwardly focused
I don’t think I opened my eyes the whole rest of the time. I was in
severe pain but I had a mission to accomplish! I remember feeling
another push coming but decided to sit back down for it since the
squatting was way more painful and I was feeling like I was losing
control. I don’t really remember what happened once that lip was
gone, but next thing I knew I was REALLY burning and everyone was
panicking!! The baby’s head was crowning and they were yelling at me
to stop pushing!! This one nurse was hee hee heeing at me to get me
to pant and not push and I was just screaming “I can’t stop!!”
What was going on was that because of the previous
shoulder dystocia with Fallon, they wanted to be sure that when I
actually delivered, it was in the delivery room, not the labor room.
So I guess when they saw me crowning, they weren’t ready for it. They
had to unhook all the monitors and things, put the end of the bed
back on and who knows what else to get ready to wheel me into the
other room. I was in so much pain I couldn’t believe they were doing
this to me! It took *forever* to do this!! By the time we got in
there though they had me feel her head and I was in HEAVEN!!!!! It
was so soft and squishy and hairy!! It was an awesome feeling!! It
seemed like it took forever again for them to rehook me up to
everything and fix the bed back up. I remember panicking because
there was no where for me to put my feet!! I was yelling at them to
get me something to put my feet on! I think they couldn’t find the
end of the bed or something. Anyway one more contraction and I pushed
the rest of her head out then another one and she was all out!! Greg
says now that I wasn’t actually pushing when her body came out, that
the Dr helped her out but that’s not how I remember it!! I remember
giving a big push and out she went! I asked the Dr about how it
went and she said that at one point the baby started getting sucked
back in and she was worried about the shoulders getting hung up but
thankfully they didn’t! Whew! I was SO relieved when she was out! It
was an incredible feeling!! I was in heaven and kept saying to Greg
“Can you believe it?!?! She’s here!!!!” She was GORGEOUS and
looked every bit like the baby I had been picturing during my whole
labor. They couldn’t place her on my tummy because her cord was
too short and I was really disappointed! I *ached* to hold her! But
they let Greg hold her after they said something like “Well unless
you want us to cut the cord too soon…?!?” and I said no! He held
her while they waited on the cord and then I got to cut it!!! It was
so cool!!! I was so thankful she had that short cord since that is
probably partly why it didn’t prolapse or get around her neck with
all that fluid in there.

She was born at 8:26am on Wednesday July 30th. I
asked one of the nurses how long I had been pushing (since I had NO
clue! I was so out of it!) and she said only 11 minutes! That was
awesome!! I had pushed for 2-1/2 hours with Fallon!

I finally got to hold her and look at her good. I
was just in awe!! She was beautiful, all slimy and coated in vernix
and her eyes were wide open staring at me!! I immediately put her to
the breast and she did so good!! She sucked so strongly for a whole
20 minutes!! I was truly in heaven!! Sometime while I was nursing her
and they were stitching me up, I delivered the placenta. All intact
and no problems with it or the cord. Then a nurse comes and says some
family is here to see me. I was SO happy!! My Mom and Dad arrived
with Fallon not 15 minutes after the baby was born. They came in
while I got stitched up and went with Greg while the baby went to the
nursery to get cleaned up. I don’t know what happened in there but I
was glad Fallon got to be a part of it.

Baby Alia weighed in at 8 pounds 15 ounces and
21-1/2 inches, had apgars of 9 and 9 and was so healthy and alert!!
All I could think of was how glad I was that I didn’t let my Doctor
talk me into inducing!! We did it and it was incredible!! It was a
*lot* more painful than Fallon’s birth and I really felt like I
didn’t handle it as well as I could have, but given the fast and
double peaking contractions I am amazed we did it at all!! Don’t know
how soon I will want to do it again, if ever, but I know how that new
mommy amnesia works!

