A lot of moms are needing a fresh burst of inspiration these days, and I’ve got just the thing! Check out this page with great ideas for:
summer activities for kids
family-friendly summer recipes
summer exercise ideas for moms
and more!
It’s all here, and it’s all free. Enjoy!
Hey gals!
I wanted to let you know that I was recently interviewed on a podcast show, talking about the subject of healthier eating. If you are needing some encouragement or inspiration in that area, click here to go listen to the show!
If you’re thinking about eating healthier in 2008, you should check out my upcoming interactive online class. This class will help you succeed through
-encouraging you to establish realistic health habits rather than going to extremes
-go slow enough to let you have a chance to get the hang of one thing before adding something else
- lasting 12 weeks–so that you don’t burn out on your goals before they even have a chance to bloom
Check out the class here, and sign up today!
   By Elizabeth Pantley, author of Gentle Baby Care
I remember when I was lying in my hospital bed after the birth of my fourth child, Coleton. I had endured a full day of labor and a difficult delivery (who says the fourth one comes easily?), and I was tired beyond explanation. After the relief of seeing my precious new child came an uncontrollable feeling to close my eyes and sleep. As my husband cradled newborn Coleton, I drifted off; my parting thoughts were, “I can’t do this. I don’t have the energy. How will I ever take care of a baby?†Luckily for me, a few hours of sleep, a supportive family, and lucky genes were all it took to feel normal again. But as many as 80% of new mothers experience a case of the baby blues that lasts for weeks after the birth of their baby. This isn’t something new mothers can control ¾ there’s no place for blame. The most wonderful and committed mothers, even experienced mothers of more than one child, can get the baby blues.
What are baby blues?
Your baby’s birth has set into motion great changes in your body and in your life, and your emotions are reacting in a normal way. Dramatic hormonal shifts occur when a body goes from pregnant to not pregnant in a manner of minutes. Add to this your new title (Mommy!) and the responsibilities that go with it, and your blues are perfectly understandable. You’re not alone; this emotional letdown during the first few weeks is common after birth. Just remember that your state of mind has a physical origin and is exacerbated by challenging circumstances ¾ and you and your body will adjust to both soon.
How do I know if I have the baby blues?
Every woman who experiences the baby blues (also called postpartum blues) does so in a different way. The most common symptoms include:
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Could it be more than just the baby blues?
If you’re not sure whether you have the blues ask your doctor or midwife, and don’t feel embarrassed: This is a question that health care providers hear often and with good reason. If you’re feeling these symptoms to a degree that disrupts your normal level of function, if your baby is more than a few weeks old, or if you have additional symptoms ¾ particularly feelings of resentment or rejection toward your baby or even a temptation to harm him ¾ you may have more than the blues, you may have postpartum depression. This is a serious illness that requires immediate treatment. Please call a doctor or professional today. If you can’t make the call, then please talk to your partner, your mother or father, a sibling or friend and ask them to arrange for help. Do this for yourself and for your baby. If you can’t talk about it, hand this page it to someone close to you. It’s that important. You do not have to feel this way, and safe treatment is available, even if you’re breastfeeding.
How can I get rid of the blues?
While typical baby blues are fairly brief and usually disappear on their own, you can do a few things to help yourself feel better and get through the next few emotional days or weeks:
· Give yourself time. Grant yourself permission to take the time you need to become a mother. Pregnancy lasts nine months, the adoption process can take even longer, and your baby’s actual birth is only a moment ¾ but becoming a mother takes time. Motherhood is an immense responsibility. In my opinion, it is the most overwhelming, meaningful, incredible, transforming experience of a lifetime. No wonder it produces such emotional and physical change!
No other event of this magnitude would ever be taken lightly, so don’t feel guilty for treating this time in your life as the very big deal it is. Remind yourself that it’s okay (and necessary) to focus on this new aspect of your life and make it your number-one priority. Tending to a newborn properly takes time ¾ all the time in his world. So, instead of feeling guilty or conflicted about your new focus, put your heart into getting to know this new little person. The world can wait for a few weeks.
Consider as objectively as you can just what you have accomplished: You have formed a new, entire person inside your own body and brought him forth; you have been party to a miracle. Or, if you’ve adopted, you’ve chosen to invite a miracle into your life and became an instant mother. You deserve a break and some space in which to just exist with your amazing little one, unfettered by outside concerns.
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· Talk to someone who understands. Talk to a sibling, relative or friend with young children about what you are feeling. Someone who has experienced the baby blues can help you realize that they are temporary, and everything will be fine. A confidante can also serve as a checkpoint who can encourage you to seek help if he or she perceives that you need it.
· Reach out and get out. Simply getting out (if you are physically able and okayed for this by your health care provider) and connecting with people at large can go a long way toward reorienting your perspective. Four walls can close in very quickly, so change the scenery and head to the mall, the park, the library, a coffeehouse ¾ whatever place you enjoy. You’ll feel a sense of pride as strangers ooh and ahh over your little one, and your baby will enjoy the stimulation, too.
