Tuesday April 08th 2008, 9:23 am
Filed under: Educational
I’ve never had the time to go to a homeschool convention, and now with the way gas prices are rising, driving anywhere comes under some scrutiny at my house. Do we really need to go there? Is it worth the price to drive there?
The Ultimate Homeschool Expo is starting soon, and it’s an excellent (actually, superior!) alternative to the typical homeschool convention. For a super low price you can attend a homeschool convention from the comforts of home. You get to listen to a HUGE amount of speakers (and you can even listen more than once)–way more than you would get to see at an in-person convention.
You also get a large amount of freebies and bonus goodies that are worth way, way more than the cost of a ticket to the event.
You can even hear ME as a speaker, which I know you are dying to do!
I would say that even for someone who is not homeschooling but is thinking about it, this would be a great opportunity to learn a lot without getting overwhelmed trying to fit everything into one weekend.
If there’s one thing that I’ve found most of us have in common, we all love a bargain! Well, this week I have an incredible offer for you that I know you’re going to love.
My friend Tawra Kellam runs Living on a Dime, one of the internet’s most popular web sites dedicated to helping all of us live well on less.
This week Tawra is allowing me to share a fabulous offer with you folks. To celebrate St. Patrick’s Day you can get **17** wonderful eBooks for just $17!! This collection of books includes
Grocery Savings book
Menus on a Dime
Quick Dinners
Plan Ahead Leftovers
Teaching your kids about managing money
Gifts in a Jar recipes and instructions
Money Management to help you get out of debt
Debt-Free Holidays
and a whole bunch more!
I have most of Tawra’s books and can tell you that they are chock-full of practical and helpful ideas that really WILL help you save money!
Saturday March 01st 2008, 1:42 pm
Filed under: Educational
This year, March is the month for Easter!Religiously it is celebrated as the resurrection of Jesus after his crucifixion, and secularly, it is celebrated with colored eggs, chocolate candies and stuffed bunnies.Easter is called a “moveable” Holiday because it is unfixed in relation to the civil calendar and follows the cycle of the moon.In the West, Easter always falls on a Sunday anytime from March 22nd – April 25,th and the rule since the Middle Ages has been that Easter is observed on the Sunday after the first full moon.Whether celebrating in the religious manner with the traditions of the church, or by decorating eggs and hiding them throughout the house, most families in the United States, as well as other countries around the world celebrate the Easter Holiday in some way or another.
·In Canada, eggs and other treats are distributed by the Easter Bunny.The modern belief that eggs are delivered by a rabbit known as the Easter Bunny comes from the legend of the Goddess Eostre. So much did a lowly rabbit want to please the Goddess that he laid the sacred eggs in her honor, gaily decorated them, and humbly presented them to her.She was so pleased at the gift that she wished all humankind to share in her joy. In honor of her wishes, the rabbit went through the entire world and distributed these little decorated gifts of life.
·In the UK, families exchange chocolate eggs on Easter Sunday. They also enjoy a traditional Sunday Roast Dinner and eat foods like Simnel cake, a fruit cake with eleven marzipan balls representing the eleven faithful apostles. Hot cross buns are also eaten through Holy Week and the Easter period. In Northern England and Ireland, families gather together and roll decorated eggs down steep hills.
·Norway has a more contemporary Easter tradition that involves the solving of murder mysteries that are broadcast on television and printed in the local newspapers and magazines.
·In Finland, Sweden and Denmark, small children dressed up as witches and collect candy and treats door-to-door, in exchange for decorated pussy willows. This mixture comes from the old Orthodox tradition in which houses are blessed with willow branches, and the Scandinavian Easter witch tradition.
·People in Germany and the Netherlands light Easter fires on Easter Sunday at sunset.
·In Hungary, perfume or perfumed water is sprinkled in exchange for an Easter egg.
No matter our religious denomination, ethnicity or culture, we can broaden our horizons and add some new experiences to our own family traditions.Whether we try some new foods for Easter dinner, roll our eggs down the steepest hill in our neighborhood, or read a mystery story aloud as a family, experiencing different and unique things together can lead to some treasured family memories.
Lisa Smith is the Owner/CEO of Regionz Kidz, a multi-cultural infant & toddler clothing line featuring ethnically diverse characters and designs.She publishes a blog on her website http://www.regionzkidz.com that discusses cultural diversity & children & is a frequent guest blogger on other blogs and websites regarding parenting and children’s issues. She is also a monthly contributor to Educated Mommy Magazine.You can contact Lisa directly at: lisa@regionzkidz.com
Saturday February 23rd 2008, 6:43 am
Filed under: Educational
At some point in the life of a parent, it becomes necessary to talk with your child about discrimination, prejudice or more simply, the things that make people different from one another.Whether its race, religion, culture or skin color, children are naturally curious and will ask questions.The important thing, if you are a parent, is to know what to say and how to answer their questions when the time comes.