I had some issues I needed to resolve about
Fallon’s birth and we were able to sort of undo all of those with
Alia’s. We let my body go into labor naturally, we avoided all drugs,
I waited for the urge to push, I didn’t have any leg cramps and
stayed hydrated with Gatorade, I didn’t tear half as bad (I had a Y
shaped 2nd degree this time –actually Dr said it was 2 first degrees
but has to count it as a 2nd–whereas I had a really bad 3rd degree
with Fallon’s that took 6 months to heal), and the baby’s shoulders
didn’t get stuck. In addition, we had some other nice differences
later–No jaundice and no tongue tie on Alia! My stitches are healing
incredibly well and other than the immense afterpains and sore ribs,
I feel GREAT!!! Alia nurses wonderfully and is so incredibly
alert and happy!! We are having a great time! She rarely cries and is
so interested in her big sister!!

Fallon hasn’t really grasped the whole thing
yet–my parents have been distracting her very well! I am sure we are
in for a bit of delayed reaction once they leave but I think she will
do great. When we got home from the hospital, the first thing she did
when she was alone with me and the baby was tickle her little feet,
then take Alia’s hand and say “Hi! My name is Fallon! I’m your big
sister!” I really wanted her to be at the birth, but looking back
I am glad she wasn’t. It was very stressful and intense at several
moments and I am not sure how she would have handled that–not to
mention my parents!!

Here is a great birth and breastfeeding story for you from Karen Clark of Story Time Felts.

FALLON’S BIRTH AND BREASTFEEDING
STORY

My husband, Greg, and I kept a journal the day
Fallon was born and the first few weeks of her life so I have many
details written down, but many will come from my own memory of
them…

Because of the baby’s size (predicted 10+ pounds)
and the fact that I was a week overdue, combined with the fact that
my husband’s leave would run out soon, my OB and I mutually agreed to
induce on August 18, 1994, one week after the original August 11 due
date. Since I had stayed in California for the duration of the
pregnancy while Greg was transferred to St. Louis in February, he had
flown out for a month’s leave so he’d be here when the baby came. He
came a week before she was due, hoping she’d be early or at least on
time. Since he only had a month, and 3 or 4 days of it would include
him driving my car back to St. Louis, we really felt the pressure of
time. We had the choice of waiting it out another week, but that
would mean Greg would have had to leave when the baby was only days
old and I would more than likely have had to stay on at Mom’s a week
or so longer. So we opted to induce in order to ensure that Greg
would have almost 2 weeks with the baby and that we’d have time to
make sure everyone was healthy before moving to St. Louis. We planned
on Greg driving back and my Mom and I flying out with the Baby at the
end of August.

On August 18 at 7:30 a.m. we checked in to
Petaluma Valley Hospital. The head nurse was the mother of a high
school classmate of mine, and although the nurse was a strict,
no-nonsense type, she and I hit it off fairly well because we had
something in common to talk about. Her son and I had been friends and
we shared stories back and forth. It was a good diversion throughout
the day, especially when she brought out pictures of her family. I
found out she is a real softie despite her outward appearance.
Once hooked up to the fetal monitor, I was told I
was having fairly strong contractions, but I hadn’t even noticed. I
made some remark like “Those? I didn’t know those were contractions!
They’re nothing!” I had felt very minor cramps that morning, but
nothing I’d have called a contraction. So maybe I would have gone
into labor on my own that day…I’ll never know.

At 8:10, they started the Pitocin, and by 8:20 the
nurse said the contractions were about 2 to 5 minutes apart. At this
point my OB came in and broke my water. It was only as uncomfortable
as a pap smear and I was fascinated by the amount of liquid and how
hot it was. At 8:30 they upped the Pitocin. So far things were going
smoothly and I was looking forward to the long day’s work. At least I
hoped it would only be a day!