· Join a support group. Joining a support group, either in person or online, can help you sort through your feelings about new motherhood. Take care to choose a group that aligns with your core beliefs about parenting a baby. As an example, if you are committed to breastfeeding, but most other members of the group are bottlefeeding, this may not be the best place for you, since your breastfeeding issues won’t be understood and you won’t find many helpful ideas among this group. If you have multiples, a premature baby, or a baby with special needs, for example, seek out a group for parents with babies like yours. And within those parameters, look for a group with your same overall parenting beliefs. Just because you all have twin babies doesn’t mean you will all choose to parent them in the same way, so try to find like-minded new friends.
· Tell Daddy what he can do to help. It’s very important that your spouse or partner be there for you right now. He may want to help you, but he may be unsure of how. Here are a few things that he can do for you ¾ show him this list to help him help you:
Accept help from others.  Family and friends are often happy to help if you just ask. When people say, “Let me know if I can do anything†they usually mean it. So, go ahead and ask kindly for what you want, whether it’s watching your baby so that you can nap, taking your older child to the park, helping you make a meal, or doing some laundry.
Get some sleep. Right now, sleeplessness will enhance your feelings of depression. So, take every opportunity to get some shuteye. Nap when the baby sleeps, go to bed early, and sleep in later in the morning if you can. If you are co-sleeping, take advantage of this special time when you don’t have to get up out of bed to tend to your baby. And if your baby’s sleep patterns are distressing to you then reach out to an experienced parent for help, or check out my book The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night.
Don’t fret about perfection right now. Household duties are not your top priority now ¾ in fact, nothing aside from getting to know your baby is. Remember that people are coming to see your baby, not your house, so enjoy sharing your baby with visitors without worrying about a little clutter or dust. Simplify, prioritize, and delegate routine tasks, errands, and obligations.
Enjoy your job. If you work outside the home, then view your time at your job as an opportunity to refresh and prepare yourself to enjoy your baby fully when you are at home. Go ahead ¾ talk about your baby and share pictures with your co-workers. Chances are, they’ll love to hear about your new little one. This is a nice and appropriate way of indulging your natural instincts to focus on your baby when you can’t be with her.
Get into exercising. With your health care provider’s approval, start exercising with short walks or swims. Exercise will help you feel better in many ways both physical and emotional. Even if you didn’t exercise before you had your baby, this is a great time to start. Studies prove that regular exercise helps combat depression, and it will help you regain your pre-baby body much more quickly.
Eat healthful foods. When the body isn’t properly nourished, spirits can flag ¾ particularly when the stress of recovery makes more nutritional demands. If you are breastfeeding, a nourishing diet is important for both you and your baby. Healthful foods, eaten in frequent meals, can provide the nutrition you need to combat the baby blues and give you the energy you need to handle your new role. And don’t forget to drink water and other healthy fluids, especially if you’re nursing! Dehydration can cause fatigue and headaches.
Take care of yourself. Parenting a new baby is an enormous responsibility, but things will fall into place for you and everything will seem easier given time. During this adjustment phase, try to do a few things for yourself. Simple joys like reading a book, painting your nails, going out to lunch with a friend or other ways in which you nourish your spirit can help you feel happier.
Love yourself. You are amazing: You’ve become mother to a beautiful new baby. You’ve played a starring role in the production of an incredible miracle. Be proud of what you’ve accomplished, and take the time to know and enjoy the strong, capable, multifaceted person you are becoming.
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This article is a copyrighted excerpt from Gentle Baby Care by Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)
By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Kid Cooperation, Perfect Parenting and Hidden Messages
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Is your marriage everything you ever hoped it could be? Or has it been pushed down your list of priorities since having children? Let’s face it, parenthood is a full-time job, and it dramatically changes your marriage relationship. But marriage is the foundation upon which your entire family is structured. If your marriage is strong, your whole family will be strong; your life will be more peaceful, you’ll be a better parent, and you’ll, quite simply, have more fun in your life.
Make a commitment
To create or maintain a strong marriage you will have to take the first critical step: You must be willing to put time, effort and thought into nurturing your marriage. The ideas that follow will help you follow through on this commitment and will put new life and meaning into your marriage. A wonderful thing may happen. You may fall in love with your spouse all over again. In addition, your children will greatly benefit from your stronger relationship. Children feel secure when they know that Mom and Dad love each other—particularly in today’s world, where 50 percent of marriages end in divorce; half of your children’s friends have gone, or are going through a divorce; or maybe it’s your kids who have survived a divorce and are now living in a new family arrangement. Your children need daily proof that their family life is stable and predictable. When you make a commitment to your marriage, your children will feel the difference. No, they won’t suffer from neglect! They’ll blossom when your marriage—and their homelife—is thriving.
The surprising secret is that this doesn’t have to take any extra time in your already busy schedule. Just a change in attitude plus a committed focus can yield a stronger, happier marriage.
So here’s my challenge to you. Read the following suggestions and apply them in your marriage for the next 30 days. Then evaluate your marriage. I guarantee you’ll both be happier.
Look for the good, overlook the bad
You married this person for many good reasons. Your partner has many wonderful qualities. Your first step in adding sizzle to your marriage is to look for the good and overlook the bad.