The age of the child is one of the most important things to consider when talking to children about racial differences.Children from ages 2-3 begin to notice physical aspects of identity and gender. This is followed by curiosity about skin color, hair color and texture, eye shape and color. They may also begin to recognize cultural differences and they may show signs of “pre-prejudice” such as acting afraid, uncomfortable or avoiding or ignoring other children they perceive to be different.Three-and 4-year-olds begin to seek answers to their questions about differences. They show a greater awareness of appearances and they ask questions about where they got their own skin, hair, and eye color.Five-year-olds begin to build a group ethnic identity, as well as an individual identity within that group. They are more capable of exploring the differences and similarities between groups. They accept the use of categories and begin to look to see where they fit in.Six-to 8-year-olds begin to realize that their ethnicity is not changeable. They begin to become aware of attitudes for and against racial, religious, and cultural groups and they are highly influenced by significant adults, peers, and the media. Cultural pride may also begin to develop at this age.Nine- to 12-year-olds become more aware of the attitudes and behaviors within institutional settings and they also begin to get a clear understanding of the struggles against bias and are more willing to discuss culture, race, and differences.
Once we understand the capabilities of our children to understand our answers, we must then decide what to tell them!There is no perfect script and ultimately your discussion will probably not be perfect, but opening the door to communication is the first step to stopping hate, prejudice and inequality and to opening your child’s eyes to the diversity around them.Regardless of your child’s age, you can use the following pointers to help you discuss this difficult topic.
Do not pretend everyone is the same:Children are not blind to the fact that people look, dress and speak differently from them.They need simple, truthful and accurate information that addresses those differences and helps to reduce their fearfulness or hesitation.
Talking about prejudice does not increase its prevalence:Children do not learn prejudice from having open, honest discussions about physical differences.They learn prejudice from the media, peers and influential figures in their lives.If you are accurate with your information and you help your child to be consistent with their actions regarding discrimination then your child will be more likely to know what to do and how to behave when confronted with a situation that requires them to act appropriately.
Discuss what is different as well as what is the same:It is important that children understand that what makes us different, makes us who we are.Although it is important that we focus on inner qualities more often than outer, we should not ignore the differences; rather we should attempt to explain that often customs, manner of dress or culture can be expressed in many ways.
Treat all questions with respect:Despite being awkward, embarrassing and at times, even humorous, you should try not to silence your child or to make them feel that they asked a forbidden question.This may keep them from discussing it with you in the future.
Answer questions clearly and honestly: Try to understand what they are really asking and give short, simple answers that children can understand. Try not to over explain and if you don’t know an answer, say so.If you give a wrong answer, correct yourself. Give children simple, factual answers to questions rather than general “all-encompassing’ statements.
Despite being a challenging conversation, it is an accomplishment as a parent just to start a dialogue about such an important and controversial topic.The more we know about how to talk to our children about the differences in our world, the better we can equip them to become open-minded, unbiased adults.We as parents can give our children the tools to make their world a more loving, accepting place just by providing them a comfortable place to voice their questions and concerns, and an ear to listen to what they have to say.
Lisa Smith is the Owner/CEO of Regionz Kidz, a multi-cultural infant & toddler clothing line featuring ethnically diverse characters and designs.She publishes a blog on her website http://www.regionzkidz.com that discusses cultural diversity & children & is a frequent guest blogger on other blogs and websites regarding parenting and children’s issues. She is also a monthly contributor to Educated Mommy Magazine.You can contact Lisa directly at: lisa@regionzkidz.com
Friday February 08th 2008, 8:23 am
Filed under: Educational
In many communities across America the complaint is the same; “I want to help my children learn about other races, religions and cultures, but my community isn’t very integrated & my circle of friends is not diverse, what do I do?”It’s true that although we are a country of diverse backgrounds, most people tend to seek out groups of friends of the same race, religion and/or ethnicity.It is easier to find common ground and the language barrier is not present when spending time with others who share in our culture.However, parents would like their children to be accepting and tolerant of other cultures even though they may not be exposed to them on a regular basis, what’s a parent to do?
Enter the wonderful world of children’s television programming.With the choices our children now have, you can expose your children to multiple cultures, languages and traditions all in the same afternoon.A new study released recently from the American Academy of Pediatrics reveals that high-quality educational programming can have a positive effect on young children. These programs assist in the acquisition of general knowledge and improve cognitive learning among children ages six and younger. The report also states that educational programming which emphasizes cultural and racial diversity can improve children’s attitudes to those subjects.
So, the television now becomes the ultimate cultural teacher & not the “boob tube” that parents once thought it to be.The one possible drawback to this seemingly perfect answer?There must be culturally diverse and age-appropriate shows for children to view & learn from.
Luckily for us parents searching, children’s programmers have responded.There are any number of shows on television today featuring characters of different races, with disabilities and even those that speak different languages.Three child-oriented stations are leading the pack with their high-quality, diverse and educational television programs.