At 9:00 I had the first really strong contraction.
It was uncomfortable, but I just made an effort to relax and it was
fine. Greg was totally fascinated by the whole thing and especially
with the fetal monitor. We were really getting excited and having a
good time! We were both in good spirits, although nervous about what
was to come. We could not wait to get our hands on our baby!
My Mom arrived at the hospital at about 9:30 and
stayed until after the baby was born. Early in the pregnancy I asked
her to stay with us during labor and the birth. Since Greg was in St.
Louis for most of the pregnancy, Mom was a big support and even
attended some of the childbirth classes with me. I also felt that
being there would give her an extra closeness to this baby that she
might not get with us moving so far away. She ended up spending most
of the time reading or looking around. Really hung back and waited.
Looking back on it, it must have been pretty boring!

So we went along throughout the day, the
contractions getting stronger and closer together. At one point they
were back to back and a nurse came in and asked why we hadn’t said
something and she turned the Pitocin down a bit. For the most part,
we were left alone all day. The nurses only came in once in a while
to check the monitor and the Pitocin, ask how I was doing etc. I
really liked that. My OB came in once again to see how things were
going. Everything was going as planned. Although the contractions
were strong, we were getting through them by doing our deep breathing
and just trying to relax. I also used a lot of visualization. I just
pictured the baby working hard to move down with each
contraction.

At about 1:30 p.m. I started feeling very dizzy
and got a bad case of the shakes. Since I tend toward hypoglycemia
and I hadn’t eaten since the liquid breakfast at about 8:00 I
suspected that was what was going on. Up until then I had been
alternating between walking around the room and rocking in the
rocking chair, or just standing, but once I started getting dizzy I
had to sit down. The nurse came in and I asked for something of
substance to eat and she went to get some juice. When she returned,
she very sheepishly said something about maybe now is the time to
consider some pain relief, or maybe something just to take the edge
off. I refused at first, but I knew I was so out of it, and thought
maybe just one shot would be all I would need to get my act together,
so I agreed. At 2 pm I had my first shot of Fentonyl, a narcotic
similar to Demerol. It lasted less than an hour, but it was just
enough to relax me and get rid of the shakes and let me focus. The
contractions were very strong and by a quarter to 3 , I was asking
for another shot. I got it and kept going. At a quarter to 4, I asked
again and I was told no it was too close to pushing. They checked me
and I was 9 cm dilated. I didn’t think I could go on but I kept
thinking about Fallon and how she would arrive very soon.

The nurse said at that point that I could go ahead
and push if I wanted to. Now, looking back, I know I shouldn’t have
because I wasn’t fully dilated and never had the urge to push that
they tell you to expect, but I was so eager to get the baby out that
I did it. Well, I ended up pushing for 2-1/2 hours. I had the most
intense leg cramps imaginable, my ribs felt like they were busting
and I couldn’t reach my legs to hold on. I was in a semi-sitting
position and I had wanted to squat. I could barely breathe because
Fallon was so high on my ribs. The pushing stage overall was far
worse than any part of labor. I have never worked so hard in my life.
In fact, it was so exhausting that I skipped a few contractions and
didn’t push because I needed a break. I don’t think this would have
been possible if I had been really ready and had that undeniable urge
to push. I was pretty oblivious to what was going on, just focusing
on Greg and the baby and pushing with all my might. Finally the nurse
said just one more and the next thing I knew Fallon’s warm wet body
was on my belly. That was the most wonderful feeling in the world! I
was surprised to see her but so happy! I held her to me and told her
how beautiful she was. She was gorgeous. She had a head full of black
curly hair and pudgy round cheeks and the cutest little lips I had
ever seen. I was amazed and I hollered out how wonderful this felt
and that I could have 10 kids! Delirious I know, but I truly felt
that overall it was not too much work or pain for the wonderful
reward I got at the end. Within minutes, Greg whisked her away to my
parents who were both sitting there in awe (Dad joined mom sometime
during the pushing). Greg couldn’t stop crying. He was so happy and
so proud. Everyone was crying, even my father. Greg brought her back
to me and I held her and looked her over some more as they began
stitching me up. Evidently I didn’t tear until the last minute and I
tore pretty badly. I asked if I could nurse her right away and they
wanted me to wait until I had delivered the placenta and they had
stitched me up.