Make it a habit to ignore the little annoying things — dirty socks on the floor, a day-old coffee cup on the counter, worn out flannel pajamas, an inelegant burp at the dinner table — and choose instead to search for those things that make you smile: the way he rolls on the floor with the baby; the fact that she made your favorite cookies, the peace in knowing someone so well that you can wear your worn out flannels or burp at the table.
Give two compliments every day
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Now that you’ve committed to seeing the good in your partner, it’s time to say it! This is a golden key to your mate’s heart. Our world is so full of negative input, and we so rarely get compliments from other people. When we do get a compliment, it not only makes us feel great about ourselves, it actually makes us feel great about the person giving the compliment! Think about it! When your honey says, “You’re the best. I’m so glad I married you.†It not only makes you feel loved, it makes you feel more loving.
Compliments are easy to give, take such a little bit of time, and they’re free. Compliments are powerful; you just have to make the effort to say them. Anything works: “Dinner was great, you make my favorite sauce.†“Thanks for picking up the cleaning. It was very thoughtful, you saved me a trip.†“That sweater looks great on you.â€
Play nice
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That may sound funny to you, but think about it. How many times do you see — or experience — partners treating each other in impolite, harsh ways that they’d never even treat a friend? Sometimes we take our partners for granted and unintentionally display rudeness. As the saying goes, if you have a choice between being right and being nice, just choose to be nice. Or to put this in the wise words of Bambi’s friend Thumper, the bunny rabbit – “If you can’t say somethin’ nice don’t say nothin’ at all.â€
Pick your battles
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How often have you heard this advice about parenting? This is great advice for child-rearing—and it’s great advice to follow in your marriage as well. In any human relationship there will be disagreement and conflict. The key here is to decide which issues are worth pursuing and which are better off ignored. By doing this, you’ll find much less negative energy between you.
From now on, anytime you feel annoyed, take a minute to examine the issue at hand, and ask yourself a few questions. “How important is this?†“Is this worth picking a fight over?†“What would be the benefit of choosing this battle versus letting it go?â€
The 60 second cuddle
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You can often identify a newly married couple just by how much they touch each other — holding hands, sitting close, touching arms, kissing — just as you can spot an “oldly-married†couple by how little they touch. Mothers, in particular, often have less need for physical contact with their partners because their babies and young children provide so much opportunity for touch and cuddling that day’s end finds them “touched fulfilledâ€.
So here’s a simple reminder: make the effort to touch your spouse more often. A pat, a hug, a kiss, a shoulder massage – the good feeling it produces for both of you far outweighs the effort.
Here’s the deal: Whenever you’ve been apart make it a rule that you will take just 60 seconds to cuddle, touch and connect. This can be addictive! If you follow this advice soon you’ll find yourselves touching each other more often, and increasing the romantic aspect of your relationship.
Spend more time talking to and listening to your partner.
I don’t mean, “Remember to pick up Jimmy’s soccer uniform.†Or “I have a PTA meeting tonight.†Rather, get into the habit of sharing your thoughts about what you read in the paper, what you watch on TV, your hopes, your dreams, your concerns. Take a special interest in those things that your spouse is interested in and ask questions. And then listen to the answers.
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Spend time with your spouse
It can be very difficult for your marriage to thrive if you spend all your time being “Mommy†and “Daddyâ€. You need to spend regular time as “Husband†and “Wifeâ€. This doesn’t mean you have to take a two-week vacation in Hawaii. (Although that might be nice, too!) Just take small daily snippets of time when you can enjoy uninterrupted conversation, or even just quiet companionship, without a baby on your hip, a child tugging your shirtsleeve or a teenager begging for the car keys. A daily morning walk around the block or a shared cup of tea after all the children are in bed might work wonders to re-connect you to each other. And yes, it’s quite fine to talk about your children when you’re spending your time together, because, after all, your children are one of the most important connections you have in your relationship.
When you and your spouse regularly connect in a way that nurtures your relationship, you may find a renewed love between you, as well as a refreshed vigor that will allow you to be a better, more loving parent. You owe it to yourself — and to your kids — to nurture your relationship.
So take my challenge and use these ideas for the next 30 days. And watch your marriage take on a whole new glow.
Parts of this article are excerpted with permission from books by Elizabeth Pantley:
Kid Cooperation: How to Stop Yelling, Nagging and Pleading Hidden Messages: What Our Words and Actions are Really Telling Our Children,
New Harbinger Publications, Inc. and by McGraw-Hill/Contemporary
Website:Â http://www.pantley.com/elizabethÂ
By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Gentle Baby Care
“Help! I’m getting so frustrated with the endless stream of advice I get from my mother-in-law and brother! No matter what I do, I’m doing it wrong. I love them both, but how do I get them to stop dispensing all this unwanted advice?â€
Just as your baby is an important part of your life, he is also important to others. People who care about your baby are bonded to you and your child in a special way that invites their counsel. Knowing this may give you a reason to handle the interference gently, in a way that leaves everyone’s feelings intact.
Regardless of the advice, it is your baby, and in the end, you will raise your child the way that you think best. So it’s rarely worth creating a war over a well-meaning person’s comments. You can respond to unwanted advice in a variety of ways:
Listen first
It’s natural to be defensive if you feel that someone is judging you; but chances are you are not being criticized; rather, the other person is sharing what they feel to be valuable insight. Try to listen - you may just learn something valuable.