PBS is the trailblazer in this category features Sesame Street, which has taught generations of children around the world their ABCs and how to count.Much more than that, since the inception of the show 35 year ago, there have been racially diverse characters & characters with disabilities & they all work together to promote the overall the message of acceptance and togetherness.Even today, there are strong female characters, multi-lingual characters that teach “words of the day,” & they have featured adopted families, non-traditional families & characters in wheelchairs all enjoying their time on 123 Sesame Street.
Nickelodeon has been the big winner in viewer share and profit with their introduction of Dora the Explorer and it’s spin off, Go Diego Go.These educational cartoons feature multi-lingual, Hispanic characters that teach about animals, letters, numbers, counting and Hispanic traditions.The real innovation with these programs is that they also focus on teaching Spanish to non-native speakers.The repetition and interactive nature of the 30 minute shows make learning fun and also get children up off of the couch to participate in the actions that Dora, Diego and their friends instruct.
Nick is also launching a series in February with an Asian-American leading lady. The show, “Ni Hao, Kai Lan,” was created by a first generation Chinese American.It targets 2- to 5-year-olds and follows bilingual five-year-old Kai-Lan as she learns about her inter-generational Chinese-American family. The curriculum focuses on social and emotional lessons, multicultural values, cause-and-effect thinking, and basic Mandarin Chinese language skills.
Finally, we have NOGGIN TV and the show, Little Bill, the everyday adventures of an African-American boy.The show is based on Bill Cosby’s popular book series and is developed through research and in consultation with educational experts. The show is designed to help kids celebrate their everyday experiences and the people who share them. Little Bill shows kids that what they do makes a difference in the world. By dealing with conflicts encountered in everyday life, the program encourages children to value the love of their family, to increase self-esteem, and to develop social skills.
These programs are just the first in a long line of diverse and unique shows that will help our children to see that different is just different and we are no better or worse for not looking, speaking or dressing like “everyone else.”Congratulations to PBS, Nickelodeon and Noggin TV for being innovators and addressing the need that we as parents have for teaching from the comfort of our own homes.Nothing replaces the human interaction and relationships that are important to helping children understand cultural differences; it is still important to try to get involved and meet other families that are different from us.In some circumstances however, that proves extremely difficult and given the choice between not exposing them to these differences at all, or spending an hour watching any of the children’s programs that were created to teach and enrich their experiences, I’m picking up the remote control.
Lisa Smith is the Owner/CEO of Regionz Kidz, a multi-cultural infant & toddler clothing line featuring ethnically diverse characters and designs.She publishes a blog on her website www.regionzkidz.com that discusses cultural diversity & children & is a frequent guest blogger on other blogs and websites regarding parenting and children’s issues. She is also a monthly contributor to Educated Mommy Magazine.You can contact Lisa directly at: lisa@regionzkidz.com
In a world where there are so many cultures and ethnicities represented in our society we must learn how we can teach our children about the many types of people who make up our world.
Do you remember who taught you about how people were different from you? Or did you have to figure it out on your own as you encountered them as you grew up? Whichever the case, we hope that you will teach your child about the diversity in our world so that they can learn to be tolerant of others and live peacefully with them in society.
Here are some ways to make sure that your child understands the diversity among us and has tolerance for others:
Books, movies, and toys that encourage and promote diversity. The use of books, movies, toys and other items in your home that teach about other cultures and ethnicities can help your child to embrace the differences that are among us. Exposure to differences starting at a young age helps a child to develop accepting attitudes of other cultures.
Teach your child about other cultural traditions. While you are celebrating Christmas, another family might be choosing to celebrate Hanukkah. Why not invite that family to share in some of your activities and ask if you might share in some of theirs, allowing both sets of children to learn about the differences & similarities in the traditions.
Teach your child what is considered tolerable. Remember that sometimes a concept such as tolerance can be confusing for a child. They might mistake it for allowing others to bully them. This should not be the case. Make sure that they understand tolerance does not mean allowing malice or meanness to take place, but only allowing participation and sharing of their culture with others.
Talk openly and answer questions. Have a policy or agreement with your child that it is okay to ask questions. Allow them to ask you about things that they are unsure about, reminding them to do this in private rather than in the grocery store in front of the lady who is dressed differently because of her culture. Remind them to respect others while they are in their presence and afterwards, but encourage them to talk openly about any questions that they might have in private between the two of you. Later you might research more about the culture of the person that they were wondering about.
These are just a few ways that you can help your child to begin to understand and tolerate the various people that we encounter everyday and our many differences.
Lisa Smith has a BA in psychology, & is the Owner of Regionz Kidz (www.regionzkidz.com,) a multi-cultural infant and toddler clothing line with ethnically diverse characters and designs. She publishes a blog on the Regionz Kidz website that features articles about cultural diversity and children & she is a guest blogger on several other websites and blogs relating to parenting and children’s issues. You can contact Lisa directly at: lisa@regionzkidz.com
How many times do you grab a good book, pull your child or children into your lap or snuggle on the couch and read to them? So many of us are guilty of never finding the time, when reading is such an important skill for children to learn. We as parents have the greatest influence over whether or not they begin to learn or choose to learn to read. We can encourage them to learn to read by making books and reading an important part of their life from day one.