Later on, I found out that Fallon’s shoulders had
been stuck for quite some time. I had no idea this was going on, I
was just pushing away, but my Mom said they were preparing the
Operating Room for an emergency C-Section…They were going to push
her head back in and do a C-Section because she would not come out!
What they ended up trying first was that my OB reached in and grabbed
Fallon by the arm and literally pulled her out of me during that last
push. Fallon’s right arm was weak afterward and we were instructed to
exercise it to help rebuild any pulled muscles/ligaments. Later on
during an exam we noticed a bump of scar tissue on her collar bone
and now know that it was probably broken during the birth. I have a
lot of hard feelings about that part of the birth, but am grateful
not to have had to have a C-Section. I did some research and found
that pushing too soon and being semi-sitting can contribute to
shoulder dystocia. If I had been squatting or on my hands an knees,
she may have been able to turn better and not become lodged in my
pelvis. I’m hoping to avoid that problem with my next child.
Back in the delivery room, I was finally allowed
to nurse Fallon at 7:15 (she was born at 6:38). She latched on right
away and made the cutest little sounds, like she was saying “Ahhhh
I’ve been waiting for this!” She sounded so sweet, like she was
enjoying it so much. It was the second best feeling I have ever had,
next to having her hot little body on my stomach. She fell right to
sleep after that and Greg continued to show her around the room. By
then my Grandmother and brother and sister in law were there, and a
little later aunts and uncles. All together we had almost 2 hours
before anyone from the hospital even took her away to weigh her! They
did the preliminary things in the room, but it was kind of funny
because people were getting ready to go home and no one knew how much
she weighed! I was grateful to have had so much time with her. Greg
and my father accompanied her to the nursery where they did the tests
and gave her a shot. She weighed in at 9 pounds and 4 ounces and was
22 inches long. It seemed like they were gone forever, but Mom kept
me company as I ranted and raved about what a piece of cake the whole
thing had been. She looked at me like I was crazy because I think it
was really hard for her to see me in so much pain, but to me it was
all relative. So we talked about how pretty Fallon was and marveled
at her dark, long hair. It was past her collar! Even though the
nurses and doctors all told us it would fall out, we knew Greg had
Cherokee in him and thought that it would stick. It did!

Back at the room, we held Fallon forever. We were
just so amazed. I ate and tried to nurse her again. She seemed like a
pro. I used the football position because I couldn’t get the hang of
the cradle hold right away. My breasts are fairly large and her head
kept falling down under it. It felt really awkward so I switched to
the football hold with lots of pillows. It was so easy to see her and
make sure she was opening her mouth really wide. It was the best
feeling nursing this tiny little baby. She was very sleepy and would
only nurse a few minutes at a time so I let her rest. We tried to get
some sleep but were too wound up. We just sat and stared at her for
hours! We roomed in 100%. The only time we were separated was when
they took her for a blood test in the middle of the night and Greg
was sound asleep and I was too uncomfortable to go along on my own.
Greg did go with earlier when they took her picture. Other than that
she spent the whole time in one of our arms or, later in the night
when we did think maybe we could sleep, in the bassinet. When she was
in there I had to hold her hand the whole time, or let her suck on my
finger. I don’t think I ever did sleep that night. I did continue to
nurse her every once in a while, but got conflicting advice from
different nurses as to whether I should be waking her up to nurse or
just letting her sleep. So I did both. I wanted to nurse her, but it
was so hard to get her to wake up, so I gave up a few times and she
ended up sleeping for 4 or 5 hours at a time. Between feedings, I
wore breast shells I had bought at about 8 months to help me correct
flat nipples. They worked like a charm and by about 1 week the
problem was corrected permanently.

The next day we were anxious to get home, and
after the pediatrician came at about 4 pm we were allowed to check
out. The pediatrician did say that Fallon had A- blood and that since
mine was O+ she would likely become jaundiced in the next day or so,
which she did. Other than that and the shoulder weakness, she checked
out great. We couldn’t wait to get her home to show off to
family.