Disregard
If you know that there is no convincing the other person to change her mind, simply smile, nod, and make a non-committal response, such as, “Interesting!†Then go about your own business…your way.
Agree
You might find one part of the advice that you agree with. If you can, provide wholehearted agreement on that topic.
Pick your battles
If your mother-in-law insists that Baby wear a hat on your walk to the park, go ahead and pop one on his head. This won’t have any long-term effects except that of placating her. However, don’t capitulate on issues that are important to you or the health or well-being of your child.
Steer clear of the topic
If your brother is pressuring you to let your baby cry to sleep, but you would never do that, then don’t complain to him about your baby getting you up five times the night before. If he brings up the topic, then distraction is definitely in order, such as, “Would you like a cup of coffee?â€
Educate yourself
Knowledge is power; protect yourself and your sanity by reading up on your parenting choices. Rely on the confidence that you are doing your best for your baby.
Educate the other person
If your “teacher†is imparting information that you know to be outdated or wrong, share what you’ve learned on the topic. You may be able to open the other person’s mind. Refer to a study, book, or report that you have read.
Quote a doctor
Many people accept a point of view if a professional has validated it. If your own pediatrician agrees with your position, say, “My doctor said to wait until she’s at least six months before starting solids.†If your own doctor doesn’t back your view on that issue, then refer to another doctor - perhaps the author of a baby care book.
Be vague
You can avoid confrontation with an elusive response. For example, if your sister asks if you’ve started potty training yet (but you are many months away from even starting the process), you can answer with, “We’re moving in that direction.â€
Ask for advice!
Your friendly counselor is possibly an expert on a few issues that you can agree on. Search out these points and invite guidance. She’ll be happy that she is helping you, and you’ll be happy you have a way to avoid a showdown about topics that you don’t agree on.
Memorize a standard response
Here’s a comment that can be said in response to almost any piece of advice: “This may not be the right way for you, but it’s the right way for me.â€
Be honest
Try being honest about your feelings. Pick a time free of distractions and choose your words carefully, such as, “I know how much you love Harry, and I’m glad you spend so much time with him. I know you think you’re helping me when you give me advice about this, but I’m comfortable with my own approach, and I’d really appreciate if you’d understand that.â€
Find a mediator
If the situation is putting a strain on your relationship with the advice-giver, you may want to ask another person to step in for you.
Search out like-minded friends
Join a support group or on-line club with people who share your parenting philosophies. Talking with others who are raising their babies in a way that is similar to your own can give you the strength to face people who don’t understand your viewpoints.
This article is an excerpt from Gentle Baby Care by Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)
By: Demetria Zinga
For me, it was “welcome to motherhoodâ€. Ready or not, I was in for a wonderful experience. But my first challenge was to overcome the first few months of literally no sleep. It was my first baby, and I felt the pressure of doing everything “just rightâ€. I wanted to be a perfect mom. But I quickly learned that parenting was going to be a lifelong journey and that I would make plenty of mistakes along the way.
After stumbling out of bed frequently for middle of the night feedings I’d wake up around 6 a.m. to my newborn crying a joyful solo for yet another feeding. After about three weeks of this, and then another month I was completely worn out! Following a cesarean section, I immediately thought I could be Supermom, Grand Interior Decorator, and the House Cleaning Company all at once, and of course I thought I could simultaneously juggle the responsibilities of a baby that I was so certain would sleep through most of the day and night.
After a few restless nights, and having noticed that my sweet infant was rarely sleeping at all, be it night or day, I began to really wonder about her. Was this going to be the norm? Did infants really stay awake for hours at a time demanding a feeding every hour and half? Was I doing something wrong? I couldn’t help but wonder if this pattern would ever end. I’d read all the many parenting articles that tell you when your infant should stop waking up so frequently and begin sleeping peacefully through the night. Well, I dare say that my little one kept waking up again and again for nights on end. After a few months I began to think I was the only mother out there suffering from severe sleep deprivation! Of course, I knew that I wasn’t REALLY the only one, but it sure hits home when it happens to you.
My young one is now an active toddler, and things have definitely improved as far as her sleeping habits go, but I learned quite a few things during those seemingly never ending nights of sleeplessness and days of extreme fatigue. If I had to do it all over again, I definitely wouldn’t have tried to be the Grand Interior Designer and the House Cleaning Company (and following a c-section at that)! Here are some handy tips that I should have used and will keep in mind when I have my next baby:
• Rest, rest, rest! Okay, it sounds trite, and while pregnant you’ve probably heard everyone in the world tell you to rest, but once you’ve given birth it’s even more important that you still adhere to the resting phase the first few days you are home from the hospital. I can’t even begin to explain how much rest is needed after a cesarean section…but in either type of delivery, your body needs time to recuperate, so take it easy. What does resting mean? It could mean using paper plates so there are fewer dishes to wash. It could mean having a friend or relative come sit with you a few hours a day and help you around the house (which is especially helpful if you have other younger children). And if you have older children, it could mean having them help out with more chores around the house. Most of all, it means to just let some things go. The dusting doesn’t have to be done right away…perhaps it can wait a few more days, or weeks even.