“Reading aloud with children is known to be the single most important activity for building the knowledge and skills they will eventually require for learning to read.”
—Marilyn Jager Adams
Reading offers so many valuable things to children. Here are just a few:
Reading is entertaining. Do you think they always had cable television wired to most every house in America, well of course not? Great literature was a popular concept many years ago, much more so than it is today and reading was a favorite past time of almost everyone. Why not make that the case for your child by starting them out reading at an early age and continuing to encourage them to read over the span of their childhood.
2.Reading encourages learning. Reading to your child encourages them to want to learn and gives them the opportunity to have their curiosity stirred by new ideas and concepts, such as how people live differently in different places, how things are made, or where things came from. We can use reading to teach about cultures, traditions and the similarities we all share. So many questions can be formed in the mind of a child as you read to them, thus encouraging them to dig in and find out more!
3.Reading increases your child’s vocabulary. If you want to ensure that your child begins to talk at the right age, learns to say your name, the names of their family members and even things out in the world, you can help them to do so by reading to them. Reading to a child begins teaching them and exposing them to a wide vocabulary, even as a baby. Many doctors encourage women to even read to their babies while they are still in their womb.
4.Reading gives your child knowledge. Knowledge about the world, people, themselves, everything you can think of. Thousands of ideas, topics, themes and concepts can be found in written form in books, on billboards, or even on the side of your morning cereal box. Knowledge is all around us and we consume it by reading it. Encouraging your child to read allows them to soak up all this knowledge.
Lisa Smith has a BA in psychology, & is the Owner of Regionz Kidz (www.regionzkidz.com,) a multi-cultural infant and toddler clothing line with ethnically diverse characters and designs. She publishes a blog on the Regionz Kidz website that features articles about cultural diversity and children & she is a guest blogger on several other websites and blogs relating to parenting and children’s issues. You can contact Lisa directly at: lisa@regionzkidz.com
Sunday January 20th 2008, 6:31 am
Filed under: Educational
Do your kids understand and embrace the ethnic diversity of those around them? Or, have they not been exposed to other races, cultures and ethnicities enough to even know that there are differences? Today’s culture lends itself to be a little more open about such differences, and this is a positive turn in our society.
Flip on the television and even on the preschool channel, there are a variety of culturally diverse shows including Dora the Explorer, Sesame Street, Go Diego Go, Little Bill and even Pinky Dinky Do, whose main character has pink hair.
Allowing your child to watch this variety of shows will show them at an early age that there are many different types of people in our world today. Pointing out the differences but realizing that these differences do not make one group of people better than or worse than another group of people will help your child to understand and embrace all cultures.
There are movies out there that can show your children a wide variety of cultural areas and allow them exposure to the different cultures that make up the world. You can also purchase dolls and clothing that are culturally diverse teaching your children even more about the many cultures that come together in our society.
The United States is becoming more and more of a “melting pot” as so many of us were taught in history class years ago - today it is becoming a reality. We want our children to embrace this concept of cultural diversity and be tolerant of people who are different from them.
Pop culture joining the ranks can only help us to teach more effectively. Allow your children to play with culturally diverse toys so that they can learn to be tolerant and loving to other cultures. Teach them about their own culture, helping them to understand why culture is important to everyone.
Be tolerant and embrace the cultures who are different from you and your family. Children will almost always copy what parents do, so, how you act towards other ethnicities gives them the framework for their own ideas and beliefs. Begin with yourself, and then teach your children, soon the world will be made up of one big happy diverse family if we can all work together to encourage tolerance and diversity.
Lisa Smith has a BA in psychology, & is the Owner of Regionz Kidz (www.regionzkidz.com,) a multi-cultural infant and toddler clothing line with ethnically diverse characters and designs. She publishes a blog on the Regionz Kidz website that features articles about cultural diversity and children & she is a guest blogger on several other websites and blogs relating to parenting and children’s issues. You can contact Lisa directly at: lisa@regionzkidz.com
Do you go to parks, zoos, amusement parks, festivals, busy, crowded places on vacation? What would you do if your child got lost? What would your child do if she got lost?
Usually luggage and pets have better identification than children – why? Is it because we think kids can talk for themselves? Or maybe you think “my child will not get lost, I am a great parent and I am always watching them.” If your child is lost, do you think she will know the right information and be able to communicate it to others? There is no substitute for parent supervision, but are you going to let your pride keep you from preparing for this very real issue? A better idea is for your child to have the phone numbers and information written down in an identification bracelet, tag or card and be taught what to do if they become lost.
Children are infinitely more precious than luggage or pets and therefore need to have some sort of ID at all times, especially when on an outing or vacation. The best way for a lost child to be returned quickly is for them to have all the information needed to reach you, written down.