At home, we had a bunch of people waiting for us.
I cried uncontrollably as we carried her in the house, thinking about
the reality of us bringing our very own baby home. It was such a
special feeling and at the same time terrifying! We shared her with
everyone and looking back I probably tried too hard to be “back to
normal” too soon. Next time I’m going to hibernate in the bedroom and
get some rest for a few days! I really did feel pretty good
physically, once I sat down! But after a couple of hours I was ready
for everyone to leave, and they didn’t. In fact mom invited everyone
to stay for dinner so I felt pressured to help “entertain.” I ended
up in tears because I wanted to visit but still wanted to just go off
with my baby and be by ourselves. So I went off to nurse frequently,
which continued to go well.

The day after we got home from the hospital, a
nurse came to visit. She checked Fallon’s temperature, asked how I
was feeling etc. We reported that all was well except that she was
keeping us up at night. The nurse advised us to try to “teach” the
baby the difference between night and day by making sure all the
lights were on and window shades open during the day and it was very
dark and quiet at night. Fallon had also become jaundiced by this
time, which we were warned about in the hospital because she and I
have different Rh factors. Before we left the hospital the
pediatrician had told us that if it appears to call her and let her
know and make sure she gets lots of exposure to sunlight. We began
undressing her and putting her bassinet in front of the window for
about 10 minutes a few times a day.

Up until 2 days after she was born, Fallon was a
happy very alert baby. She spent an amazing amount of time staring at
everyone and everything around her. She rarely cried, and when she
did I could nurse her right away and she would settle down. On her
3rd night, she began long screaming spells. We spent hours walking
her, singing to her, trying everything . It was a nightmare to see my
precious angel in such distress for such long periods of time with
nothing I could do to console her. The whole family tried to calm her
down but it would only last for 10 or 20 minutes, around the clock.
It was awful. I called my cousin who had had a colicky baby and she
recommended Mylicon drops. I also read in Dr. Sears’ “The Baby Book”
that cutting out dairy from my diet might help. I called the
pediatrician first thing in the morning and she recommended hot
baths, motion etc. and the drops if I felt they helped. We got the
drops and they did seem to help a little, but now Fallon would start
screaming when I offered her the breast. Greg had written in our
little notebook: “August 22 (4 days old) 10:00 Taking little sucks
then cries.” There are several other entries like this, where she
refuses to nurse or starts then cries. I began pumping to relieve my
engorgement because she wasn’t nursing well and my milk had come in
on the 4th day.

I called La Leche League that Monday and it was
one of the hardest calls I have ever made. I had been to one meeting
prior to having Fallon and was very comfortable with the leaders. But
the thought of calling them made me feel like something was wrong. I
got very nervous and put it off a few hours. When I finally got up my
nerve I described the situation and emphasized that Fallon would cry
when I tried to nurse her. The leader was very helpful in most things
but did say that I should try to get the baby calmed down before I
tried to nurse her, which I had already been doing. I must admit I
was a little frustrated with the leader because I kept saying that
she would start nursing and then cry and the leader kept telling me
to get her to stop crying first and then nurse. But the rest of the
information was wonderful. One of the best things she told me was to
help with engorgement, which I had for about 2 days after the milk
came in. She told me to pour about a cup of water in a disposable
diaper and heat it a little in the microwave to make a hot compress.
That way, you don’t get wet, it’s reheatable, and those little
newborn diapers fit perfectly in a bra. I still tell people about
this. I used that method to encourage a let down so I could express a
little milk to soften the breast so Fallon could latch on. Then in
between feedings I used ice packs.