• People say to sleep while the baby is sleeping. Well, that didn’t work for me, mostly because I was attempting to get things done around the house that I couldn’t do efficiently when my daughter was awake. So here’s what I say: REST while the baby is sleeping. Sit down, take a break. Schedule that time, and give yourself at least 30 minutes to do absolutely nothing.
• Thicken baby’s milk. I breastfed my daughter for several months. In the beginning nurses were telling me that breastfed babies need to get fed more often because breast milk apparently “goes right through†their systems. After my daughter was a few weeks old they gave me the go-ahead on thickening her breast milk with rice cereal (about a teaspoon full). It did wonders for her nightly waking ritual. Instead of waking up every hour and half she slept about two hours longer than usual. I say that’s good for mom and baby! Of course, check with your pediatrician first, and again, there are differing views on thickening baby’s milk, so do (or don’t do) what you feel is best.
• Breastfeeding mothers take a break. For mothers who nurse, I highly recommend pumping so the baby can be given a bottle by other members of the family while you rest up. Breastfeeding is a demanding job and takes quite a bit of energy reserves. Did you know you burn approximately 500 calories during one nursing session? That’s equivalent to the amount of calories I burned on the treadmill a few days ago. So there’s another reason for you to take a breather.
• Take your prenatal vitamins. Keep taking these. You’ll need them, especially during this time of recovery. Your body needs all the minerals and vitamins necessary to boost your immune system and promote overall health. You’ll be glad you took them daily.
• Continue to eat for two. If you are nursing, this is an especially important concept, since you’ll need to eat enough to keep your milk reserves flowing. It’s very easy for postpartum women to want to begin dieting right after giving birth. However, the healthiest choice is to simply continue the intake of nutritious foods, and to eat enough to keep your energy levels up, because you will definitely need energy in the wee hours of the morning! In addition, doctors recommend that postpartum, nursing women intake anywhere from 2000-2400 calories per day. So eat, and eat healthy.
• Keep others in your life. Don’t ever feel alone or isolated. If you don’t have relatives nearby who can help, seek for help within your community: churches, civic groups and non profit organizations, as well as friends. In addition, there are a host of online communities and discussion groups specifically geared toward pregnancy and parenting issues that are helpful for new moms.
Most of all, do the things you like to do most: read, meditate, write, and work on crafts. Do something you truly enjoy every day for as much as you can. With time, your baby will start sleeping through the night, and one day you will realize that you can finally catch your “z’sâ€.
Article Source: http://www.thewahmshack.com/articledirectory
About The Author: Demetria Zinga is a Navy wife and mother of a fun preschooler. The founder of Christian Ladies Connect www.christianladies.net/ and Christian Ladies Talk Radio, a ministerial ezine and online radio podcast for Christian women, she has a passion to help other women.
By: Alyssa Avant
Sitting here days after giving birth to my second child, my head spins with thoughts, feelings and emotions. I am not sure exactly how a person is suppose to feel after becoming a mother for the second time, I’m not even sure how she should feel after becoming a mother for the first time. However, I can assure you the two experiences are very different. With my son, I was overprotective, emotional, and scared. I remember coming home from the hospital and wanting everyone to just go away so I could be alone with him, hover over him, and not let anyone else touch him. Visitors came and visitors went, it seemed like they’d never leave. I remember thinking and so I’m told even saying out loud, “I’m really tired, I think I need a napâ€, in hopes that they would get the hint and leave. My husband says at times I was on the verge of rude, and I’m not normally a rude person.
This time was different literally hours after giving birth to my second child, a daughter, I had a room full of friends and family, at the hospital I might add and I was literally sitting up in bed laughing my head off at their antics. After coming home, more friends and family flooded in and I just sat back smiling as they ooohed and ahhed over my daughter. It was not until the thought hit me that I was going to be caring for two that I even got the least bit scared. My husband was home for a week therefore; I had not yet experienced trying to do that on my own. However, as soon as the thought hit me, another one did as well, “If she can do it, I can do it.†She being all those moms you see in the grocery store, with newborn in the car seat and another child hanging on the end of the basket. I began to get a little more confident, I had completed other difficult tasks in my life, and surely, I can do this.
I have not yet discovered how I will make this all work, being that it is all still very new, however, I know that I will be caught trying to be the best mother I can possibly be.
Article Source: http://www.thewahmshack.com/articledirectory
About The Author: Alyssa Avant is a Christian Author and Speaker who helps moms connect with their daughters. A work at home mom , Alyssa is the founder of Beauty By Design Ministries, www.beautybydesignonline.com Receive a free “My Princess: A Letter from a Kingâ€, a letter from God to your daughter when you sign up for my e-zine. groups.yahoo.com/group/mom-daughter_connection/
After a baby is born, her brain and her nervous system get to work learning about how her body works and the world that she lives in. Despite the fact that a newborn sleeps quite a lot of her day, a baby’s brain and nervous system are incredibly busy. If fact, from birth to 2½ years old, a baby’s brain is the busiest that it will ever be in her entire lifetime as it learns to process information and to develop new skills. A baby learns that this is mom and that’s dad and how to move her body in space. She learns how to recognize important people in her life and what certain words mean.