There are many different styles of child identification. You have to pick what will work best for your child and the situation. There are stickers to go inside shoes, shoe tags that go on the shoelaces, ID bracelets, ID tags that can be attached to the child’s cloths, ID cards that can be carried in a pocket and our newest product – a temporary tattoo.
The ID should contain all the information needed for the child to get in touch with you. At a minimum it should include: mom and dad’s cell numbers, grandparent’s number(s), and your hotel phone number. Give it some thought and see what you think your child would need if they were to become lost. Then, put that information in writing and put it on your child in some form.
Another help is for you to carry a wallet ID for each child. These IDs contain a photo, height, weight, birthmarks, thumb print. If your child becomes lost your can immediately give this card to others to speed the correct information being given to everyone helping you look for your child. Anyone caring for your child should have this wallet ID.
Caution: don’t put your child’s name on the outside of bracelets, bags or clothing. This would give a stranger the opportunity to speak to them by name, making some children feel like the person is not a stranger since they knew their name. All the information can be written inside the bracelet or tag so that it can be looked at only if needed.
Small children need to be taught what being lost means. One way to describe it is if they can’t see mommy or daddy. Then, they need to be told what to do if they are lost. One suggestion is to teach them to look for another mommy with kids to ask for help.
I wanted to let you know that I was recently interviewed on a podcast show, talking about the subject of healthier eating. If you are needing some encouragement or inspiration in that area, click here to go listen to the show!
I had never heard of IBC until today when my mom sent me this link. Later today, we found out that my grandmother very likely has it. Tests will be in next week.
I just wanted to let you ladies know that The Old Schoolhouse magazine, one of the most popular homeschooling publications, is offering 25 Free Bonus Gifts when you subscribe to their magazine! Check it out here.
When we’re pregnant or awaiting adoption, we dream about our baby-to-be, we always envision those beautiful Hallmark card scenes: charming baby smiling up at peaceful mother’s face. We read books in advance of the big day about how care for a newborn ¾ how to bathe, feed and dress her ¾ and then we feel somewhat prepared. However, a crying baby was never part of that idyllic vision, so this takes us by surprise. But the fact is, all babies cry atone time or another. Some babies cry more than others, but they all do cry. Understanding why babies cry can help you get through this phase and respond effectively to your crying baby ¾ so can the list of ideas that follows.
Why does my baby cry?
Simply put, babies cry because they cannot talk. Babies are human beings, and they have needs and desires, just as we do, but they can’t express them. Even if they could talk, very often they wouldn’t understand why they feel the way they do, they wouldn’t understand themselves well enough to articulate their needs, so babies need someone to help them figure it all out. Their cries are the only way they can say, “Help me! Something isn’t right here!”
Different kinds of cries
As you get to know your baby, you’ll become the expert in understanding his cries in a way that no one else can. In their research, child development professionals have determined that certain types of cries mean certain things. In other words, babies don’t cry the same exact way every time. (Other child development experts, also known as mothers, have known that for millennia.)
Over time, you’ll recognize particular cries as if they were spoken words. In addition to these cry signals, you often can determine why your baby is crying by the situation surrounding the cry. Following are common reasons for Baby’s cry, and the clues that may tell you what’s up:
Hunger: If three or four hours have passed since his last feeding, if he has just woken up, or if he has just had a very full diaper and he begins to cry, he’s probably hungry. A feeding will most likely stop the crying.
Tiredness: Look for these signs: decreased activity, losing interest in people and toys, rubbing eyes, looking glazed, and the most obvious ¾ yawning If you notice any of these in your crying baby, she may just need to sleep. Time for bed!
Discomfort: If a baby is uncomfortable ¾ too wet, hot, cold, squished ¾ he’ll typically squirm or arch his back when he cries, as if trying to get away from the source of his discomfort. Try to figure out the source of his distress and solve his problem.
Pain: A cry of pain is sudden and shrill, just like when an adult or older child cries out when they get hurt. It may include long cries followed by a pause during which your baby appears to stop breathing. He then catches his breath and lets out another long cry.Time to check your baby’s temperature and undress him for a full-body examination.
Overstimulation: If the room is noisy, people are trying to get your baby’s attention, rattles are rattling, music boxes are playing, and your baby suddenly closes her eyes and cries (or turns her head away), she may be trying to shut out all that’s going on around her and find some peace. It’s time for a quiet, dark room and some peaceful cuddles.
Illness: When your baby is sick, he may cry in a weak, moaning way. This is his way of saying, “I feel awful.” If your baby seems ill, look for any signs of sickness, take her temperature and call your healthcare provider.
Frustration. Your baby is just learning how to control her hands, arms, and feet. She may be trying to get her fingers into her mouth or to reach a particularly interesting toy, but her body isn’t cooperating. She cries out of frustration, because she can’t accomplish what she wants to do. All she needs is a little help.