By the time Fallon was 8 days old, her night time
crying spells and gassiness had subsided, which I attribute to the
elimination of dairy from my diet. She began sleeping better at
night, but was still crying at feedings off and on. By the 8th day we
were starting to get concerned because her wet diapers became less
frequent and she had gone 2 days without a bowel movement. Thinking
this was a normal progression once the meconium had left her system,
we didn’t worry about the lack of bowel movements since she was still
having 6 wet diapers a day. But on that 8th day we decided to call
the doctor and check, since it was a Friday and wanted to be able to
see her if there was a problem. When we called the doctor and
explained the situation to the nurse, she explained that babies can
go anywhere from a day to 5 days without a bowel movement and that
she is probably just getting her digestion in order. We asked could
she be constipated from something in my diet and the nurse said
probably not but we can see how it goes over the weekend. We also
reminded her about the jaundice and she recommended we swing by just
to have the doctor take a look at her. We did do that and the doctor
literally met us in the courtyard, pinched Fallon’s arms and legs and
said it looks great and then went back into the office. I was glad
the jaundice was going away but wished she had spent more time with
us. As far as the bowel movements go, at that point we figured it’s
got to come out some time so we tried not to worry. She had been
nursing for long periods and Greg had written in the journal about
how he heard her swallowing and that it sounded “like someone
drinking milk out of the carton…gulp…gulp…gulp…” so I don’t
think it ever occurred to us that she wasn’t getting enough milk. She
was still fussing when I tried to nurse her, but not every time. I
had written down that she wasn’t nursing as strongly but did it for
longer periods of time. I did check in with LLL again and got ahold
of a different leader this time. I explained about the lack of bowel
movements and that I was concerned maybe Fallon was constipated. The
leader told me breastfed babies are rarely ever constipated and as
long as she was having 6 to 8 wet diapers a day that she was fine,
that every baby is different and not to worry.

By the 11th day, we had her first regularly
scheduled post-partum pediatrician appointment. We still hadn’t had a
bowel movement so we were glad to be able to find out what was wrong,
and had visions of Fallon having to have a rectal laxative inserted
or something equally fun. As soon as we got there and the nurse had
weighed Fallon we knew something was terribly wrong. She weighed 7
pounds and 3-1/2 ounces, a full 2 pounds less than her birth weight.
I immediately started crying uncontrollably, even before the nurse
had left to get the doctor. Greg had tears in his eyes as well. I
just kept looking at him and saying “Oh my God” between the sobs. It
took forever for the doctor to get to us. When she did she looked her
over head to toe and asked us how she was eating. I said she was
crying when I tried to nurse her and the doctor said “Is it like she
pops off after she starts?” I said, “I guess you could say that…”
All this time she was examining her. She finally got to her ears and
said she had an ear infection! That was why she was screaming when I
tried to nurse her. I was shocked! How could my baby have gotten an
ear infection!?! I was glad to know it was something treatable but I
felt so incredibly guilty for not bringing her in or for not somehow
knowing something serious was going on. And then to top it all off,
when I said that Fallon hadn’t had a bowel movement since Thursday,
the doctor said, “Of course not. She’s starving!” I totally fell
apart at that point. I felt so terrible for starving my baby. I had
visions of her wasting away. That was the lowest moment in my life,
hearing those words.

After I collected myself, the doctor asked a bit
more about what was going on as far as nursing and she told me to
rent an electric pump right away and begin pumping every 2 hours
around the clock to get my milk supply back up, since Fallon
obviously had not been nursing effectively because of the pain it
would cause her ears. She also said to give the expressed breastmilk
to Fallon in a cup or medicine dropper since it would be too painful
to nurse, and we would want to avoid nipple confusion with a bottle.
She said that a few times a day I should try to nurse her, even maybe
giving her Tylenol before hand, just so she wouldn’t forget how to
nurse at the breast. She instructed me to bring Fallon in every day
to have her weighed. She prescribed Amoxicillan and we left. I’ll
never forget that ride home. We were both so upset. We had no idea
that things were this wrong. We never even noticed the weight loss,
but now when we looked at her it was obvious. So then we felt guilty
again and kept asking why we didn’t know, why we didn’t bring her in,
how could this happen, etc. We went directly home and within minutes
Greg was sent to get an electric pump.