From the age 2 ½ to 5, to improve efficiency, a child’s brain starts to prune down connections (the technical term is synapses) that aren’t used much. If parents play and engage with their babies (or children!), they help to strengthen synapses within the brain, and reduce the pruning process.
In summary, from birth to 5 years old, parents have a great opportunity to stimulate their child’s brain to ensure that its connections within the brain and to the body are strong. Here are some easy things that you can do to stimulate your child’s brain:
1. Delay returning to work for as long as possible. The first year of life is really important to establish the bonding and attachment process between a baby and her parents, especially with her mom. If mom or dad can be at home that first year, your baby will have more secure relationships with you and everyone else in her life.
2. Carry your baby around with you, wherever possible. The physical act of moving back and forth as you walk and bend stimulates the part of your baby’s brain that tracks balance and position of the body. Babies who are carried usually walk faster than babies who are not.
3. Breastfeed your baby as long as possible. Breastmilk contains all that a baby needs to support her developing brain and nervous system. It gives a baby immunity from viral or bacterial infections, it provides comfort and enhances the mother/baby bonding and attachment process. Studies have shown that babies who are breastfed have relatively higher intelligence than babies who are not.
4. Touch your baby whenever possible. The physical act of touch is a great way to stimulate your baby’s brain. Infant massage is especially beneficial because it provides the positive benefits of relaxation, improved digestion and an enhanced quality of sleep. You can learn infant massage from a certified infant massage instructor, or you can read books or watch videos. An added bonus is that the people who are giving the baby massage have improved health, reduced stress, and they sleep better, too!
5. Respond to your baby’s needs in a timely manner. When a baby cries, she is communicating a need for something that almost always is comfort, food, or a diaper change. The saying that “you’ll spoil a child if you go to her whenever she cries” is simply incorrect. When you respond to your child’s needs, your baby learns that mom and dad can be depended upon. She also learns that she has value as a person.
6. Read and sing to your baby. Language and music are great ways to stimulate a baby’s brain. We have a specific place in our brains that processes language and music and the more that you talk to your baby, the more stimulation that her brain will receive. Classical, country or light rock music are the best choices as their beat is stimulating, but not overly so. It is important to realize that television or radio programs are not a good substitute for a real conversation. A baby is not able to follow a television or radio’s message, and most babies tune out television or radio sounds because they over stimulate a baby’s brain.
In conclusion, the underlying principle is that the more time you spend with your baby or your child in play and with one-on-one interactions, the more you stimulate your baby’s or your child’s brain. Add some of the above suggestions to your day and everyone benefits from time spent together because it’s just plain fun!
Article Source: http://www.thewahmshack.com/articledirectory
About The Author: Dr. Melanie Beingessner is a chiropractor, a breastfeeding counsellor, a certified infant massage instructor & the mother of three fabulous kids. She is the author of The Calm Baby Cookbook, written to help breastfeeding moms calm their fussy babies by changing their diets. Dr. Melanie’s website provides information about pregnancy, breastfeeding, ADD/ADHD, chiropractic, health and wellness at drmelaniebee.org
As new parents, it can be daunting to try to soothe a baby when they fuss and cry. Here are some ideas that might help you to calm your baby.
1. Dance together. Gentle music soothes babies rather than fast music with a lively beat. By swaying and humming to the music, you can entertain a baby enough to help her relax and stop crying. If you can, make a tape or CD of your favorite slow songs and enjoy some bonding time together.
2. Carry your baby with you wherever you go. Studies have shown that babies who are carried cry less. Babies relax when they feel you close and hear your heartbeat. To make it easier on your back, a sling works best for a new baby. Baby carriers are excellent choices for babies that can sit on their own, as their backs can support their bodyweight in the sitting position.
3. Swaddle your baby before you rock her to sleep. New babies like to feel snug and cozy, and swaddling can create that feeling for them.
4. Skin-to-skin contact can help. One of the nicest ways to accomplish this, especially in the evening, is to run a warm bath, light a few candles and turn off the lights. Sit in the tub, place the baby on your chest, and cover her with a warm facecloth. Babies like the feel of the close contact, the warm water, and the pretty lights. Bath time is an excellent way for dad to have special bonding time and it gives mom a bit of a break.
5. Infant massage provides great relief for babies. It helps to promote relaxation, improved digestion, bonding and brain stimulation. Studies done on premature babies have shown that massaged babies sleep better, and gain weight more quickly, and infant massage for full term babies provides the same results.
6. Watch what you eat. If you are a breastfeeding mother and your baby tends to get fussy, especially after 5:00 pm, what you are eating can be causing your baby distress. If mothers can eliminate dairy products and other specific foods from their diets on a short-term basis, babies tend to become calm, relaxed and happy. For more information on this subject, please refer to drmelaniebee.org
7. Consult with a chiropractor. The birth process can be a difficult passage for some babies and sometimes a baby is fussy because her neck or back is hurting her. If the problem is caused by a vertebra that is not moving in a proper pattern of motion, chiropractic care is safe and effective treatment to relieve the problem.