Loneliness: If your baby falls asleep feeding and you place her in her crib, but she wakes soon afterward with a cry, she may be saying that she misses the warmth of your embrace and doesn’t like to be alone. A simple situation to resolve…
Worry or fear. Your baby suddenly finds himself in the arms of Great Aunt Matilda and can’t see you; his previously happy gurgles turn suddenly to crying. He’s trying to tell you that he’s scared: He doesn’t know this new person, and he wants Mommy or Daddy. Explain to Auntie that he needs a little time to warm up to someone new, and try letting the two of them get to know each other while Baby stays in your arms.
Boredom. Your baby has been sitting in his infant seat for 20 minutes while you talk and eat lunch with a friend. He’s not tired, hungry or uncomfortable, but he starts a whiny, fussy cry. He may be saying that he’s bored and needs something new to look at or touch. A new position for his seat or a toy to hold may help.
Colic. If your baby cries inconsolably for long periods every day, particularly at the same time each day, he may have colic. Researchers are still unsure of colic’s exact cause. Some experts believe that colic is related to the immaturity of a baby’s digestive system. Whatever the cause, and it may be a combination of all the theories; colic is among the most exasperating conditions that parents of new babies face. Colic occurs only to newborn babies, up to about four to five months of age. Look for patterns to your baby’s crying; these can provide clues as to which suggestions are most likely to help. Then experiment with some of the ideas in this list and in the rest of this article.
·If breastfeeding, feed on demand (cue feeding), for nutrition as well as comfort, as often as your baby needs a calming influence.
·If breastfeeding, try avoiding foods that may cause gas in your baby, such as dairy products, caffeine, cabbage, broccoli and other gassy vegetables.
·If bottlefeeding, offer more frequent but smaller meals; experiment with different formulas with your doctor or health care provider’s approval.
·If bottlefeeding, try different types of bottles and nipples that prevent air from entering your baby as he drinks, such as those with curved bottles or collapsible liners.
·Hold your baby in a more upright position for feeding and directly afterwards.
·Experiment with how often and when you burp your baby.
·Offer meals in a quiet setting.
·If baby likes a pacifier, offer him one.
·Invest in a baby sling or carrier and use it during colicky periods.
·If the weather’s too unpleasant for an outside stroll, bring your stroller in the house and walk your baby around.
·Give your baby a warm bath.
·Hold your baby with her legs curled up toward her belly.
·Massage your baby’s tummy, or give him a full massage.
·Swaddle your baby in a warm blanket.
·Lay your baby tummy down across your lap and massage or pat her back.
·Hold your baby in a rocking chair, or put him in a swing.
·Walk with Baby in a quiet, dark room while you hum or sing.
·Try keeping your baby away from highly stimulating situations during the day when possible to prevent sensory overload.
·Lie on your back and lay your baby on top of your tummy down while massaging his back. (Transfer your baby to his bed if he falls asleep.)
·Take Baby for a ride in the car.
·Play soothing music or turn on white noise such as a vacuum cleaner or running water.
·As a last resort, ask your doctor or health care provider about medications available for colic and gas.
What about fussy crying?
There are plenty of times when you can’t tell if your baby’s crying is directly related to a fixable situation: hunger, a soiled diaper, or a longing to be held. That’s when parents get frustrated and nervous. That’s when you should take a deep breath and try some of the following cry-stoppers:
Hold your baby. No matter the reason for your baby’s cry, being held by a warm and comforting person offers a feeling of security and may calm his crying. Babies love to be held in arms, slings, front-pack carriers, and (when they get a little older) backpacks; physical contact is what they seek and what usually soothes them best.
Breastfeed your baby. Nursing your baby is as much for comfort as food. All four of my babies calmed easily when brought to the breast ¾ so much so that my husband has always called it “The Secret Weapon.” And my babies are very typical. Breastfeeding is an important and powerful tool for baby soothing.
Provide motion. Babies enjoy repetitive, rhythmic motion such as rocking, swinging, swaying, jiggling, dancing or a drive in the car. Many parents instinctually begin to sway with a fussy baby, and for a good reason: It works.
Turn on some white noise. The womb was a very noisy place. Remember the sounds you heard on the Doppler stethoscope? Not so long ago, your baby heard those 24 hours a day. Therefore, your baby sometimes can be calmed by “white noise” ¾ that is, noise that is continuous and uniform, such as that of a heartbeat, the rain, static between radio stations, and your vacuum cleaner. Some alarm clocks even have a white noise function.
Let music soothe your baby. Soft, peaceful music is a wonderful baby calmer. That’s why lullabies have been passed down through the ages. You don’t have to be a professional singer to provide your baby with a song; your baby loves to hear your voice. In addition to your own songs, babies usually love to hear any kind of music. Experiment with different types of tunes, since babies have their own favorites that can range from jazz to country to classical, and even rock and rap.
Swaddle your baby. During the first three or four months of life, many babies feel comforted if you can re-create the tightly contained sensation they enjoyed in the womb..