My first tries at pumping were so discouraging. I
would pump 20 minutes or a half hour on each side and get only 1 or 2
ounces total, which I thought was hardly any. I was so worried that I
wouldn’t be able to express enough to feed Fallon. We gave her
everything I could manage to pump, which I did do around the clock
every 2 hours. Sometimes Greg would feed her while I was pumping and
I remember feeling so sad that she had to eat that way. Greg of
course felt very helpful and was very sweetly giving her the milk
little by little out of a dropper. She would look into his eyes and
he would tear up. There were many moments when I couldn’t relax
enough to get a let down for the pump, so I used the hot diapers
again and would look at Fallon imagining the day when she would be
able to nurse on my breasts exclusively. I did try to nurse her but
it was obviously painful to her and all I could think about were the
times when I had almost forced her to nurse all the while she was
screaming, remembering it, but now knowing I had been hurting her. I
just couldn’t do it any more than I had to so at the first sign of
rejection I let her go. The image of me trying to nurse her through
those screaming spells still haunts me, as I imagine the pain she
must have been in. I wished I had listened to her instead of trying
to continue despite her cries.

After a day of pumping, we decided it was best to
supplement the expressed breastmilk with a little formula. This was
the toughest decision we had ever made. It was so hard, as I had
wanted to avoid formula, but my supply had decreased so much and we
were so concerned about her gaining her weight back, that we felt it
would be best . I was still pumping every 2 hours during the day, and
every 4 at night, looking forward to the day that we could toss that
formula! By the 3rd day, we had switched to a bottle, since Fallon
was getting frustrated with the dropper. But after a couple days I
was able to nurse her about half time, and we both felt a lot better
about that! By the 6th day, I felt ready to go back to exclusive
nursing. It just happens that this was the day that my mother and I
were to fly into St. Louis to meet Greg, and essentially move across
the country. Fallon had gained a pound in that week, and her ears
were clear. I was so nervous about being able to nurse her
exclusively, but we were leaving the rented electric pump behind for
good and I had no choice. So Mom and I went to the airport and went
for it! We did bring a couple or small cans of formula “just in case”
but I am happy to report we never opened them. We got through about 8
hours of traveling with me nursing Fallon on demand and in public, at
only 2 weeks, and only 6 days after finding out about her ear
infection and 2 pound weight loss.. From that day on, until she was
about 6 months Fallon received only breastmilk.

Our nursing relationship continued and as time
went by I fell more and more in love with my baby. She was like an
angel. She did still have fussy periods that I could trace to some
food I had eaten…Even a piece of cheese on a burger would set her
off. She did have trouble with throwing up a large amount every day,
at least once. The pediatrician kept telling me it was just a case of
getting “too much, too fast” but unfortunately didn’t tell me what to
do about it! She made it sound like it was normal and she will grow
out of it, so I just put up with it. I didn’t even mention it to my
LLL Leaders, at least not as a problem I was having…It wasn’t until
about 2 or 3 months that I realized I had an oversupply problem. I
read an article in “The Doula” magazine about overabundant milk
supply and so many of the symptoms fit us! Gassiness, very short
nursings (she was nursing only 5 minutes at a time), milk spraying
across the room, vomiting…So I took their advice and started to
nurse on only one side at a time. It worked! It took a while for the
supply to settle down, but the gassiness ended, she stopped throwing
up, I sprayed and leaked very little, and she started nursing for
longer periods. She still never really nursed for more than 10
minutes, but that was all at one side. She compensated by continuing
to nurse every 2 hours and every 4 at night until she was about a
year! I have done a bit of research about oversupply and it can now
be classified as one of my “causes,” as I think it is a very common
but frequently overlooked problem. I have since found out that it can
cause nursing strikes, “self-weaning” at an early age, and nipple
soreness as well as the symptoms I had.