Article Source: http://www.thewahmshack.com/articledirectory
About The Author: Dr. Melanie Beingessner is a chiropractor, a breastfeeding counsellor, a certified infant massage instructor & the mother of three fabulous kids. She is the author of The Calm Baby Cookbook , written to help breastfeeding moms calm their fussy babies by changing their diets. Dr. Melanie’s website provides information about pregnancy, breastfeeding, ADD/ADHD, chiropractic, health and wellness at drmelaniebee.org
While the breastfeeding process exists to nourish a newborn and to provide everything that it needs to grow, breastfeeding is much more than food for a baby. The entire breastfeeding process provides significant benefits for both the baby and the mother.
1. Breast Milk Is A Living Substance
Babies do not have a fully functioning immune system until they are one year old. For the first year of life, a breastfeeding mother actually provides the immune response for a baby who is exposed to a cold or flu. If a baby were to suffer a cold, his mother would immediately start to increase her white blood cell production to counteract the bacteria or virus whether or not she experiences the baby’s symptoms. The baby would get these doses of immunity through breast milk. Breast milk contains many white blood cells (the blood cells that fight bacteria, viruses and parasites) and because of them, breast milk can actually sit on a countertop for 8 hours and be perfectly safe to drink.
2. Breastfeeding Improves Health
The proteins, carbohydrates and fatty acids in breast milk provide everything that a baby needs to grow strong bones, muscles and tissues. All of these components of breast milk exist in perfect proportion to a growing baby’s needs. Breast milk proteins are easily digested and breastfed babies feed often to build up their mother’s milk supply. The fatty acids found in breast milk help to support the growth of the baby’s brain and nervous system. The carbohydrates (or sugars) found in breast milk provide energy for the baby to play and interact with her world.
Breastfeeding provides great health benefits for the mother after birth, it helps to contract the uterus back to its pre-pregnant state. Mothers who breastfeed for longer periods of time experience less breast or uterine cancer later on in life.
3. Breastfeeding Promotes The Bonding and Attachment Process.
The hormone oxytocin stimulates the let down reflex when a baby starts to breastfeed; however, the role of oxytocin is not just for breastfeeding. In fact, oxytocin is called the hormone of love. Our bodies release high doses of oxytocin during the infatuation stage of love which creates the wonderful high that we experience when we first fall for someone. Breastfeeding creates this same feeling of infatuation every time a mother breastfeeds her baby. These continual doses of oxytocin enhance the bonding and attachment process to securely attach the mother/baby pair.
A Critical Period to Establish Breastfeeding
We all know that breast milk is best for babies. However, there is a vulnerable time for both the mother and the baby for the first month after birth as they learn to breastfeed. Some babies learn easily, others take their time. If a baby is continually fussy during this process a new mother can interpret the fussiness to mean that the baby has a specific problem with her, and that can influence her decision whether or not to keep trying.
With a calmer baby, there is a greater chance that the mother will continue to breastfeed, which helps to create a more bonded mother and infant and a relatively peaceful home life. With the reduction of crying and fussiness, the relationship between the mother and father is less strained in the transitional year to becoming a family, and that helps to bond the family unit more easily.
The Reason Behind The Baby’s Crying
When a baby fusses or cries, especially in the evening, the problem is usually that the baby is experiencing an adverse reaction to something that the mother is eating. If a breastfeeding mother can alter her diet on a short-term basis, the baby usually calms down and the breastfeeding process becomes easier for both mother and baby.
The main food source that a breastfeeding mother eats that causes babies discomfort are cow’s milk proteins. Small amounts of cow’s milk proteins end up in breast milk and can cause the baby to experience either food hypersensitivities or food intolerances. The resulting symptoms are gas, bloating, discomfort and crying. (Sound familiar?)
There are other foods that consistently cause a baby to experience discomfort. For more information, please visit Dr. Melanie’s website.
Article Source: http://www.thewahmshack.com/articledirectory
About The Author: Dr. Melanie Beingessner is a chiropractor, a breastfeeding counsellor, a certified infant massage instructor & the mother of three fabulous kids. She is the author of The Calm Baby Cookbook, written to help breastfeeding moms calm their fussy babies by changing their diets. Dr. Melanie’s website provides information about pregnancy, breastfeeding, ADD/ADHD, chiropractic, health and wellness at drmelaniebee.org
By: Audrey Okaneko
I remember when I first announced that I was pregnant. Two things happened. I began getting phone calls of congratulations and I began getting advice.
Today, it is 20 years later and I’ve continued to get parenting advice through the infant stage, the toddler stage, the young adult stage, the teen stage and now the adult child stage. Everyone has advice to offer.
So, how can you stop yourself from going nuts with all of the advice? Here are a few of my suggestions.
Listen to those who you want to listen to. There is always something to be learned. You may pick up a tidbit of what to do or you just may be persuaded to never try something that is being offered to you as advice. I have had women over the years offer advice to me that I knew was exactly what not to do.
If you don’t want to listen, simply say “thank you, right now I’m just on information overloadâ€. Most folks will stop when asked to stop. When I was pregnant, I had some health issues. I was following the advice of my doctor. I think everyone I spoke to either knew someone or knew someone who knew someone else who had been through what I was going through and everyone wanted to help me. I simply said “thank you so much for caring, however I really need to listen to my doctor, I trust her 100%â€. At this point, most folks stopped offering their advice.