Massage your baby. Babies love to be touched and stroked, so a massage is a wonderful way to calm a fussy baby. A variation of massage is the baby pat; many babies love a gentle, rhythmic pat on their backs or bottoms.
Let your baby have something to suck on. The most natural pacifier is mother’s breast, but when that isn’t an option, a bottle, pacifier, Baby’s own fingers, a teething toy, or Daddy’s pinkie can work wonders as a means of comfort.
Distract your baby. Sometimes a new activity or change of scenery ¾ maybe a walk outside, or a dance with a song, or a splashy bath ¾ can be very helpful in turning a fussy baby into a happy one.
Reading your baby’s body language
Many times, you can avoid the crying altogether by responding right away to your baby’s earliest signals of need, such asfussing, stiffening her body, or rooting for the breast. As you get to know your baby and learn her signals, determining what she needs will become easier for you ¾ even before she cries.
This article is a copyrighted excerpt from Gentle Baby Care by Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)
I remember when I was lying in my hospital bed after the birth of my fourth child, Coleton. I had endured a full day of labor and a difficult delivery (who says the fourth one comes easily?), and I was tired beyond explanation. After the relief of seeing my precious new child came an uncontrollable feeling to close my eyes and sleep. As my husband cradled newborn Coleton, I drifted off; my parting thoughts were, “I can’t do this. I don’t have the energy. How will I ever take care of a baby?” Luckily for me, a few hours of sleep, a supportive family, and lucky genes were all it took to feel normal again. But as many as 80% of new mothers experience a case of the baby blues that lasts for weeks after the birth of their baby. This isn’t something new mothers can control ¾ there’s no place for blame. The most wonderful and committed mothers, even experienced mothers of more than one child, can get the baby blues.
What are baby blues?
Your baby’s birth has set into motion great changes in your body and in your life, and your emotions are reacting in a normal way. Dramatic hormonal shifts occur when a body goes from pregnant to not pregnant in a manner of minutes. Add to this your new title (Mommy!) and the responsibilities that go with it, and your blues are perfectly understandable. You’re not alone; this emotional letdown during the first few weeks is common after birth. Just remember that your state of mind has a physical origin and is exacerbated by challenging circumstances ¾ and you and your body will adjust to both soon.
How do I know if I have the baby blues?
Every woman who experiences the baby blues (also called postpartum blues) does so in a different way. The most common symptoms include:
Anxiety and nervousness
Sadness or feelings of loss
Stress and tension
Impatience or a short temper
Bouts of crying or tearfulness
Mood swings
Difficulty concentrating
Trouble sleeping or excessive tiredness
Not wanting to get dressed, go out, or clean up the house
Could it be more than just the baby blues?
If you’re not sure whether you have the blues ask your doctor or midwife, and don’t feel embarrassed: This is a question that health care providers hear often and with good reason. If you’re feeling these symptoms to a degree that disrupts your normal level of function, if your baby is more than a few weeks old, or if you have additional symptoms ¾ particularly feelings of resentment or rejection toward your baby or even a temptation to harm him ¾ you may have more than the blues, you may have postpartum depression. This is a serious illness that requires immediate treatment. Please call a doctor or professional today. If you can’t make the call, then please talk to your partner, your mother or father, a sibling or friend and ask them to arrange for help. Do this for yourself and for your baby. If you can’t talk about it, hand this page it to someone close to you. It’s that important. You do not have to feel this way, and safe treatment is available, even if you’re breastfeeding.
How can I get rid of the blues?
While typical baby blues are fairly brief and usually disappear on their own, you can do a few things to help yourself feel better and get through the next few emotional days or weeks:
· Give yourself time. Grant yourself permission to take the time you need to become a mother. Pregnancy lasts nine months, the adoption process can take even longer, and your baby’s actual birth is only a moment ¾ but becoming a mother takes time. Motherhood is an immense responsibility. In my opinion, it is the most overwhelming, meaningful, incredible, transforming experience of a lifetime. No wonder it produces such emotional and physical change!
No other event of this magnitude would ever be taken lightly, so don’t feel guilty for treating this time in your life as the very big deal it is. Remind yourself that it’s okay (and necessary) to focus on this new aspect of your life and make it your number-one priority. Tending to a newborn properly takes time ¾ all the time in his world. So, instead of feeling guilty or conflicted about your new focus, put your heart into getting to know this new little person. The world can wait for a few weeks.
Consider as objectively as you can just what you have accomplished: You have formed a new, entire person inside your own body and brought him forth; you have been party to a miracle. Or, if you’ve adopted, you’ve chosen to invite a miracle into your life and became an instant mother. You deserve a break and some space in which to just exist with your amazing little one, unfettered by outside concerns.
· Talk to someone who understands. Talk to a sibling, relative or friend with young children about what you are feeling. Someone who has experienced the baby blues can help you realize that they are temporary, and everything will be fine. A confidante can also serve as a checkpoint who can encourage you to seek help if he or she perceives that you need it.