At about 4 months I needed to be away from Fallon
for 4 or 5 hours to take an exam to get a Missouri teaching
certificate. At that time I was still planning on returning to
teaching, mainly for financial reasons, at least part time, sometime
when Fallon was 1 or 2. This was to be the first time I would be away
from her for more than 2 hours and we had tried for months to get her
to take a bottle in preparation for this, but to no avail. Someone at
a League meeting suggested we try a sippy cup–the kind with the
flip-up straws. It worked! So that day Fallon had her first
mommy-milk without me. I was surprised that a baby that young could
drink from a straw, but she did a great job! It was SO hard to be
away from her. I ended up passing the test, but I don’t know how,
because I was so distracted thinking about Fallon at home!
Fallon’s weaning started at about 5-1/2 or 6
months when we gave her her first solid food. I hesitate to call it
weaning though, because she never decreased the amount she nursed! We
didn’t use solids to replace feedings, but fed her after she had
already nursed. I was very pleased with my pediatrician’s attitude
toward solids…She told us that for babies under a year, solids are
mainly just for their enjoyment and experimentation. So we never
pushed them on her, just offered when she seemed interested. Her
first food was rice cereal. We soon found out that constipated her so
we switched to baby oatmeal and barley. When she ate that first
spoonful, I cried! She was growing up! And she wasn’t dependent on me
100% anymore. It was a sad day, but I was excited for her. When she
got it, she had this look on her face like she had been waiting for
that all her life! She had been grabbing for our food and giving us
that begging look since she was about 4 months, but I put it off as
long as I could stand it. I struggled with that for a long time. I
remember writing a friend of mine asking for advice, because I felt
that beginning solids would be the beginning of the end of nursing,
that she would prefer them over me, or that my supply would
decrease…Wrong! On all counts. It barely affected our nursing at
all, and I am grateful for that. Up until a year, Fallon continued to
“nurse like a newborn,” and we would offer her solids whenever we
were eating. She didn’t really eat much, just a taste here and there.
I was concerned, but grateful that she was nursing so much because I
knew she was getting a balanced diet no matter what she took in from
other sources.

At right around a year, she began to ask to nurse
less and less. It seemed to drop off very suddenly, sometime around
just before she started to walk. Someone asked me how much she nursed
then, and I counted the times she had nursed that day and it was only
something like 5. Then there was the day around 13 months, when she
was fussing a little, so I offered to nurse…”Do you want some
mama?” Fallon toddled right over to the counter, raised her hands up
and grunted! I offered again, and she grunted even louder! So I got
the crackers she was eyeing and she was SO happy! I was crushed. That
was a sad day, one that I will never forget, because it became
crystal clear for me what self-weaning meant. But at the same time, I
was thrilled to see that Fallon is growing up and is doing it on her
time-table.

The rest, as they say is history. Fallon is
now a happy thriving 2 year old, never had another ear infection or
any other illnesses thanks to breastfeeding.

I thought I would share this with you. I just had my second child on
April 1, 2006. The due date was March 28th and I was just not
progressing and wondered if I would ever have this child. I had an
uneventful pregnancy and was healthy the entire time. Finally, at
5:17 a.m. on Saturday, April 1st I woke up with a stomach ache. I
started having contractions. My doctor was on vacation but promised
me he would come in for the delivery of our little boy. I got to the
hospital at 9:45 and was 4cm dilated and having contractions about
every 5-7 minutes. I checked into my room and got ready for what I
thought would be a quick birth. I got my epidural around noon and
was ready to go. My doctor did come in as promised and I was so glad
to see him. He told the nurses to give me some pitocin to get my contractions a little more consistent and
more intense and to call him when the baby starts crowning. At about
5:30 p.m. my son finally started to crown and the doctor came back
for the delivery. I pushed for what seemed like days but I just
couldn’t get my son to come out. The doctor was in the delivery
position and had his mask and gown on while two nurses held my feet
on either side of him. I had a big contraction and the doctor had
put one glove on…he turned to get his other glove on when the nurse
yelled, “DOCTOR” as the doctor was turning back to face me from
getting his glove out shot my son and the doctor and nurse caught him
on the way to the floor. We all got a big chuckle out of this and
were thankful that our doctor had a good set of hands and caught
him.

Shauna Schmidt
Appleton, WI