Through the years as I’ve had various parenting questions and parenting dilemmas, I have most definitely solicited information from others who had walked in my shoes previously. Again, listen to and take in what you find useful. If the information gets overwhelming, then once again thank people for their concern and change the subject.
Anyone who has been pregnant and had a child will have information and advice to share. It’s up to you how much you listen to and how much you say “no thanksâ€.
Article Source: http://www.thewahmshack.com/articledirectory
About The Author: Audrey Okaneko is mom to two girls. She can be reached at audreyoka@cox.net or visited at www.recipe-barn.com
My fourth baby was a preemie and I pumped for him for several months and eventually got him nursing, which was wonderful! And then a few months later I was….pregnant again!….and lost my milk supply.
It was very hard to not be able to nurse my preemie any more, and worried about him through RSV season since he did not have all those wonderful breastfeeding health benefits.
I think the best things I did in spite of not being able to nurse were to do all the cuddly things that I would have done even if I had been breastfeeding still. Hold him when he ate, slept next to him, and just made the feeding process as nurturing as possible.
It can be really hard to have breastfeeding be out of reach, but you can still love and nurture your little one no matter what!
I can tell you that my preemie is now 7 years old, and he’s been just as healthy as my other 5 children. 
I read a post from a military wife on one of my egroups today. She had just found out that her husband was being deployed and she was really feeling bummed out. During past deployments they had not gotten much help from church, community, or family members, and she was dreading being on her own again with four young children and little-if-any support.
Knowing that we have a lot of military families on our newsletter list, I thought I’d include my response to her here, plus ask you wonderful people to add any comments or suggestions you may have about getting the help you need during deployments. Spread the word to others that may have good ideas, too!
I can only imagine how daunting it is to face being on your own with the children and without your husband for an extended period of time. Yes, you “knew” when you married him it would include this…but knowing beforehand and knowing afterwards are two different things, right?
Would it be possible for your husband to specifically ask your church leadership or people in your church or community to help you? Or perhaps other military families with husbands that are not deployed? Maybe if it comes from the husband to other men, it might get taken more seriously….? Also, might it be possible for families in your church to take on some sort of a schedule for being extra support for you, such as one family per month to be “on call” if you have a plumbing problem or a car repair?
Many years ago when I was on bed rest during a difficult pregnancy I had 3 little ones ages 1, 3, and 7, and my husband worked 24 hour shifts. (still does) Having always been the helping sort, it was hard for me to ask for help although we badly needed it! Eventually what helped me ask-but-not-ask was to make up a list of things that I needed help with. People are famous for saying, “let me know if you need anything” but what woman really wants to call them and say “Hey–can you come clean my toilets?!” I started saying to people, “Well, it’s hard for me to remember everything and it’s hard for me to ask, but I did make up a list of things we could use help with. Maybe there is something on there you would feel like you could do.” If they were at my house they could just look at the list, and of course lists are easy to send by email. Either way, people could see a wide range of things that needed to be done and find stuff that was a fit for their personality or preferences. I was amazed that some friends came to clean bathrooms or to take laundry away!
I know that these suggestions aren’t going to solve all of your problems, but maybe one or two of them can help, or maybe inspire some other ideas that will be more successful for you.
Hey gals!
For several years now I’ve dearly loved receiving inspirational and encouraging emails from an online friend, Melissa. She always has a sweet spirit and practical words to help me keep on keepin’ on as I go through the daily ups and downs of being a woman, wife, and mother. Today I would like to share a recent message that Melissa allowed me to use here:
Evening all…
The Lord reminded me of something today that I tend to forget. See, I’m not always too keen on myself and often it shows. I’ll put my own needs way back on the burners. Of course being a mother tends to cause us to do that. We settle our family’s needs before we attend to ours. For the most part, that’s a good thing. We’re supposed to be tenders, the ones who mend hurts and are leaned on. The problem comes when we begin to dislike ourselves. When we’ve become so accustomed to looking away from our own needs, that they become abhorrent to us. And as our appearance might suffer—gaining weight, our clothes showing the wear of motherhood—we think less of our potential.
I told my husband I was going to talk to you all about this. My phrase to him was that I was going to talk about “Loving Myself No Matter What”…and he stopped me right there. He said that by tagging ‘no matter what’ onto that phrase, I’m limiting the love I’ll give myself. Think about it. We should love ourselves PERIOD. But we don’t. We say we will when we get our attitudes in control, or when we can keep the house clean, or when the weight is gone, or when our hair looks better, or when we have mothering down pat, or simply when we think we deserve it. We put stipulations on our affection for ourselves. Wrong.
There are some Christians who will pooh-pooh the idea of self-love, thinking it’s plain old egoism rearing its head. Women will go without adornments, or make-up or scent because it’s calling attention to themselves. They’ll allow the world to enjoy personal treats, but seem to enjoy the role of martyr. Or do they?
The Bible says for us to “Love your neighbor as yourself” but maybe that’s the problem. Maybe if we were more caring for our personal needs, maybe we’d all get along a bit better.
With love, truly—to you.
Melissa
To join Melissa’s email list (you just get her occasional emails, no messages from others in the group) send a blank email to themothershour-join@associate.com .