·Reach out and get out. Simply getting out (if you are physically able and okayed for this by your health care provider) and connecting with people at large can go a long way toward reorienting your perspective. Four walls can close in very quickly, so change the scenery and head to the mall, the park, the library, a coffeehouse ¾ whatever place you enjoy. You’ll feel a sense of pride as strangers ooh and ahh over your little one, and your baby will enjoy the stimulation, too.
· Join a support group. Joining a support group, either in person or online, can help you sort through your feelings about new motherhood. Take care to choose a group that aligns with your core beliefs about parenting a baby. As an example, if you are committed to breastfeeding, but most other members of the group are bottlefeeding, this may not be the best place for you, since your breastfeeding issues won’t be understood and you won’t find many helpful ideas among this group. If you have multiples, a premature baby, or a baby with special needs, for example, seek out a group for parents with babies like yours. And within those parameters, look for a group with your same overall parenting beliefs. Just because you all have twin babies doesn’t mean you will all choose to parent them in the same way, so try to find like-minded new friends.
· Tell Daddy what he can do to help. It’s very important that your spouse or partner be there for you right now. He may want to help you, but he may be unsure of how. Here are a few things that he can do for you ¾ show him this list to help him help you:
Understand. It’s critical that your spouse or partner feel that you understand that she is going through a hormonally driven depression that she cannot control ¾ and that she is not “just being grumpy.” Tell her you know this is normal, and that she’ll be feeling better soon. Simply looking over this list and using some of the ideas will tell her a lot about your commitment to (and belief in) her.
Let her talk about her feelings. Knowing she can talk to you about her feelings without being judged or criticized will help her feel much better.
Tend to the baby. Taking care of your baby so Mommy can sleep or take a shower can give her a breath of fresh air. Have her nurse the baby and then you can take him for a walk (using a sling will keep Baby happy) or go on an outing. A benefit for you is that most babies love to be out and about and will enjoy this special time with you.
Step in to protect her. If she’s overwhelmed with visitors, kindly explain to company that she needs a lot of rest. Help her with whatever household duties usually fall to her (or get someone to help her) and do what you can to stay on top of yours. Worry about the house’s cleanliness or laundry upkeep will do her no good whatsoever. If relatives offer to take the baby for a few hours, or to help with the house, take them up on it.
Tell her she’s beautiful. Most woman feel depressed about the way they look after childbirth ¾ because most still look four months pregnant! After changing so greatly to accommodate a baby’s development, a woman’s body takes months to regain any semblance of normalcy. Be patient with both her body and her feelings about it. Tell her what an amazing thing she’s accomplished. Any compliments that acknowledge her unique beauty are sure to be greatly appreciated!
Tell her you love the baby. Don’t be bashful about gushing over the baby. Mommy loves to hear that you’re enraptured with this new little member of your family.
Be affectionate, but be patient about sex. With all that she’s struggling with physically and emotionally, weeks may pass before she’s ready for sex (even if she’s had an OK after her checkup.) That doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you or need you ¾ she just needs a little time to get back to the physical aspects of your sexual relationship.
Tell her you love her. Even when she isn’t feeling down, she needs to hear this ¾ and right now it’s more important for her health and well-being than ever.
Get support for you, too. Becoming a father is a giant step in your life. Open up to a friend about how it feels to be a Dad, and do things that you enjoy, too. Taking care of yourself will help you take care of your new family.
Accept help from others. Family and friends are often happy to help if you just ask. When people say, “Let me know if I can do anything” they usually mean it. So, go ahead and ask kindly for what you want, whether it’s watching your baby so that you can nap, taking your older child to the park, helping you make a meal, or doing some laundry.
Get some sleep. Right now, sleeplessness will enhance your feelings of depression. So, take every opportunity to get some shuteye. Nap when the baby sleeps, go to bed early, and sleep in later in the morning if you can. If you are co-sleeping, take advantage of this special time when you don’t have to get up out of bed to tend to your baby. And if your baby’s sleep patterns are distressing to you then reach out to an experienced parent for help, or check out my book The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night.
Don’t fret about perfection right now. Household duties are not your top priority now ¾ in fact, nothing aside from getting to know your baby is. Remember that people are coming to see your baby, not your house, so enjoy sharing your baby with visitors without worrying about a little clutter or dust. Simplify, prioritize, and delegate routine tasks, errands, and obligations.
Enjoy your job. If you work outside the home, then view your time at your job as an opportunity to refresh and prepare yourself to enjoy your baby fully when you are at home. Go ahead ¾ talk about your baby and share pictures with your co-workers. Chances are, they’ll love to hear about your new little one. This is a nice and appropriate way of indulging your natural instincts to focus on your baby when you can’t be with her.
Get into exercising. With your health care provider’s approval, start exercising with short walks or swims. Exercise will help you feel better in many ways both physical and emotional. Ev